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who's going to be your birth partner?

Hi mums and bumps

I was just wondering who you were planning to take with you when your in labour? It was just me and my oh when i had my son 20 months ago and were doing exactly the same this time. My oh was absolutely amazing, he didnt leave my side once during my 48 hour labour(well only to go to the loo) For me it made the whole thing, that little bit more special. We were the ones that created him and the ones that brought him into the world together!

Origionally i asked my mum along, but she said no as she said she couldnt bear to see me in pain, then my MIL said she wanted to come, which i was happy about but then my mum changed her mind,so eventually we decided it wasnt fair to have either.

I am so glad that things turned out the way they did and i feel so lucky to have such a woonderful oh.

My SIL had a baby last November and her mum went along as well as my oh brother. When we went round after it was her mum who told us all about the labour ect and i felt so sorry for his brother as it was obvious that he had been pushed to one side (i'm not saying everyone will be like this)

Anyway who are you all planning on taking?
xx
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Replies

  • I'm definitely just taking my OH. Wouldn't dream of having anyone else there tbh, for the reasons you've said ... I know he would feel pushed out & I wouldn't want that. I think it will be so special if its just the 2 of us there at my son's birth.

    It just feels like way too much of an intimate thing to have anyone else so I am glad you had a positive experience with just you & OH because everyone else (except my oh who's dead against it like me) seems keen for me to have someone else there.

    http://bd.lilypie.com/Akv50/.png

  • I am taking hubby. He really wants to be there to see the special thing we made come into the world. He hasn't had the nicest of childhoods and really wants to get it right from the begininng with this baby so he's cutting the cord too!

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  • It really is magical for it to be just you and oh (well it was for me) i kind of lost him at the end though. The midwife told him she could see the head, so he went down below and started screaming "i can see his hair, my sons got black hair" while crying his eyes out (bless him) he never let go of my hand though!!

    He wanted to cut the cord but it was wrapped around our sons neck so they had to cut it before his body was born,hopefully he'll get another chance this time.
  • Definitely my husband! I won't be letting him out of my sight once it all starts, lol! If he can't keep me calm noone can! But at the same time, I think I might want my mum around at first, just cos she's been through it all so it won't seem as scary to her hopefully. But I don't think I'd want her in the room when I was actually giving birth- that'd feel really weird for me.
  • hi
    it will just be my OH for the same reasons, we made her n i just want it to be our special moment xx
    Tracey 33.1 weeks
  • Only my husband. I feel its important that we do it together and also i dont want anyone at the hospital but us. I want us to have at least a little bit of time to bond as a family before everyone descends on us. I hate being fussed and i wouldnt like it if our mums where there plus im not very patient. My mum and husband can easily forgive the things i say when im losing it but im pretty sure my mil would never be the same with me again!!
  • It was just me and oh last time and it will be again this time. I like to be left pretty much alone, no back massages etc for me! but I really apreciated him being there. Hopefully he will get to cut the cord this time, last time it was a bit of a panic and he didn't get chance.
  • i think ill take me my she was there 4 my sis and my bf dont like 2 see me in pain lol

    http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev350pp___.png

  • Just hubby.
  • I'm just having my husband, basically for all the reasons everyone else has said. We're the ones who created this life, its only right that we're the ones who see it brought into the world. I'm a bit worried about how he'll cope though. He hates seeing me in discomfort now, like if I'm ill so I just hope he can deal with seeing me in agony!
    I had my mum with me when I gave birth to my first but her bio logical dad wasnt interested at the time so it was either my mum or no one!
    xxx
  • i had my oh my mum and one of my sisters with me all through on my first 7 yrs ago. and it really was a lovely experiance my mum and sister stood back after lo was born so my oh could hold her after me etc. this time i will def have my oh my mum and maybe one of my other sisters with me to give them a chance if they want. i can understand though that some might not like this but i have to say i think it had a big influance on why my mum is so close to my daughter.
    each to there own. lol
    steph
    15+2
  • I am just having oh, with my first I had oh and my mum and second I just had oh and found it a slightly more special moment between the 3 of us. Plus sometimes where our mums have been through it they always know best even though things have changed a lot since having us!

    As oh works nights and a good couple of hours away and doesnt drive, there would be a small delay in him getting there I have actually chosen my sister who is only 16 to stay with me and my mum have the girls. I am closest to my sister and she is actually hoping that oh is at work! I chose her as she is more laid back and I can maybe relax a little more as she will be making me laugh!

    xx

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    http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev199pb___.png

  • I'll b havin oh 4 same reasons as others have already said, plus i'd feel guilty crushin sum1 elses hand to pieces but oh helped make the baby so he can take sum of the pain gettin it out! xxx
  • My OH, for all the reasons above! I can't imagine him not being there, and I don't think he could imagine it either. He's normally quite squeamish so I'd assumed he wouldn't want to go near the gorey bits, but he's hoping to be there cutting the cord too - good man! I bet we're both crying like idiots at the end tooimage

    We're also hoping for a bit of quiet time just the three of us once the baby's born so aren't planning to tell friends or family when labour begins, or they'd start heading for the hospital! xx
  • okay i know this sounds awful bt i am not sure that i want it to be just me and oh....he hasn't shown much interest in the pg, hasn't bothered to do anything to the nursery and won't help around the house (still doing all the housework, cooking etc and running around after my 5 yr old). If i try to talk to him about lo or the birth, he chnges the subject. Am a bit worried that he won't be any help at all when i am in labour so am considering asking my mum along as well (or SIL who i am v close with). I don't want him to feel pushed out but with just 7 weeks to go, he is making no effort to help or try to understand the childbirth process. i would never tell him he can't be there and i want him there, but maybe someone else for me to rely on in case he can't cope, having not prepared himself?
    I do wish that he could seem a little more interested and take the time to understand...can't have it all can we ladies?!?
    by the way, my 5 yr old is not hubby's - when i had her, i had her dad there (who was a pain in the neck and not very helpful - kept bossing the midwives around) and my mum who was great.
    sorry, this has turned into a rant!!!
    Claudia 33+2
  • Im taking my mum. My ex (babys dad) wants to be there but he shows no interest whatsoever and only wants to be involved when it suits. In a perfect world id like him to support me and be there but its not perfect now and tbh i cant see it getting any better
  • Just hubby. It's his first (my second) so think it'll be very special for him & he seems to be quite looking forward to it, though he's said he doesn't want to cut the cord, which is fine. I kind of wish my 14yr old daughter could be there too, but I don't want her to see me in loads of pain (if I'm honest I'd partly like her to be there so it puts her off becoming a mum too young - does that sound awful?)
  • Hi All I am having my oh and my step daughter (if she manages to get out of bed & dressed in time, lol!) She will be almost 15 by then and really wants to see her little bro/sis born and I also feel that it will help create a special bond between them! However she is a typicall teenager so if Igo in the middle of the night she may not get out her pit! Tammi xxx
    33.3 wks
  • Hi All I am having my oh and my step daughter (if she manages to get out of bed & dressed in time, lol!) She will be almost 15 by then and really wants to see her little bro/sis born and I also feel that it will help create a special bond between them! However she is a typicall teenager so if Igo in the middle of the night she may not get out her pit! Tammi xxx
    33.3 wks
  • Hi Tammi, I know exactly what you mean about getting your step-daughter out of her pit, my daughter's exactly the same. I can just imagine me going into labour & her saying she'll be ready in an hour when she's straightened her hair & done her make-up!!!!! But if we have to go to the hospital in the middle of the night she'll be coming whether she likes it or not!
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