Neonatel birth at 20 weeks
Hi everyone, hope someone chats to me.
I was 19+5 when i went to the docs with a bit of spotting and discharge 3 days later had to be induced because my waters had ruptured and delivered my baby Hope, only to be told after i left the hospita that my baby had lived for 20mins and never had the opportunity to hold my baby alive and feel angry and cheated about this.
But am dealing with this and am really missing being pregnant, anxious about future pregnancy. My husband and i were sooo excited about our first baby and can t wait to try again. Part of me wants to just try straight away. Its only been 2 weeks and we want to have sex but also have been told for dating purposes to wait until had 1 period.
Has anyone had a live birth at 20 weeks or lost a baby at 20 weeks? Have you gone on to have a healthy pregnancy.
Love to hear from you.
Alex
I was 19+5 when i went to the docs with a bit of spotting and discharge 3 days later had to be induced because my waters had ruptured and delivered my baby Hope, only to be told after i left the hospita that my baby had lived for 20mins and never had the opportunity to hold my baby alive and feel angry and cheated about this.
But am dealing with this and am really missing being pregnant, anxious about future pregnancy. My husband and i were sooo excited about our first baby and can t wait to try again. Part of me wants to just try straight away. Its only been 2 weeks and we want to have sex but also have been told for dating purposes to wait until had 1 period.
Has anyone had a live birth at 20 weeks or lost a baby at 20 weeks? Have you gone on to have a healthy pregnancy.
Love to hear from you.
Alex
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Replies
Please take comfort in the thought that many ladies go on to have healthy pregnancies following a loss. Xxxxxx
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I was 11wks when I found out I was having twins but they'd stopped growing a 8wks. I know how heart broken I was at 11wks so I can imagine how you must feel, my heart goes out to you.
I haven't been through what you have but I'll tell you about a friend of mine.
She has lost 2 babies 1 at 5mths & 1 at 7mth & she had an ectopic before those. She now has 2 children, I know what a difficult time shes had. After my MMC in july she told me that when she held her son all the pain & hurt went away.
I know nothing will make you feel better now but 1 day soon I hope your pain will ease.
Take Care
Love Helen x x
Time really is a great healer and i would have cheerfully punched any one else who had said that to me at the time but hosestly it is, naturally you will worry throughout any more pregnancies but i have gone on to have 2 more healthy children since then and although i worried myself sick it was worth it all
Thank you for you reply. Its hard to explain how i feel and i suppose only someone who has had a similar experience can understand but even now i feel guilty that i'm feeling less sad an emotional, weird isn't it. I guess moving on means feeling stronger but knowing that i never goes away, the feeling of loss.
How long did you wait before you tried again? Did you do anything about the hospital blunders people are advising me to but i'm not sure and think it might make a difficult situation harder?
xxxxxxxxx
Good luck with everything you decide. xx
The other side of midnight
Not so many miles away
Wrapped in hazy memories
Our new-born babies play
Tended safe by unknown hands
In a place we cannot see
Our babies live another life
From earthly cares set free
From the other side of midnight
They visit us in sleep
Caress our grief with infant hands
When in our dreams we weep
Though in our darkest days we seem
A million miles apart
In time we learn that other place
Is really in our hearts
The other side of midnight
At last we learn to see
Our babies live within us
Cradled in our memory
Take care xo
Very sorry about your loss, and that you never got a chance to hold your baby.
The poem from misslauri86 is really moving. Made me cry.
I hope you get the support you need from here.
All the best for the future.
Gina xx