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due date today and made to feel really angry and upset :(:(
okay so i had my midwife appointment with the other midwife who works at clinic (as mine is off on holiddays !!!!!!!!!!!)
who was such a 13itch to me,totally looked down her nose at me and my boyfriend, who she wouldnt even give eye contact, she was talking to me like you would a ten year old. SO PATRONISING, LAST TIME I SAW HER SHE MADE ME FEEL POOP AFTER APPOINTMENT BECAUSE I SAID I COULDNT breastfeed for a medical condition. but yet agen ive left feeling very angry and dissappointed in the care i have recieved. she basicaly said to me that the head isnt even engaged yet so i wont have her until at least a weeks time, so i have an appointmnet for 2nd or 3rd october to talk about sweep which apprently only works for 13 percent of woman. but i dont even have to go for appointment, basically she sounded like she wasnt bothered weather i showed up for it or not. i have NOT had any information given to me on what to expect, birthing positions or what type of birth i want!!!!!
i may be 18 but dont i deserve the same respect a woman older then me would get. it so unfair, i dont think i would ever reccomended the community midwife , grrrrrh.
so i am now feeling like baby will never come, have no clue on birthing positions, never got to say what type of birth i wanted
susan 40 weeks with pink bump xx x x xx x
who was such a 13itch to me,totally looked down her nose at me and my boyfriend, who she wouldnt even give eye contact, she was talking to me like you would a ten year old. SO PATRONISING, LAST TIME I SAW HER SHE MADE ME FEEL POOP AFTER APPOINTMENT BECAUSE I SAID I COULDNT breastfeed for a medical condition. but yet agen ive left feeling very angry and dissappointed in the care i have recieved. she basicaly said to me that the head isnt even engaged yet so i wont have her until at least a weeks time, so i have an appointmnet for 2nd or 3rd october to talk about sweep which apprently only works for 13 percent of woman. but i dont even have to go for appointment, basically she sounded like she wasnt bothered weather i showed up for it or not. i have NOT had any information given to me on what to expect, birthing positions or what type of birth i want!!!!!
i may be 18 but dont i deserve the same respect a woman older then me would get. it so unfair, i dont think i would ever reccomended the community midwife , grrrrrh.
so i am now feeling like baby will never come, have no clue on birthing positions, never got to say what type of birth i wanted
susan 40 weeks with pink bump xx x x xx x
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Replies
I just saw this on thelist of forums so have jumped over from 'baby'. I remember what it felt like to be overdue and fed up wanting the baby to come and the midwife not eing bothered at all about how I was feeling (very swollen, hot, tired, emotional.) She should not have treated you like that at all.
As for birthing positions etc I got that from reading magazines, perhaps do some research. Did you have any antenatal classes? I can see you're a newbie on here - do ask others for advice - your likely to get a good and quick reply.
As for the sweep appointment, is this at your local hosp? My experience was that I was booked at the hospital for a sweep but when I got there it was an 'overdue clinic'. It was up to me whether I wanted to have the sweep or not but it was also a check up. I also got the date for my induction at that appointment.
Is there a section in your notes for a birth plan? I filled that in and the midwifes at the hospital followed it as much as they could, I was pleased that they had taken notice of the fact I had written I wnted to have my baby layed on my tummy after delivery even though I had to have my baby delivered in theatre and just wanted the baby to be safe at that point!
Your baby will come, you will be offered to be induced so that you do not go more than 14 days past your due date.
You definatly should have been treated with respect, I didn't like one of the midwives I saw because she was always so rushed and didn't explain enough to me. Try to just ignore her and work on all the natural ways to induce birth - I was told that being upright and being active can help to engage the baby's head.
I'm due around the 13th of next month.
I know it's still quite early but my baby is head down and not engaged, when i had a home visit from my midwife i asked what happens if the head doesn't engage, she said that it doesn't matter to much as the contractions will push the baby down into the pelvis.
I hope all goes well
Fern
xxxx
hiya thankyou for your support i appreciate it, i just feel a bit gutted that there is no sign of labour approaching, it feels like xmas morning when you wake up and no presents are there lol
but like you one of you said baby will come soon enough, i just have to find that little bit more energy to be patient.
i didnt attend antenatal classes, i wasnt informed of any available, so the information i recieve at the moment is valuable to me
as for sweep appointment, it was said that it would be done at the clinic i have been going to. i have seen a section for the birth plan and will give it a go filling it out as best as i can.
what sort of natural ways would reccomend that actually worked?xxxx
Labour and birth plans........best advice, stay as flexible and open as possible but make notes and talk with ur birth partner (ur boyfriend or mum etc) to make sure they know what u want or don't want or what u are open to suggestions for.....their support will be invaluable, especially if ur get asked something and a contraction hits!! Do u know what sorts of pain relief is available etc???
