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18 weeks and have just left cheating husband

Hi hun, i can relate in some ways but not in others... I too became a single parent very early on in my pregnancy. The pregnancy wasnt planned and my bf became very aggressive and nasty towards me. I must say sometimes it can be hard being a single parent but also very rewarding at the same time. If you close to your parents they are the BEST things you could ever have once you have a baby. Mine were my rock and I couldnt do it without them. Once you move back to your home town i think youll be alot happier and its a fresh start! Good luck! x

Replies

  • Hello

    Thank you for your positive message. It's reassuring to hear from a single Mum who has been through the mill too! My Mum and Dad are lovely. I am taking out a lot of my stresses on Mum, snapping at her and just being mean. Then feeling very guilty, which is an extra stress I really dont need. I feel like I am always apologising. But I love her to pieces and she to is my rock. I desperately want to be a great Mum and know I must stay strong. I just wish I was in my new home now. Does your ex see the baby? xx xx Sending best wishes to you and your babs
  • Im sure your mum understands why you snap and being a bit short tempered, after all your not going to be the most happiest, up beat person at the moment are you! My son doesnt see his dad and I get no maintenance either. Whenever he did see him it all ende dup in arguements and he would never do anything for HIS OWN son! I did meantion to him about a contact centre that way there would be no arguments between us and his exacts words were "fuck off im not interested" so that was the last straw for me. I think as long as your baby has all the love from your family then nothing else matters! Im sure youll be a great mum and i know this sounds a bit bizarre but youll be better off being a single parent nowbefore your baby is born rather then once your baby has arrived! Like me youllhave time to come round to the idea and it is easier that way image xx
  • Hi i spilt with my babies dad when i was 3mths pregnant,we did reconcile once baby was born because i had foolishly hoped he would grow up and put others first now he was a dad!i half believed his promises but a month down the line i realised he would never change and we were simply no good together!!
    It was hard both before i had my son and then after,i hated being totally alone,as this is how you naturally feel,i just wanted the family i had dreamed of,but soon came to terms with things the way they were..i agree with Sammy,it is easier spiltting before baby is born,gives you the time to come to terms with everything,and you arent suddenly on your own!!
    I dont regret anything now,im so happy with my little man,i can only imagine how much harder it would of been if we had tried to stay together...
    My sons dad sees him once a week at his parents house,me and him have no contact,i havent spoken or seen him since my son was 2mths old,hes 13mths now!!!Has my ex isnt working i get no payments from him and this helps sum him up in my eyes and makes me heave a big sigh of relief im no longer with him!lol
    Things will be hard at first,and its great you have your parents,my mum has been excellent,watches my son whilst i go out to work,nights out ect....couldnt do it without her,she was even at the birth!!but like me and lots of others out there you will cope and come to think that things are probably better the way they now are!
    Someone who disrespected you the way your ex did is best out of your life,you will move on in time and meet someone who deserves you and your baby(as i now have!!)
    I can also relate about snapping at your mum,when i was pregnant i was a nightmare to her,but luckily she understood and didnt take it to heart,just like your mum will!its only understandable that you feel like you do,and we always take it out on those closest to us!
    Take care,all the best,things will work out for you.....never seems it at the time but it always does!x
  • hi hun my hubby had an affair but i have 2 children a 2 year old son and a 11 month old daughter his affair started when my daughter was 8 months old he is now living with this person and are expecting there own baby.im still trying to cope on my own cos 1 minute there is 2 of us and now im on my own but the kids are worth it xx
  • yeah wel got dumped by my partner 4months ago after bin 2gether 4 4yrs n we have a 21 month old little girl and a week old baby girl. found out he was cheatin on me 4 months ago and moved in with her immediately n r gettin married in december n r also expectin thier little baby early next year n doesn care bout his kids nemore. i cried myself to labour but now realise he aint worth it as long as i'v got my 2 angels i dont need him n wanna bring them up d way i was raised in church, thank God i'v got my mum, sis n bro (my dads late). we all think men r evil but we women r worse cos his got a problem alrit but how can a woman be happy 2 break a happy home n take a father from his kids n think givin him a kid n a home wil make nethin beta. wot goes around wil surely come around, planned n paid 4 a weddin next summer. was suppos 2 get married dis summer but found out i was pregnant so moved d dates, imagin havin 2 cal up every1 who got invited a 2nd time but dis time d weddin is bin cancelled. life goes on n even beta 4 my daughters sake. i'l say take ur time make careful decisions n don rush in2 netin jus cos u r lonely all u need rite now is 2 heal from ur wound n focus on urself n ur baby, it'l wil get beta trust me if u r a christian pray n if u r not speak 2 God d best way u can he can hear u n always makes things beta.
  • Hello Brianna

    Yes, I am a christian and was also brought up in church. My faith makes me a stronger person.

    However, sadly I haven't been too strong on this occasion. After things calmed down my husband and I patched things up... to cut a long story short time wasn't on our side and he has been deployed (he is in the military).

    I was sorry to hear the horror you have been through and can only imagine the hurt you have felt. My husband was married previously and he admitted to have cheated on her (never with me though, I met him months after they seperated), therefore maybe I should have known better. I just always thought he adored me. There were no warning signs. Sounds to me like your ex is rushing into things with this other women, and sadly 9/10 this ends in heartbreak!

    Being a single Mum never worries me. I am confident of my ability - having worked with children, studied childcare and having so desperately longed for a child. However being without him scares me. A failed marriage...

    As he is away, I've had time to reflect and slowly the heartache is going and I am starting to remember all the special reasons why I married him in the first place. When you have decided there is only one man for you, for the rest of your life... it's strange when that falls to pieces... completely out of your control. I have bad days, when I seriously worry about life when he returns. All I have ever wanted is a special, wonderful family.

    Only time will tell what will happen. Maybe we can be strong and get through this? Maybe he'll let me down again? But I now feel prepared for the worse. Which I never was before.

    I hope you find love again soon

    xx
  • thanx rachel, am stil very hurt by d whol tin n always hop thins wil chang lik him cumin bac 2 his senses n al but wel i'v always longd 4 d family lif as wel but neway i no God is in control n wish u luck in makin d best decision.
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