Forum home Pregnancy Miscarriage & pregnancy loss

miscarriage-just wanted to ramble on a bit

I have been posting on the pregnancy forum for a little while, about a suspected miscarriage, which was confirmed yesterday. I had my miscarriage at 6 weeks, though i suspect that it atarted at 5. One thing that annoys me is that i found out i was pregnant on christmas eve because i went to the doctor with unbearable back pain, and bad stomach cramps. He did a test to confirm i was pregnant, but did not even mention that i could be miscarrying. I spent the next week getting so excited, as my OH and I have been TTC for over 1 year. Then the inevitable heavy blood loss etc followed after that on new years day.

Even though we only knew for one week, and the pregnancy was still new, I cant believe how upset i am. I am posting here as i have no close friends or family in the same city as me, and i really feel like i need to let it out. I was going to talk to mum, but she said 'oh well, at least it wasnt that old' I can see what she means, but to me, even though it wasnt a fully formed baby, i feel like i have lost my baby. My partner is also upset, but it is difficult to talk fully with him, as he doesnt like to discuss difficult things.

Being logical, i know that it was just one of those things, but i keep wondering why it happened to me. I dont smoke, dont drink alcohol or caffeine, and exercise regularly. Its not fair. I cant really concentrate at work, and i keep thinking about what could have been. I am still bleeding lightly and i hope that stops soon.

I am grateful for the fact that i didnt lose my baby at a later date, like 10 weeks, as some people have here, and for the fact that i had a natural miscarriage and didnt need any medical intervention.

My partner and I are continuing TTC, and i think that i may be pinning to much on conceiving this month, as i heard that you may be more fertile in the following month a miscarriage.

I guess that all us ladies can do who have suffered this, is to keep trying.

If you have made it this far, then thanks for reading

xxxxxxx

Replies

  • Hi, It really broke my heart reading your msg, I think your being really brave about it. I personally have never experienced it, I admire your guts to come on here and talk. I do believe things hapen for a reason and any bad life experiences make you stronger so please don't worry about it and dwell over the why did it happen. Keep positive and keep trying. Its like Charlotte in the "sex in the city" film, it happens for her when she stops trying and stops thinking about it so much.I know its only a film but we like to think it cud happen! Anyway brave girl keep me posted along your journey I'll pray 4 u x (I'm not that religious but it worked for me!):\)
  • Hi LisaLeigh

    Sorry to hear your sad news. I started bleeding at 5 weeks too, but they didn't know I'd miscarried until I was 7+5.

    It's a very difficult time emotionally, you're hormones are all over the place and having been on cloud 9 you've landed with a bit of a bump. Hang in there, it does get easier. And if you need to talk, we're all here for you!

    Hugs! x
  • Hi LisaLeigh,

    You are not alone in how you feel. I miscarried at 5 weeks at the end of November and I can't believe how utterly devasted I felt. My hubbie bottled everything up (as men do!) but I now know how awful he felt.

    I too had only known about a week when I started to miscarry but it doesn't matter how long you have known for. I started looking at prams, we talked about names and we discussed how we were going to tell everyone on Christmas day. You go from a huge high to a terrible low in a very short space of time.

    This forum was great for me. Hubbie and I have started TTC again and that is the one thing that keeps me going.

    Stay on here and talk. All the ladies here know what you have been through.

    C.xx
  • hiya i had a m/c in october at 5 weeks yes it is heartbreaking and we continued to tcc again and in now nearly eight weeks pg and have a scan on friday as i has a m/c im allowed a early scan so yes its highly likely you are more fertile after a m/c i am still worried about the baby i keep checking every time i go to the loo for blood but ill will be well reasured on friday im hoping so good luck in trying its not an easy thing to deal with so please keep your chin up it will happen
  • I had my MC on dec 21st at 7 weeks and I feel much the same way, I know it wasn't a baby as such but to me it was. It will get easier, for me it's the trying again that is helping!

    Hang in there and talk as much as you need we are all here xxx
  • It really is rubbish. I lost mine at 10 weeks back in November and still have bad days. I think until you have been in this position its very difficult to say how you would feel, I never thought I would be this upset so I have taken to ignoring peoples comments about 'it wasn't that big' etc. We have to keep positive as one day we will all be on the pregnancy forum, moaning about our fat ankles and stretch marks, bring it on.....;\)
  • I'm really sorry to hear that you have all experienced mc's .... they are heartbreaking, at any stage of pregnancy. Whether you know at 5 weeks or much later, you have had time to get used the idea of having a baby and its so exciting! I've mc'd 3 times, at various weeks (15 weeks, twins at 13 weeks and 5 weeks), and the best bit of advice my doc gave me was that whilst the statistics of mc is apparantly 1 in 3, that means that 1 in 3 of YOUR pregnancys may not be viable, and not that you are the unlucky 1 of 3 women going through it, and that thought process really helped me ! I am very lucky to have gone ahead and had children after my mc's and am 5 weeks away from baby 3.

    Really send my thoughts and best wishes to you all...and keep trying!

    Nooniem
    xx
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