Stay as mobile as u can, walk or pace, leaning over slightly using a chair or bed for support and rocking side to side in the early stages can help. Oh, and don't forget to breathe!!!!! Slow deep breaths with a contraction does help.
I'm 40+3 my baby's is'nt engaged yet either , it's sitting right at the top of it .The midwife examined me the other day , she said she was going to sweep the membranes . She could'nt get to where the baby's head was , it was quite uncomfortable for me and she stopped . I felt a bit discomfort after it , that was 3 days ago and nothings happened . I'm going to be induced next week if nothings happened. Hope this does'nt put you off , it might work for you .
I had to go and see a different midwife when mines was on holiday , i had to go and see one to get my BP checked as i had been atending day assesment . I could'nt even get an appointment at my local surgery , had to go to a smaller hozie near by . As for the midwife she was hopeless she had put that the head had engaged , but my midwife the next week said it had'nt . I would't worry about it too much , tell your midwife how felt if you are comfortable with it .
Yvonne
so i think that one is outta question!
hot or spicy foods is a big no no for me as i suffer from large gallstones so i dont want to have another attack :S
so whats left is sex, but like i think it comes down to baby coming in her own time
thanks hun xx
go with the flow in labour, if you want pain relieve go for it, you dont get a medal for bravery but if you want a natural birth, my advice would be to let your birthing partner know as he/she can keep reasurring you and tell the midwife at the time what you want (you will be more concerntrating on other things,lol)
use the page on the boots website for what to pack in your hospital bag for you and baby. when you go into labour, if in dout you can always phone the labour ward instead of the midwife you dont seemt to get along with and they will help you.
good luck and rememeber to post a birth story after you have your little girl xx
i tihkn it will be a real shock when it actually happens coz at mo i feel like my turn will never get here lol
the midwife i saw today was clearly pre judging me which is a shame some people have a small minded world!
i mean she talked to me like i was a ten yr old sayin wen shall i wave my maical wand for baby to come and she didnt even give stu my partner eye contact, n kept starin thru me.
xxxx
Try and relax, she will come as soon as shes ready- get plenty of rest in preparation, walking and being moderately active when your up and about should help ease her deeper into the pelvis.
When contractions do start, i found walking around and leaning against my partner for a back rub helped! The bath was also a godsend lol
As for the birth- open mindedness is the key. Go in not knowing what pain relief you want (if any), and just take it step by step. The good thing is if ones to weak you can try others, so i had a shot of pethidine which made me personally quite sick but my friend said it was fab. When i couldn't cope any longer the epidural was my godsend so everyone is totally different. Older or younger we deserve the same respect and choices- pregnancy isn't easy and bitches like that don;t help!! Keep me posted huni xxxx
i think i feel a lot more calmer now and will try and relax, i know i will do the best when the time comes
just so excited and wondering when it will be xxx
I'd second going in with a open mind, I didn't write a birth plan, just went with the flow although I'd always said I didn't want epidural and ended up begging for one. Didn't get it in the end as baby arrived too quickly and no time for anaesthetist to come and do it. It's easier said than done, but try not to worry as you go through it as fear makes pain worse. Gas and air is wonderful stuff, like being drunk but no hangover!!
Good luck, hope your baby arrives soon
Corinna x
im gonna go with the flow and listen to my body when labour finally begins.
its so nice to have supportive advice. send me labour vibes lol
coz i cant wait to meet this little lady xxxxx
People keep telling me to do things to get it going aswell , spicy food i get bad heartburn with , a long walk i can hardly move either and today my back is killing me , sore when i stand or walk . As for the sex bit , i think my husband is a bit scared and to be honest very uncomfy . Apparently pineapple can work to , i think if it's going t come out it will . Good luck
Yvonne 40+4
Even now that im 25 i still get weird attitudes from some of the staff at the health center when i go in for my check ups thankfully so far i have only had my booking in apointment and two other apointments and im 32 weeks today x
i may be 18 but dont i deserve the same respect a woman older then me would get. it so unfair,
of course you do hun please complain to the head of midwifery no one should be left upset by their midwife!!! as for birthing positions etc google birthing positions pain relief etc and try to book to see ur regular mw or at least phone her. i hope you get this sorted young mums r no less important than older ones and are just as good as anyone else xxxxxxxx
susan 40 weeks with pink bump xx x x xx x
Good Luck