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Anyone else have a LO but still live at home??
I know there are a few girls on here - how do you find it?
We live with the inlaws and it's really getting me down at the mo. They are really nice people and very helpful with Gabe but they do my head in sometimes. It doesn't help that my mil works from home, and fil is out of work, so they are there day in day out. Me & OH are still a young couple (20 & 22) and we need time on our own! Last night the pil's went out, great I thought, but then my OH little bro (16) decided to hang round with us all night. :roll:
I feel like they are constantly analysing the way I am with Gabe. I know they're not, but that's what it feels like. It doesn't help that OH and mil have fallen out about how much money we are giving her for rent (he thinks it's too much).
I just want to scream sometimes. What makes me even madder is that we can afford to rent, but OH won't! He says it's throwing money away, and he wants to wait until I'm 21 (in June next year) because my nan left me a lot of money which I will get then, so we can put a good deposit down on a house. I can't live here till June!!!!! Gabe will be 13 months by then and he'll still be in our room. He could do with being in his own room as it is (he's 7 months).
Sorry for the rant xx
We live with the inlaws and it's really getting me down at the mo. They are really nice people and very helpful with Gabe but they do my head in sometimes. It doesn't help that my mil works from home, and fil is out of work, so they are there day in day out. Me & OH are still a young couple (20 & 22) and we need time on our own! Last night the pil's went out, great I thought, but then my OH little bro (16) decided to hang round with us all night. :roll:
I feel like they are constantly analysing the way I am with Gabe. I know they're not, but that's what it feels like. It doesn't help that OH and mil have fallen out about how much money we are giving her for rent (he thinks it's too much).
I just want to scream sometimes. What makes me even madder is that we can afford to rent, but OH won't! He says it's throwing money away, and he wants to wait until I'm 21 (in June next year) because my nan left me a lot of money which I will get then, so we can put a good deposit down on a house. I can't live here till June!!!!! Gabe will be 13 months by then and he'll still be in our room. He could do with being in his own room as it is (he's 7 months).
Sorry for the rant xx
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Replies
When we moved from england back to scotland we had a friend stay with us for a few weeks and it drove me fucking mad, the same when martins nephew stayed for a few weeks when he moved to glasgow to work me and martin almost split up as things built up over the weeks and as soon as he moved out the shouting started as any problems we had over the weeks couldnt be delt with as there was always someone else around and his nephew always butted in and gave his views on everything.
Your right about the wee man needing to be in his own room, he should have been in there at around 6 months, and the longer he is in your room the harder it will be to move him into his own room.
The other big thing is she is in my bedroom & as soon as I make a noise she's awake & looking at me whereas if she were in her own room she'd be fine. I sympathise with you totally.... xx
We live a 20min drive away from them at the mo, and I'd like to be nearer, plus our neighbours are a nightmare with loud music etc.
My dad is going to work in Dubai in January, so it will be my mum, younger brother who is 16 and younger sister who is 10 at home. They have offered us their bedroom with ensuite bathroom, and its the size of our house downstairs so lots of space.
I'm looking forward to having a babysitter on demand, and not having to juggle so much housework. But I have accepted that it's going to be difficult at times, especially with my siblings, their so noisy! I'm also dreading sharing the kitchen, as I'm really fussy when it comes to cleanliness, and my mum isn't as bothered if the fridge or cooker is pristine.
But we'll be able to save ??1000 a month, so thats a big incentive for us to at least stick it out for 6 months.
I would say if you can afford to rent until you can buy a house, then tell your OH how you feel.
I know how u feel, im 20 and live at home with my parents at the min, cos i just ant afford to move out with my boyfriend and LO. Im at uni and my bf works so we cant rely on one wage. Im grateful for the help but feel like i am gettin anylised all the time!! good topic xxx
Yesterday was the worst. The footie was on TV (our team doesnt usually get on telly lol), and OH great uncle was coming round. For some reason every time he comes round, Mil goes mad - she cleans the place from top to bottom (its always clean as it is!), does a buffet, and moves ALL Gabe's stuff into our room(which is titchy). If I even leave so much as a rattle out, she gets twitchy. I have no idea why cos this guy is over 70 and according to my oh his house is filthy! So anyway, I can't do anything with Gabe as she wont have his toys around or play mat on the floor. So I either have to sit there with him on my lap for 1 1/2 hours and have him bored or play with him in my room....and she has blocked the access to our bed with Gabe's cradle swing and stuff so I have nowhere to play with him. Seriously it did my head in.
Naz, I totally agree about the renting - however I have spoke to my OH about this countless times and he wont change his mind! xxx
[Modified by: ~yummy_mummy~ on December 07, 2008 09:10 PM]
Believe me I have spoke to him about this a million times and I never get through. I can't even moan about living here cos he just says 'yeah its crap but we haven't got a choice' which is BS! He isn't on a low income at all, so we DO have a choice...but he would rather live at home with no privacy and his parents in 24/7 (seriously, they are) then ditch his pride and rent for a few months!!!!!!!
Sorry this has turned into a mini rant! I'm in a mood with him as it is for other reasons.
1) I c his view, in that if you wait until you are 21 house prices are still dropping.
2) theres also the option for shared ownership if he doesnt want to rent. My friend is buying a house for 25% and the money rent/morgage works out gd.
3)I would write him a letter stating how you feel. Sometimes it works loads better...Just like when someone recently posted and email to their oh and got a gd reaction. I wud be fuming to if he spent nearly ??800 on a new engine.
4) have you been putting money into a seperate account to put towards a house?
re mil...kinda taking piss really, I wonder how she is really thinking.
U dont have to answer this...but do you get an couple time in bed together?! It almost sounds as though she has laid down rules in her mind but not told them to you!
Chin up hun...I hope you enjoy your 1st Christmas with your lol! xxx
[Modified by: Joey08 on December 08, 2008 05:42 PM]
No matter how many people said 'oh just think about the money you can save' it still got to me so much that i ended up on anti-depressents!
But now we have our own place i can kind of see where everyone was comming from, we managed to save up quite a bit of money and if it wasnt for mil then we wouldn't of been able to.
If you can i would really try and stick it out for another 6months, but I would set up a direct debit for as much as you can afford each month so that you can see the money mounting up. This will help you get through the next 6months when you know the money is going to go towards your future.
I hope it all works out for you xvx
Basically when Gabe goes down for a nap we just go & do it...Mil probably knows - in fact undoubtedly does - but we're past caring. I dont think anyone minds anyway. I know some people may find that gross especially as our bedroom is a garage conversion so is downstairs BUT we kinda past caring...and sex is one of the best bits of our relationship.
We are already saving money & have been for a while...try to save about ??500 a month but it doesnt often happen as OH can be a bit of a big spender!!! xx
On the up side it was really helpful to have them helpin in the early days as oh works long hours and i was in quite a lot of pain for quite a while.
Nice to know i'm not the only one in this situation!
Does ur oh not think givin money to his mum is throwin money away same as renting?
xxx