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Who's Married?

To marry or not to marry that is the question!

I suspect my oh is thinking about proposing to me...to tell you the truth instead of feeling happy and excited it makes me feel sick and nervous! I don't know why, we've been together for over 4 years, but the thought of marriage turns me into a wreck.

Is marriage a good idea, or not????

xoxoxox
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Replies

  • I'm married. Didn't feel it made much of a difference to be honest as he wasnt going to escape me, lol. The only difference I found was abroad really which sounds weird. The wedding was nerve wracking and I nearly fainted, but I love my hubby very much and he is well worth it! What makes you nervous about it? It does seem a big step. xxx
  • I can't put my finger on it. It's feeling like I will be tied to this person forever and having to put up with his annoying habits etc, I have annoying ones too like 'nagging' apparently! I is such a huge step tho...
  • That's another thing, not having my own name anymore, it's like I'm 'owned' by him lol
  • I've been married since May 2004 - and I love it!
    I started seeing oh in 1997 so I had a long wait for him to propose but he finally did.

    You have to follow your heart if he asks you. What makes you so nervous? My sister has 2 lo's with her oh - they are engaged now but no immediate plans to get married.
  • Lol, i'm a nag too. (But if only he picked up after himself I wouldnt have to! Lol) Yeah, see I used to just think marriage was just abit of paper like a legal document tying you to someone so didnt see the point. I just like us all having the same surname, even though nobody ever spells it right. But if you know you want to be with him forever it seems the natural step. Plus you get to go to wedding fayres and samle lots of cake without having the intentions of buying it, hehe. We did registry office then straight to London in a limo as didnt want to give some of my enormous family free food and drink and the excuse to have a row. We were going to go to Lapland for the wedding but hubbys parents got abit funny. His mum got funny anyway as she wanted us to do it in a hotel with a huge meal and posh do, with us paying the bill of course, xxx
  • I'm married! It didn't change our relationship - and I love been 'Mrs'. I don't want to be rude - but surely having children together ties you together just as much as getting married would?
  • lol - how did he give you the ring. My oh is useless at things like that! I think he'd pick a nice ring, but he's propose in the most ridiculous manner! Or maybe I am underestimating him. It's just that he has never been very good at planning things at all!!!!
  • Having kids does tie you together, but I can still escape if I wanted to lol...I keep talking about escaping like he's such a bad person, but he's a good guy really xx
  • Hi

    I am married, it will be 2 years in April, and we have been together 5 years. We had a small wedding too (only 20 people), Register Office (with a beach setting behind the building) then to a local hotel for the reception. I love being married.

    Septembermama
  • I'm married and it hasn't made a bit of difference to our relationship. We only did it really because we wanted to make a public statement of committment to each other (and we could finally afford it!). I haven't changed my name though and don't intend to. It means Aoife has a different surname to me but I don't mind that one bit!

    Even if he does propose there's no need to rush into the actual marriage though. We were together for 16 years before we got married, we not ones to rush into things image
  • I got my wedding all booked for 7th March and I cant wait to be honest.

    I dont really feel like it's such a big step though as we already live together, just feel like it will complete us really, had our little girl nine days ago and registered her on friday and I dont like that we haven't all got the same name at the mo. only 3 and a half months to go though.
  • it funny how we see things differently. I married my hubby 8 1/2 years ago and I didn't bat an eyelid when he asked me (we've been together 16years) but when I found out I was pregnant in 2007 that scared the hell out of me. As i see having a child together as more of a bond than marraige. When I was just married I could have just walked away when I want and there'd be no ties but now with lo i'm tied to him forever, if we stay together or not!

    I love being a "proper" married family now tho, I feel so much more secure

    Do what your heart tells you.....but honesty that ring doesn't make that much difference apart from a bit of a tax break!!
    xx
  • Message withdrawn at poster's request.

  • I am married and love it but I have to admit I was married before and it felt wrong from the moment we got together until we split 4-5 yrs later and I still went ahead with the wedding for all the wrong reasons.
    Now I can see what it's all about I'd only say go for it if you are 100% sure and can't imagine living without them.
  • I'm not married, but we have been together for over 12 years! I've been with him since I was 16!

    I just don't feel the need to get married.
  • I'm married. We got together in April 06, got engaged in August 06 (although we'd been talking about getting married from practically the beginning), had m/c in Oct 06, got married Sept 07 and Cole was born Dec 07. We don't hang around really! lol!

    I don't think that getting married has made a difference to our relationship - in fact having a child made more of a difference as nothing really changed after the wedding. I was never bothered about getting married before (and i was with my ex 7 1/2 years) but with hubby it just felt right, and it made us more of a family.

    The name change is ap ain in the arse though - having to get everything changed - still haven't and we've been married over a year! I'm not that bothered about being a mrs or having the same name as hubby the way a lot of people do like that but i think it does make life easier for us all to have the same name. Personally I'd have been happy to keep my name but it meant a lot to my hubby to have me take his name so I did.
  • Yes, we've been married for 6.5 years now, oh I feel old! We've been together since we were both 16, that's 15.5 years now, so we took a while to actually get married! I loved the day and would recommend it if you have no doubts in your mind!?
  • Hey, I'm not married. I've been engaged for oooh... 2 years..? maybe? i think! Lol. OH and his family wanted us to get married asap before Harry was born but i didn't see the necessity in it as we were planning on staying together anyways (hence the engagement) and i didn't want to rush anything anyway.

    I don't think it'd change alot apart from the number on your bank statement afterwards! Lol xxxx
  • lol whalemummy. I've been married for 5 years now and i always tell people that it is just the same as being not married except we have more plates!!
  • I'm married. Me and oh have been together 8 years, married for 2. I love being married and the whole proces of organising the wedding, the anticipation etc did make us feel very close, like no one else in the world but each other understood how we felt. It was the same when I was pregnant with Lo.

    We had a low key wedding, registry office followed by recpetion at our local village hall (conveniently a converted barn!). A beautiful honeymoon. I didnt know where we we're going and throughout the while trip oh left envelopes hidden for me letting me know what to pack and where we might be going (found one behind aeroplane lap tray, one under my sunbed towel and even one waiting for us when we got down to breakfast at a hotel one morning, there was 11 in all, very romantic)

    As far as NAGGING is oncerned though. I always say we only have to ask them to do stuff because they just dont "see" what needs doing themselves (ie, the bin overflowing or the dishwasher being empty but cups going on the side!). And nagging is just us asking them repeatedly. Well, if they did it the 1st time we wouldnt have to go on would we!!
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