Stay at home mummy with one baby?

tamarabell · Dec 9, 2008 6:15PM

Hi All. I was wondering if anyone on here is a stay at home mum with one baby?
The reason I ask is that I would rather stay at home with ashton then go back to work in March but I am panicing that we won;t be able to afford it. How does everyone else manage and what help do you get?

One of the reasons I don't want to go back is that he has cows milk protien intolorance and I would rather be the one making all his meals so that there is no risk to him and also as I have to travel to work it would mean leaving the house with him at 7.45am and not getting home till 18.30 - so when would I see him and spend time with him?
Plus the fact childcare is so expensive!
Thanks Tammi & ashton xxxx

Hannahmummyto2 · Dec 9, 2008 10:16AM

im a stay at home mummy to tegan, i was all set for going back to work but they changed my work dept etc so in the end when it came to the day i was meant to go back, i was in tears because i couldnt leave her. its hard financially but to be making more money that what we get in tax credits i would have to be working full time and even then it was only ??45 a week more by time i paid for childcare (and we only get ??40 tax creds a wk) so for me it wasnt worth it.
now that im not working, we just dont spend as much on luxeries and food shopping and we budget alot.

hope this helps xxx

EnglebertW_nkface · Dec 9, 2008 10:19AM

I was a stay at home mum with Millie so I only used to have one. It wouldn't have made much sense for me to go back, I didn't earn a huge amount so by the time we'd paid for child care (no family local) we wouldn't have been much better off. It would have been very difficult to organise as well as both oh and me worked in retail (he still does) so we never had the same days off from one week to the next.
We were fortunate in that we didn't really have a mortgage (oh'd dad died while I was pregnant and left him some money) or any other loans to pay so we were able to manage on one salary. Now we have two we do have a bigger mortgage as we moved but we still just about manage, although I did downsize my car earlier in the year to save a bit on the running costs.
xx

upsydaisy · Dec 9, 2008 10:21AM

im a stay at home mummy to brooke, cant afford it really but we get by, we have no 2 on the way, i have always said i wont put my kids in to child care and wont return to work till they start nursery, i could work eveings but then im selfish and i like me time and my pesonal time with my hubby!! we get bugger all in child tax credits and hubby isnt entitled to working family tax credits coz he earns to much! pah! is all i say to that!!

u just learn to budget a bit more and plan things better like food shopping etc! its a decision u and ur partner need to make and if u chose not to go back u will just cope!

xx

maxnjacksmummy · Dec 9, 2008 10:23AM

Hi there

Totally understand why you want to stay at home with your lo. I went back to work 2 days a week and finances were still tight so I started doing Usborne books from home on some of my other days with my lo with me. It is FANTASTIC and I am hoping that within 6 months I will be able to give up my 2 days at work and work with lo alongside just doing the books. Have you considered something like this??? If you want some info just email me; books@the-mountfords.co.uk - even if you want to know about it for the future just drop me a line!

LittleChickpea · Dec 9, 2008 10:24AM

Hello there! I am a full time mummy to Eoin who is 13 months. I am looking for work... Its just hard because want my mum to care for Eoin while I work, and she can only do mornings so trying to find something with suitable hours. But I am happy taking my time as I love being with LO full time! At the moment my partner works 40 hrs a week and recieves Tax credits as he is on a low income.. We pay full bills and full council tax which is ??126 a month! But we do get help from the council with our rent, We rent privately which is ??825 a month (2 bed flat) and the council give us ??70 a week towards that. We are not 'loaded', but we are not struggling either. LO gets everything he needs, and we have spending money too. Sometimes things get a bit tight, especially now, round Christmas but we are coping just fine. xxxx Its funny because I want to work about 10 hours a week.... So say I brought home ??80 a week, then the housing benefit would stop and we'd have the exact same income as normal! However, I do not want to keep claimimg housing benefit for too long, so we will see xxx

karen130770 · Dec 9, 2008 10:26AM

hi hon, althoug Ive obviously got other kids, Reiss isthe only one at home an we a=have only one wage. Like the others have said, cutting back is our way of coping, We dont often go out, I dont buy new clothes often and I limit the food shopping. I also walk virtually everywhere to save on petrol. Mind the last ones prob not poss for you in the outer hebrides!xx

tamarabell · Dec 9, 2008 10:30AM

Hi girls thanks for the replies!!! Kerry we are like you no family near us to help so he will have to go to nusery whilst I work.
Craftycharlie I already work for Usborne books! To be honest although I love the books there is another woman that has been doing it for years round here so although she is always busy it hasn't really worked for me!
At the mintue as well we live in the middle of nowhere so getting a wee part time job in asda or tesco is not an option at its a 20 mile trip there and back plus hubby isn't home till 6.30 then has to have a bath as he is a tyre fitter so is always dirty when he gets home so wouldn't be able to work till about 7.30/8pm!!! God why is life so hard?

