Msg for Wenders!

MLT · May 25, 2007 6:58AM

Hi Wenders
Ooooh, not long for you to wait - hope your baby is on time! Do you know what ur having? I'll be thinking of you over the next few weeks.
Matthew has been ok, i think, but i don't really know! We had an awful time b4, during and after his birth. Kidney and bladder probs b4 birth cos of where he was lying so lots of vomiting for me and no eating or sleeping for a week before he arrived. I couldn't get comfy and was in loads of pain so i was exhausted when we finally went into labour. It was really slow and i had to have an epidural after 2 days of labour (i had got to 6 cm on tens and g and air). They gave me the drug to speed up labour but it was still v slow. We lost his heart beat for a few minutes and he went back to back. I got to 9.5 cm but couldn't go all the way to 10 grrrr! So cos of failure to progress, worries over his and my size and cos of losing his heart beat it was emergency c-sec. I lost 1.5 litres of blood. Then i was ill again after birth cos of the iron tablets i was having. Matthew was fine - 7lb 10oz, but lost a lot of weight cos i was so poorly i struggled to breast feed. So we went on to bottle. He's fine now and growing like mad! The only real probs we have is that he doesn't like being/settling on his own, so i can't get things done sometimes and we end up having to have him on our bed next to us at night. Otherwise he's very good and a real cutie. I have struggled with bonding and a bit of depression cos of the difficult labour etc but things are getting much better now. Each day has its ups and downs but we are hoping for a smile from Matthew soon which will be fab. Pip the dog gets on with him ok but sometimes howls when he cries.
Sorry for the essay. Really hope all goes well for you when labour comes. Please let me know how you get on. I don't get on here much at the mo but i'll keep a look out for you.
Take care, Juliette and Matthew xx

wenders · May 25, 2007 6:58AM

hiya

so sorry only just saw your message! :roll:

It's now 16 days to go til my due date!

I can't wait though realy, I've been told twice now I'm having a boy but I won't really believe it until he's born.. We've choosen joseph patrick for his name but don't have a girl one so I hope it is a boy! lol $:\$ )

Sorry to here you had a tough time... in a way you expect it to be all ok but child birth is such a fickle thing! Your labour sounds like the trouble I had with my first son. I started slow labour and went 3 days on a tens machine before getting to consistant contractions every 5 mins, then was told that I was only 1cm!! Then it took another 2 days to give birth... I was borderline c-section and was on the drip too before I was luckly 10 cm in time so ended up with forceps delivery after my contractions ended up stopping completly after his head come out.

I totally understand where you're coming from. I never bonded with daniel until he was about 10 weeks old. & that was only because he had a bad cold and found it hard to breathe etc and that kicked in my motherly instincts. He's now 20 months old and we are very bonded & I love him to pieces!! $:\$ ) I looked after him properly but it was like I was looking after my nephew or my friends baby. It took a while before I realised he was ours to keep... sounds really weird but I couldn't get past the birth experience.

I ended up having counsilling with one of the HV's. She'd had offical training and is offered on my area so it may be a worth an ask for you? she worked part time as HV & part time as counsillor for mums. It was great as I didn't have to wait for months on a waiting list. I also ended up on Ad's and got dx for PND. I have got to say I'm not 100% over the birth but I'd say I'm pretty dam close! lol $:\$ ) so there is light att he end of the tunnel. The best thing I did was go on Ad's & had counsilling. It really helped LOADS! I wish I'd gone for it sooner as daniel was 5 months old for the counsilling and he was 8 months old byt he time I went on the pills.

This time aorund though I know the signs, so will be going for a chat with my GP alot sooner if things creep up again. It's weird because I would say that I'd never be the kind of person to take ad's before. :roll:

Have a look on the http://www.birthtraumaassociation.org.uk/ website.. It's really great and they have a forum too. It defintaly helped me for many months. I'd go on it every day with my issues and tried to help others with theirs. Eventually I realised that I wasnt going on it every day and now I don't need it at all.

I do think about what the birth is going to be like this time & was supposed to organise another visit to the hospital to kind of clear the images of last time but I'm nearly 2 weeks to go and I forgot about it!! lol $:\$ ) So I've realised that I'm alot more confident about this birth than I realised myself! I certainly didn't feel like this 2 motnhs ago!

Anyway dont' be sorry about the long post as mine has gone on for ages! lol If you want to chat then just email me. wendy xxxxx $:\$ )

Msg for Wenders!

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