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Ditch the baby monitor?

My oh wants us to stop using the baby monitor at night now Charlotte is 13 months. He says we don't need it and it gets on his nerves!! I only use it when she goes to bed, then switch it off when we go to bed so it's only on for about 3-4 hours. I never use it when she naps either.

We have a new house and the walls etc are quite thin so whenever she cries in the cot we hear her and she kicks a lot when awake and we can hear that too. I also check on her when she goes to sleep about 2 or 3 times before we go to bed. It's more about reassurance for me really, but oh says now she's not newborn there's no point. Especially as I check on her a lot and we don't have it on during the night - he says what's the difference as we don't have it on then?!

I do admit that the bm has been part of my anxiety problems earlier on before being diagnosed with pnd. Hearing her scream when put to bed, in stereo as we could hear her from downstairs & on the bm made me want to crawl up the walls. No though she settles quite quickly.

Do you still use your bm or are you thinking of not using it soon. Would I be a bad mum for not using it (that's my main fear in case something happened)? :\?

I also don't want to end up like one of my friends who used her bm up until her son was 5!!!

Replies

  • I still use mine and Poppy is 17 months. I don't know why but I just like being able to hear her. I still use it through the night too as we have to sleep with our doors closed (cos of the dog!) and I wouldn't hear her if she was to cough or be sick. I know it's silly but I'm just not ready to turn it off yet so if you don't want to, then don't. You need to be happy with whatever you do.
  • I havnt used mine since Tegan was 9 months old. If she were to cry while im downstairs then i can hear her and i also check in her throughtout the night. But if your not completely happy about not using it then i wouldnt, i mean theres no harm in you still using it especially if it puts your mind at ease xx
  • I havent really thought about how long we'll use ours for, cams 8 months now. we have a sensor mat, we dont use the alarm anymore cos now hes a wriggle bum we kept getting false alarms but we still have it plugged in so we can see his breathing light (i was v. nervous about cot death, not for any reason inparticular just felt very scared about it)
    i imagine il use it until he comes out of his cot and into his big bed. it doesnt bother me at night and oh cant even hear it so il keep it for peice of mind)
    why not try one or 2 nights without it and see how you go on? x
  • Well we go to Center Parcs in May when she will be 16 months. I'm planning on not taking it then as all the rooms on 1 floor so we should hear her. I might try after then to wean myself off it......Knowing me I'll still take it on holiday though!
  • Thing is when she's napping and bm not on I'm not anxious at all. I just get on with whatever I'm doing so maybe not having it on in the evening might be better for me - but it's whats best for her really.
  • i dont think it will make any difference to her hun, but it might enable you to switch off a bit in the evening which is never a bad thing.
    i would give it a little try and see how you feel. xx
  • Neve is 13 months and I still use mine - I have the sensitivity turned down so it only cuts in if she cries or was to be sick or something but it makes me feel better to have it on. Now that there is another baby on the way I will have to stop using it soonish but for now I like it. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer to this - whatever makes us mummy's feel better is fine by me!
  • i still used mine with my older two intill they were over two and will do the same with charlie x
  • dont feel bad if you ditch it hun, ive never really used one with evie at all. We did buy one, but i found i could hear evie without it switched on so only used it when she first went into her own room for a month or so but to be honest it did my head in and i never got any sleep because i could hear every little wimper and im a light sleeper

    Then again ive never really been paranoid about anything happening at sleep times, so didnt need it for any sort of reassurance.

    Im sure you'll get on fine without one X
  • We dont use ours anymore for nap times or when he's first put in bed. I use it overnight as we have our doors shut then because of the cats - but I hate mine, its analogue and has constant interference. I dont think we'll use it much longer at night as he sleeps well and is only 2 doors along from us (he's 9 months).

    I never had one at all with dd as we were in a small flat and it never seemed necessary. I'm not too worried, actually cant wait to stop using it, lol!

    It definitely doesnt make you a bad mum for turning it off.

    xxxx
  • Kara is 17 months and we still use ours. We would hear her from our room if she makes a sound but I prefer to have the monitor on. It doesn't bother me being on so I don't see the point in turning it off. Kara is in her own bed as well so I prefer being able to hear her straight away through the monitor if she makes any sound at all.

    Everyone is different and you should do what you feel comfortable with.
  • I never had one to start with. We lived in a small house and the walls were so thin I could here next door telly. We have moved now and its a old style stone cottage, so built proprerly, but I still won't bother with a baby monitor for this baby. I have baby sat for people with baby monitors and they really get on my nerves. I jump at every sound thinking they are awake, hungery etc etc.

    I would consider one if I lived in a town house and baby was more then one floor above or below me or we slept on different floors. I hate having doors closed so I never had that problem.

    Kerry, Freya and Pink Bump
    X X X
  • We don't always use ours, i use it if we are away, we often stay with my sister, but i have to admit it gets on my nerves how it amplifies her screams its s loud louder than her being in the room!!

    I could turn it down i suppose :roll:

    My oh has never wanted to use a baby monitor he thinks it discourages people from actually checking in on the baby, if that makes sense xx
  • My lo is 13 months and I still use ours, we live on one level so I can hear him when he cries properly but maybe not if he was being sick or choking. I use it at night too even though uor room is right next to his, it is just extra peace of mind really. Do what feels right for you xx
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