Does anyone know what you have to be earning under to get working tax credits?
xxxxxxx

upsydaisy · Dec 9, 2008 10:32AM

i think its under 15,000 joint income,,,, its a really low threshold i tink personally!

tamarabell · Dec 9, 2008 10:33AM

God thats stupid!!!! Hubby earns just over that IF he gets his bonus!!!!! You would think there was more help available!
LOL Karen not quite the outter hebrides!!! xxxx

upsydaisy · Dec 9, 2008 10:39AM

https://www.taxcredits.inlandrevenue.gov.uk/Qualify/DIQHousehold.aspx

this is a really good link! u can play about and see if u wud be better off going back or staying home etc!

Joey0810 · Dec 9, 2008 10:46AM

Hello, my lo 9 7mths, and I should be returning to work in feb. However, for even if I did 12hr shifts, it means leaving home at 615, and returning at about 945 as I work in a hospital. Im thinking of doing something more local such as care work in peoples homes but do agency/relief shifts, so I get to chose when I work.
Slightly different scenario to most people. Hubby is a student until July amd has big exams coming up, so I didnt want to rely on him helping out in theeves when he should be concentrating on revision. I m also thinking of taking up usbourne books too. With hubby being a student we are relying on our savings. We are renting privately and they ahve lowered our rent. Council tax is quite alot, so going to see if we can get help with council tax as its our 2nd big expense after rent. I managed to pay all our bills annually before I went on mat leave which helped. Im not one for claiming benefits but if its will help us over the next couple of months I will claim, knowing full well that once hubby is qualified he will be paying tax anyhow.

Just to say it is possible to live off the minimum. Just have to remember that your child comes first before luxurys. After we got married I couldnt find a job in the area I qualified in and I was bringing home 500 a mth whilst hubby was a student. We manged to scrap by and it meant we didnt buy anything unless it was essential. We have found, having lived off this amount you take less things for granted. We have also found, the more money you ahve the more you spend!

tamara...they also go by 2007-2008 income, so in april they go by 2008-2009 income. My friend applied and they didnt get it. If your partner works, he has to be earning less than 16,000. The coucil have wierd ways of working out who needs money. Im on smp but they still wouldnt let me claim councial tax benefit despite hubby doesnt get anything as a student!

Sry, I ahve gone on abit. I just wanted to say I do feel for you, but you will get by. It just mean being extra carefuly between both you and your poartner what you spend your money on

fatema · Dec 9, 2008 11:14AM

Hi, I'm a stay at home mum too. Amara is now 5wks but i started my career break just before i got pregnant because i really wanted a break from work and as we were ttc i thought i would go back to work after amara is 3months.
it didnt effect us financially as hubby is on a good salary. Now that amara is here, i have decided to stay home and take care of her.
I do feel lucky to have the option as i would find it difficult to leave amara with anyone.
xxx

gsmummy55 · Dec 9, 2008 12:30PM

I am a stay at home mum to Gabe who is 7 months today. I haven't got a job and I really, really don't want one as I want to stop with Gabe and I am really protective and clingy of him (I know it's a bad thing but I still cant accept that he was mine for 9 months and now I have to share him

) as it is...but once we move out I will have to work part time for a bit extra. About 12 hours a week or so.

tamarabell · Dec 9, 2008 4:31PM

Cheers girls gonna pop into the CAB tomorrow and get some advice from them before making decision. xxxx

Bunty1975 · Dec 9, 2008 6:15PM

i am a stay at home with a 3 yr old and twins aged 6 months...
we are just cutting back
i worked til i had the twins... and i'm still making my mind up what to do next.
holidays abroad are easy to lose with a baby...the back garden and a sand pit are all you need!
but we are already finding it hard in terms of food. and with twins you can imagine how much we are spending on nappies!

Stay at home mummy with one baby?

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