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Back 2 Work ;-(

I actually don't have to return to work until April 2008, but I am already worried sick about it! I do NOT want to leave my little girl. I work 55 hours per week & have to return for the money. My step mum has offered help once I return as has my mum in law, who I am starting to feel resentful towards as I don't want to be away from my little girl & have her being bought up & sharing all of her fun moments with someone else. I am grateful that they've offered to help, but I would absolutely love to spend every waking moment with her until she is pre-school age. Does anyone else feel like this??


  • Hi Donnaruby, I know exactly how you feel. We are fortunate enough to have our own business that we run from home however since having our lo I am now out of the picture. I now have a choice whether we get someone to replace my role at work or get childcare in to look after my little bab. Trouble is as much as I want to get back to the business, I can't bear the thought of leaving my lo with someone else and miss out on his milestones in growing up.

    It seems so unfair but I guess we sometimes have to do what's best for our precious ones :\(
  • hello

    my little boy is 8 months and i am due to return at the end of jan, i am absolutely dreading it! reece doesnt sleep and i dont know how i will fit in work on top of everything else i do, i dont seem to have time to spend an hour cleaning, let alone anything else, and like you (and every mum i am sure) i am so scared of missing those precious moments. my work have treated me like poo whilst i have been off thou and that hasnt helped. if i do go back (and its a big if at the moment) i will be cutting my hours right down. we dont have that much cash now as i am on unpaid maternity but you can only spend what you have got.

    to me, working 55 hours a week is far too much, there have been times in the past where i have done 60 (pre baby) and been exhausted, i cant imagine doing all the baby things on top of that. if i was you (and please dont think i am being patronising) i would not work that amount of hours now. is there any other help you would get if you earnt less? aparantly the cab can tell you what you would get in benefits according to your salary, so you could give them different scenarios and see what you would be entitled too. good luck, jo xx
  • hiya, i'm going back at the end of Nov (oh no it is so close now!) even though I can legally stay off til Jan, but we can't afford for me to stay off til then. I am also dreading leaving my little boy, I feel as though I will miss out on so much. I looked into the possibility of reducing hours/working part time or giving up work completely but I would only be able to claim 50 quid a week if I did that and with a mortgage to pay and other bills it just aint possible! We can't even afford to reduce my hours. It seems so unfair that we work hard yet have no spare cash.

    I am lucky as my work have been quite good about what hours I will work and whilst I will be going back full time I will be doing 7.30am til 3.45pm which means I will still have abit of time with baby after work. God, I don't know how you do 55 hours, that must be awful. Maybe you could look into reducing your hours, or maybe start looking for a job with more child friendsly hours????

    I hope we have made you feel better knowing there are other mums in the same position xx
  • hi i feel the opposite!! i have just started back to work having 7 months off in total and im loving it! does that make a a bad mother?! im a psychiatric nurse and i love my job and i missed adult company sooooo much! i appreciate joseph alot more now and am smug that my husband is feeling how hard it is to look after a child! he thought i had an easy ride!!!!!
  • it sucks doesn't it, we want children so we can bring them up but we have to work too it's like we are split in two! i'm sure when you go back you will adjust to it and make up for your time away on your days off x.
  • Hi Donnaruby, like you I am due to return to work at the end of April 2008 and like you am already petrified at the thought of it, but I have no choice but to return as like so many families out there (unless you are bum) you have no choice, its about time the government did something to help families - after all you never get this time back
  • Hi

    I am self employed and had planned to take about 6 months off and then return part time, this didn't work out unfortunately.
    I work with my husband and our friend and business partner very sadley died of a bleed on the brain when I was 7 months pregnant, this resulted in me working the day before I went into labour and returning to work when my LO was 3 weeks old, luckily being self employed has enabled us to change the business and work only mornings and I find this a nice compromise, I am very lucky that both our mums are here to help so I do not have to worry about leaving Maddie with a stranger and as she has suffered with colic or milk intolerance (yet to be confirmed) I must admit the change of scene was quite nice.
    I think that you always manage to adapt to the situation and being away from your baby really makes the time together so precious and special, although I would not want to be away from her all day mornings seem to be just right.
  • here here!!! i agree. if i was a young kid, or had probs with drugs/alchohol they would be throwing money at me. this country has its priorities all wrong. someone i know works ft but gets paid pt in to her bank and the rest cash in hand, so she gets loads of benifits she's not really entitled to! we have struggled for last couple of months what with moving and everyything and its been like getting blood from a stone. we are honest decent people who have work ft since school (14 yrs ago) we dont want more than we should just some help!!!
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