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so upset - updated

im so upset im sitting here crying my eyes out
i have a blind cat and on wednesday she will be going to a re-homing place i always knew this day would come but i have put it off and off and now im 37 weeks on wednesday i couldnt put it off anymore.

i rescued her myself from a family that mistreated her (which is y she is blind) and she is such a happy fat cat now she has a perfect life with me and kirk and i feel like im letting her down, she hasnt done anything wrong but she will be suffering.

she is going to the best re-homing place in london/essex she will have her own central heated pen with loads of room, i know she is going to a great place but im just gonna miss her sooooooo much

someone tell me im doing the right thing, i cant see a way round it she is blind and i wouldnt be able to trust her with a baby which will scare her and cause her to lash out (which she still does to me and kirk sometimes)

update

well coco went on wednesday but im really struggling with it, i just miss her silly lil ways so much when i get up in the morning i still call her name and then remember shes not here and end up crying my eyes out
i dont feel like anyone understands what im going through all kirk says is dont upset ur self babe but thats impossible
on the morning she went i got up and was instantly crying and throwing up i just didnt want her to go, we took her to the place and when we left i was crying/throwing up and punching kirk in the chest begging him to go and get her back
she is now on the website to be re-homed
http://www.chestnutcatsanctuary.co.uk/Content/adopt-a-single-cat?page=2
and she looks so beautiful and she is actually in her bed!!!! she never got in her bed when she was here!!!
im sorry if im bringing anyone down but i just really needed to write this down as no-one around me lets me talk about is as it upsets me so bloody much


[Modified by: victoriarogers7 on 26 April 2008 09:13:23 ]
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Replies

  • You are totally doing the right thing, but I feel for you. We have a cat, I inherited him when I moved in with my other half, he's had him for 5 years. He's lovely, but I don't know how he'll be around baby. I'm not so much worried that he'll lash out but that he'll get into the cot while its nice and warm and either sit on baby or leave his hairs everywhere. He has started bringing mice in for me as well which is not good!
  • aw hun i really feel for you! it's awful losing pets, let alone giving them up. but like you said, she's a blind cat and may well harm your LO without even knowing or understanding.i really do think you are doing the best thing and it sounds as though you've chosen a brilliant place for her to go. your new baby will fill the void in a way, i know you'll miss your cat tonnes but you'll be so busy with your new arrival that your cat probably wouldnt have gotten as much attention anymore anyway. sorry to hear your sad news. for the best though xx
  • hi hun i have 3 cats and i adore them but when i had my son now 1 i was worried as one is 10 and a miserable so and so! but apart from the damn cat hairs they have been ok. my son strokes them and my male sometimes scratches him but he will have to learn not to pull tails!!! my youngest cat is brill with him. however i do find it hard work when they get in the cot (no when my son is in there ever) and make a mess and yes bring in animals during the summer!! i can understand why you rehoming your cat if you are worried. i wouldnt have any pets if i had had my son first! x
  • aww hun, as hard as it is you are definatly doing the right thing. xxx
  • You are definately doing the right thing, cats can be a touch unpredictable at the best of times and it wouldn't be fair on her to expect her to understand about a baby that she can't see. Linzi is right that you won't have much time for her so she may even be happier with someone else who can give her more attention. I really feel for you, I have had my cat 8 years and fortunately he has always been very good with Millie but I was dreading having to rehome him if he wasn't.
    xx
  • aaww babe - u r definately doing the right thing.
    i know its hard now but when ur baby is here all u will be doing is worryin about them both. making sure u know where the cat is at all times ect.

    after i had my first i moved bk in with my mum 4 a while and all i done was worry if my cat that i grew up with since i was about 10 - who is as soft as anything - was near my baby as - like Gill - i was worried she was going to lay on him, U will have the extra worry of ur cat lashing out which isnt fair on either of them.

    i think ur making the right decision babe xx
  • Oh Victoria I don't know what to say - I have 2 cats and absolutely dote on them and there is no way I could ever bring myself to get rid of them. I completely understand how upset you are feeling and your want to keep your LO safe...have you thought of using cat nets? if she is blind and getting on a bit she is unlikely to harm LO if you keep an eye on it all - my hubby and I have been doing all sorts of reading up on how to introduce cats to babies.

    I understand how awful you feel but I have to say (and I hope I don't get lynched here) that I am very much of the opinion that if you have a pet then you should take every measure to try and make everything work and only get rid of the animal as an absolute last resort. Sorry - I am a big animal lover and it really upsets me when I hear these stories but please don't think i'm judging you - its only an opinion

    Abby x
  • Hi hun, sorry to hear you are upset. I'm sure you are doing the right thing.

    Katie and bambino.x x x
  • I think your doing the right thing, and just think in a few weeks time you'll have a baby! Babies are far nicer than cats!! xx
  • You are doing the kindest thing for your cat. We have two cats that are on a waiting list for an RSPCA centre and I wish I had done it before I had my lo as its caused us a lot of stress. The arrival of a baby has caused territorial problems for mine as it does a lot of pets and they have been weeing on all of her things and trying to sleep in her cot/anywhere that is hers really. Its been very upsetting (not to mention expensive replacing car seats etc...).

    Your cat will find a nice loving home and you can be relieved that you acted before there was any trouble.
  • Hi,

    Im really sorry to hear your making such a sad decision. Can I ask why you want to let her go?

