strange relationship with my OH :(
evening all, this post might end up being long but there is nobody else i can talk to about this, so i hope you can all lend an ear and give me some support as i'm all in a muddle!
A bit of background - Ben and I got together in july '06 so have been together two and a half years - married for the last year and a half of that. It was a whirlwind romance and i fell pregnant with evie two months after ben proposed, we were over the moon.
Ben is my best friend, and i believe he is my soul mate and fate brought us together. I love him dearly and couldn't live without him, he's a fantastic partner and daddy to evie - 13month.
My problem is.... I've began to feel so close to him in a friendly way - we have such a close bond, that it feel REALLY strange kissing him... or sleeping with him. I look at him, and he is GORGEOUS to me, i think he's hot... he has a lovely body and i do fancy him - but i almost feel like he's my gay best friend... or the little lad nextdoor that i've grown up with so it'd be "icky" to sleep with him!
We used to have a fantastic sex life up until i got pregnant - the "honeymoon period" shall we call it, then it dwindled off a little bit.
There isn't anything wrong with my sex drive - i get "the horn" and i can even look at other men and fantasize about them which i know is really naughty. It's just.... it doesn't feel right getting it on with ben. I love kissing, always have - could snog a man for hours, just not ben, anymore. When he tries to get a big snog out of me i honestly feel like i'm kissing my best mate and i feel uncomfortable. So when it comes to sex - no matter how horny i am and how much i try and relax and think of him as my hubby, i don't enjoy it.
Why am i so weird?!? I do love him dearly... and he's hot! so why do i feel like this? I want us to be together for ever... no other man is good enough, but i feel like i want sex with other men instead sometimes just to satisfy my needs.
i've never known anybody else who feels this way... i want my stud back.... not a gay best mate! Anybody in the same boat or got any words of wisdom? It's really starting to get me down.
A bit of background - Ben and I got together in july '06 so have been together two and a half years - married for the last year and a half of that. It was a whirlwind romance and i fell pregnant with evie two months after ben proposed, we were over the moon.
Ben is my best friend, and i believe he is my soul mate and fate brought us together. I love him dearly and couldn't live without him, he's a fantastic partner and daddy to evie - 13month.
My problem is.... I've began to feel so close to him in a friendly way - we have such a close bond, that it feel REALLY strange kissing him... or sleeping with him. I look at him, and he is GORGEOUS to me, i think he's hot... he has a lovely body and i do fancy him - but i almost feel like he's my gay best friend... or the little lad nextdoor that i've grown up with so it'd be "icky" to sleep with him!
We used to have a fantastic sex life up until i got pregnant - the "honeymoon period" shall we call it, then it dwindled off a little bit.
There isn't anything wrong with my sex drive - i get "the horn" and i can even look at other men and fantasize about them which i know is really naughty. It's just.... it doesn't feel right getting it on with ben. I love kissing, always have - could snog a man for hours, just not ben, anymore. When he tries to get a big snog out of me i honestly feel like i'm kissing my best mate and i feel uncomfortable. So when it comes to sex - no matter how horny i am and how much i try and relax and think of him as my hubby, i don't enjoy it.
Why am i so weird?!? I do love him dearly... and he's hot! so why do i feel like this? I want us to be together for ever... no other man is good enough, but i feel like i want sex with other men instead sometimes just to satisfy my needs.
i've never known anybody else who feels this way... i want my stud back.... not a gay best mate! Anybody in the same boat or got any words of wisdom? It's really starting to get me down.
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xxx
[Modified by: Mum to 1 on January 11, 2009 02:11 PM]
Sent you a message on the trying for baby forum.
lilou x