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Think this is pretty unbelievable ! ! ! (quite long)
Hello.
My partners daughter finally went in to labour yesterday, 10 days overdue. We (Me + partner + daughter + partner) arrived at the hospital delivery suite at approx 7pm and she was shown in to a delivery room. By now she was in a lot of pain and very tearful. This was her first child and she's only 20.
After examination she was 5cm dilated. Myself and OH popped out and came back. we were told that nothing would happen until morning and so she would be going on to a delivery suite ward til then. Obviously we knew that we would have to go then.
What took us by total surprise was that her partner was told that he would have to go too!! By now she was already very distressed ,scared, very upset and in pain. To then be told that everyone had to go was unbelievable.
I myself am due in July and it would have never entered my mind that my partner would have to go and i'd be without anyone close with me. I find this policy quite ridiculous.
He does not drive and had to rely on us to be able to get him there when needed. The journey to hospital is 30 minutes. Surely having him there to just sit by the bed to comfort and reassure her was not too much too ask. He wouldn't be making anymore noise than she was!
Finally, two hours after getting home he got the call to return at 11pm. Their baby was born at 3.18am. Bearing in mind that there is no public transport until morning he was then told he would have to leave at 5am where he sat for 45 mins waiting for a lift home.
Is it just me that finds this really surprising. I've always assumed that your partner is there with you from beginning to end for support and encouragement etc.
Does anyone else find this totally out of order or r u already aware of this happening??
Would be interested to hear from anyone please.
Jules.
My partners daughter finally went in to labour yesterday, 10 days overdue. We (Me + partner + daughter + partner) arrived at the hospital delivery suite at approx 7pm and she was shown in to a delivery room. By now she was in a lot of pain and very tearful. This was her first child and she's only 20.
After examination she was 5cm dilated. Myself and OH popped out and came back. we were told that nothing would happen until morning and so she would be going on to a delivery suite ward til then. Obviously we knew that we would have to go then.
What took us by total surprise was that her partner was told that he would have to go too!! By now she was already very distressed ,scared, very upset and in pain. To then be told that everyone had to go was unbelievable.
I myself am due in July and it would have never entered my mind that my partner would have to go and i'd be without anyone close with me. I find this policy quite ridiculous.
He does not drive and had to rely on us to be able to get him there when needed. The journey to hospital is 30 minutes. Surely having him there to just sit by the bed to comfort and reassure her was not too much too ask. He wouldn't be making anymore noise than she was!
Finally, two hours after getting home he got the call to return at 11pm. Their baby was born at 3.18am. Bearing in mind that there is no public transport until morning he was then told he would have to leave at 5am where he sat for 45 mins waiting for a lift home.
Is it just me that finds this really surprising. I've always assumed that your partner is there with you from beginning to end for support and encouragement etc.
Does anyone else find this totally out of order or r u already aware of this happening??
Would be interested to hear from anyone please.
Jules.
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Replies
In my case though, I don't mind so much if my oh is sent home - I'm being induced Wednesday and if it takes ages then I'll worry about my oh being bored. He wouldnt be, but I get really funny about things like that.
I DID GET MOVED TO LABOUR SUITE WHEN I WAS 5CM WHERE I WAS ALLOWED SOMEONE WITH ME.
IT REALLY SURPRISES ME SHE WOULDNT GO TO LABOUR WARD AT 5CM, THAT IS DEFINITELY PAST ESTABLISHED LABOUR!
MAYBE THERE WERE NO ROOMS AVAILABLE IN LABOUR WARD? BUT IN ANY CASE THAT IS TERRIBLE!!
that is terrible, how can they leave some one whos in pain by themself's , whats the point of having a birthing partner if their only there at the end bit, thought the whole point was for them to be there thru out to support you . if they do this to me ill be going home , id have to discharge myself because i hate hospitals as it is and the thought of being by myself and in pain and OH not there would be un thinkable
Donna 39+6
After that they took it away (much to my disgust), apparently its so you can concentrate on pushing, which you wouldn't if you were concentrating on breathing or something like that.
Its got nothing to do with how the midwives think you are doing ~ its standard practice.
I had it back though when they were stitching me up afterwards!
Take care
Charlotte
34+1
For these reasons I would have loved a homebirth but live so far away from hospitals and up a narrow/long flight of steps that I have compromised and am going to a birthing centre. Really hope I don;t have this terrible experience. I really feel for you.
I didnt get my gas and air taken away all all and i think i sat it down once lo was born. I was in a midwife unit though where they incourage you to follow your own instinct and do what you think is right, they dont tell you when to push or what position to be in etc, i think all hospitals should be like this. x
that is awful, I just assumed once you were in hospital, you stayed in the delivery suite until after baby was born, I had only just heard about partners being sent home after baby being born and that has upset me. To think that my husband will be leaving me while I'm in pain and need him has just made the whole thing seem like a big nightmare. I ideally wanted a home birth as it was but as i live 30 mins from hospital and am under consultant care that's out the question.
Yet another complete NHS farce!
Em x
It's very scary when you don't know what to expect and you worry that you will give birth during the night and your hubby won't make it back in time! xx
xxx