It's not working - am going to be a single mum and terrified
Hi,
My worst fears were confirmed when my computer flashed up I'd a new email and found myself in his account. An old flame contacted him and he wasn't introducing me or his 8 month old son anytime soon. Instead he was fixing to meet her. I've been a part time single mum since his paternity leave was cut short, we live 75 miles apart. He's with me whenever he isn't working, but there's a couple of windows in his shift which got longer over the past couple of months.
He didn't meet her, and there wasn't any romantic connotations in his responses, however he lied about where he was whenever he wasn't working, and changed his profile on messanger from the pic of him and his son, to him and his nephew. He was even on messanger with her, claiming to me to be on with his brother, in the living room with me there, reading a story to his son!
My hardest heartache was him hiding Frank...he should be proud of him. Whatever has been going on with us...not been a picnic and I know I've been difficult to live with suffering from pnd, I don't know if i can get passed this and need advice, please. Would you forgive him? Am I not better off living on my own now I know I can't trust him? I'm currently questioning if this is only the tip of the iceberg and looking over every time we've been apart and I haven't heard from him...really don't need the headache!
Best wishes
Maryb:?
My worst fears were confirmed when my computer flashed up I'd a new email and found myself in his account. An old flame contacted him and he wasn't introducing me or his 8 month old son anytime soon. Instead he was fixing to meet her. I've been a part time single mum since his paternity leave was cut short, we live 75 miles apart. He's with me whenever he isn't working, but there's a couple of windows in his shift which got longer over the past couple of months.
He didn't meet her, and there wasn't any romantic connotations in his responses, however he lied about where he was whenever he wasn't working, and changed his profile on messanger from the pic of him and his son, to him and his nephew. He was even on messanger with her, claiming to me to be on with his brother, in the living room with me there, reading a story to his son!
My hardest heartache was him hiding Frank...he should be proud of him. Whatever has been going on with us...not been a picnic and I know I've been difficult to live with suffering from pnd, I don't know if i can get passed this and need advice, please. Would you forgive him? Am I not better off living on my own now I know I can't trust him? I'm currently questioning if this is only the tip of the iceberg and looking over every time we've been apart and I haven't heard from him...really don't need the headache!
Best wishes
Maryb:?
0
Replies
If you stand a chance of being together this kind of behaviour is absolutely not acceptable.
Have you challenged him about it?
He is completely out of order and utterly disrespectful towards you.
If it's out in the open he's got the chance to make it right, grovel, apologise and put a stop to everything he's been up to.
If you find this doesn't happen, or that you can't live with him after doing what he's done then be brave and go. If you think he will continue telling lies about everything, you are quite right, you don't need the heartache.
Being on your own is scary, just the thought of it - but I promise you, it's a damn sight better than staying with someone who is taking the piss out of you, especially after having his child. You will think more of yourself if you go.
Please, do NOT excuse him any of this by thinking you've been difficult to live with because of PND.
He should be being loving and supporting you at this time, not making a tough situation worse.
Good luck hun, thinking of you!
love Louise xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I understand why you are concerned about his behaviour and it is definitely not acceptable, but if there was no romantic nature then maybe you have something to hold onto. It has obviously been a difficult time for you and will therefor have also been difficult for him. Maybe he didn't feel he could tell you about getting back in touch with this woman because he was worried how you would take it, rather than because he is trying to decieve you.
You need to talk to him, his reaction will tell you what you need to know about whether you can trust him. People act like idiots sometimes, it doesn't mean you can't resolve things or that it has to be the end of the line. Do what is right for you and your family.
Kate
My baby's Dad walked out on us when I was 5 months pregnant. He left not long after we found out I was carrying a girl (He wanted a son) The only time he has seen his daughter is when she stopped breathing the first night we came home from hospital and was rushed back in. After that he sent me a text saying not to EVER call or text him again.
We are better off without him. My daughter has all the love she can handle and is a happy, contented little thing. And there is love still to be found for us single Mummys! I called a carpenter to give me a quote to hang some doors when I was 7 months pregnant and he asked me out! We've been together ever since!