    I have a blind three legged cat (yep no joke) and I totally adore her. I know she will find it hard to adjust with a baby as she is a stubborn old misery at times but im confident she will and will be just as loving with baby as she is with us.

    is there anyway you can see yo maybe give her a chance and see if she is good with your LO?

    It sounds mad but cats do have a sixth sense about babies. My Mum and Dad had a cat when my sister and i were young that was blind and viscious but never ever hurt either my sister or I although regulary took it out on my mum and dad. I think they know to be gentle and I think she might suprise you.

    Good luck with your decision it must be awful

    Vx

    [Modified by: VICKIT on April 21, 2008 12:36 PM]
  • I think your doing the right thing, and just think in a few weeks time you'll have a baby! Babies are far nicer than cats!! xx
  • Hi hun.
    What a horrible time for you.
    When I was expecting my son I had two cats, one was really possessive over me and would attack my oh if he got too close so I had to re-home both of them as they were brothers and really close.
    I now have another two cats. One is totally chilled and layed back ther other has cataracts in both eyes and only sees hazy images. She does swipe at small children because they move too quick when they go to touch her or walk past. I have trained all my nieces and nepwhews to walk slowly past her and to let her smell them before trying to stroke her. I did this from when they first started to move around under their own steam. She won't voluntarily go near them and will generally stay up out of their way. She has swiped at ds on occaision if she is feeling particularly miserable.
    We have decided that we will wait and see what happens. Unfortunately she has been with us since she was 5 weeks old and hates being away from us so I would have to have her put down for her own sanity and other peoples safety (we adopted a cat many years ago that was unhappy at being seperated from it's much loved previous family and we got badly attacked, I had 24 stitches and my step son had 13 on his knee)
    I completely sympathise with you. It's not an easy choice to make but if you are really concerned then it's better for your own peace of mind and safety of your lo.
    I'm sure they will find her a lovely home and maybe one day when lo is a bit older you could get a kitten or rehome another cat.
    xx

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  • awww i had to send ours to a rehoming place on sat, he's just too playful and i know he would scratch the baby or lay on him. ours was called cuddles cattery and it was lovely. i rang this morning and he's settled in ok wasa bit bewilderd at first but fine now. youve done the right thing, dont worry. there will be another kind soul such as yourself who'l take him in. xx
  • Aww hun I feel so sorry for you. I have a cat too, and he is a bit of a bruiser. But he lives outside all year round as he has a little 'house' in the shed (door has little gap for him), so I dont have any worries about him.

    You have done your best to find a fab re-homing facility, and Im sure they will find her a brilliant home. Anyone who takes on a blind cat is obviously doing it out of love for the animal, and will give it a brilliant home.

    You are definately doing the right thing for your baby's safety, and you have done your best and the right thing for your cat too. xx



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  • Im sorry but I dont agree, I hope you dont think im rude but I would prefer people told me their real opinions. Cats are bloody clever and he will learn very quickly to stay out the way of a crying baby, I bought cat nets but never used them as cat stayed out of way. My cat isnt blind but he is long haired (and gets poo stuck to him) and brings in dead rats so i do have to be careful and the boys are my priority but i wouldnt get rid of him for the world. I also have a resuce dog and was really scared as to how he would be with my boys, it has been hard work but the boys now think the world of the dog and cat, their first word was tat (cat) and im really glad i kept them. The boys are learning to treat animals with respect, ive made sure that i have provided space where the animals can escape to and where the boys cant get them. Im sure you have thought it through and ultimatly you have to do what is right for you however just coz a baby is arriving doesnt in my opinion mean you have to get rid of your cat. xxDBxx
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  • i wanna say thankyou to most of u as u have made me feel loads better im really struggling with what i have to do on wednesday i do not want to but i have no choice coco will still attack me and oh at times so theres no way i could ever trust her around lo
    i honestly think that unless u have a BLIND cat u dont understand what its like!!! she does lash out at strange people and noises all the time!!!
    as i said im not doing this out of choice i do not want to get rid of coco because i love her with all my heart but obviously the baby comes first doesnt it???
    this is the hardest thing i have EVER had to do and being judged does not help!!!!
  • Hey. Please dont think I am judging you, the fact that you have written on here how you feel shows that it is really upsetting you and I truely believe that everyone has to do what is right for them, and often the hardest things we have to do are the right ones.

    I just wanted to give my opinion, your right i dont know your cat or your life but I just wanted to say that it can be possible to have a cat and a baby, but i understand if its not possible to have your cat and your baby. Im sure you have explored every option but ive changed my mind on things after reading posts on here and I just wanted to give you my experience and a possible alternative. Im sorry if I have caused any offence and i didnt want to make you feel worse. xxDBxx

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  • hi
    unfortunatly this is my last option with coco im finding it very hard and upsetting and i have really left it to the last minute to do. i just hope and pray she finds a nice family who will love her as much as i do xxx
  • I know exactly how you feel, we had 3 dogs who were all lovely but because they were mastives they were very large and boisturous, so we didnt feel safe to have them around our son when he was born 20 months ago.. It was heart breaking. You have definately doen the righ thing though, as much as you love your pet there is no point endangering your child or even putting your self under stress of constantly worrying just in case. Your obviously a very caring mum and he or she is lucky to have you x
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