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Anyone else who can't stop crying?

Having sat up and held baby nearlyl all night-I was just too tired to keep attempting to put him in his crib with the inevitable screaming I have spent nearly all morning sobbing. My OH went back to work today-baby is 19 days old but my mum has come round as I was feeling a bit shaky about the whole thing. She keeps saying I am doing all the right things but can't stop crying. Just feel I am doing everything wrong. I keep telling myself this is normal but just needed to see if anyone else feeling/felt the same?

Replies

  • I felt exactly the same as you when Neve was around the same age. I used to sit on my oh's lap when he got home from work and sob. It DOES get better! took me a few weeks to get over that feeling and it wasn't until Neve was about three months old that I finally felt confident in my abilities as a mother.

    This is an enormous change for you and what you are feeling is completely normal but if it doesn't pass and you are still feeling ropey a little way down the line have a chat with your HV - she will have heard/seen it all before and will be ableto help you.
    xxx
  • hey,

    sleep deprivation and hormones does that to us unfortunately,

    once you start getting more sleep you'll feel better and also once all the hormones settle down.

    my mum came round on the first day that i was on my own and brought my grandparents and a close friend of hers too. I was quite glad once they'd gone and I could chill out on my own with my lo to be honest! My tears used to come early hours of the morning when I was just sooo tired but louise wouldn't settle in her moses basket/cot.

    try to be reasurred by your mum telling you your doing all the right things. It does get easier honestly.

    I agree with ILovemyGeek - perhaps your mum could take your lo out for a walk so you can catch up on some sleep.

    lisa
  • I felt like this aswell more with my first than my second. She wouldn't settle at all and all i wanted to do was sleep, the crying and everything that goes with it is called the baby blues these last a few weeks and should start to fde once you start getting some sleep and baby getting into a routine. Take it as easy as possible and if the lo sleeps during the day then u shoud too. Dont worry about washing a housework it will all still be there when you start to feel better.

    hope evrything gets better soon

    xx

    Danielle

    32+5
  • Oh it's awful hon I completely know where your coming from!
    My LO was born in quite a traumatic labour and I was in shock for a good while after it. She was a nightmare and although I loved going out and showing her off and totally adored her I relished it when she was quiet.
    I cried from day 3 until she was about 3 months old, every day usually more than once. Everyone thought I had PND but I didn't and one day the feeling just lifted and I looked at Ellie and she smiled and it was so lovely!
    Things do get better and the one thing I learnt was to take any help being offered and get as much sleep as you can. Don't worry if there are dishes sitting or clothes to be washed, it can all be done later!
    Hope your feeling better soon xxxx
  • Hey hun i was exactly the same for a good few weeks, some days would be better than others and the slightest thing that went well felt like a huge achievement. To be honest it's only now that im starting to feel much more confident as a mummy and enjoying it (Charlie is 15weeks), I think for me it was lack of confidence and lack of sleep - that definately makes everything seems 10 times harder. Try and get sleep when you can (easier said than done i know) but maybe if your mum is there go and have a sleep for an hour - you'll feel so much better for it and just keep talking to people about how you feel, even if its us on here - i'd be lost without the BE girls!!xx
  • I remember feeling like this too - you are most definately not alone! For the first few weeks of lo's life, I felt totally out of my depth and spent endless amounts of time in tears. But it does get easier. I think the others are right - the combination of hormones and no sleep really does take it's toll!! Not to mention the amount of pressure we put on ourselves to be the perfect Mummy.

    It does get better. I remember one day when lo was about 10 weeks old being out and about with lo in pram and suddenly thinking 'wow, I can really do this!' I think it was the first time I really believed in my abilities as a mummy. I had to phone oh and tell him how good I felt!!

    Lo is now 14 months old and there are still odd days when I wonder if I'm doing things right, and days when I could just sit down and cry - but I think this is normal for first time mum, all part of the learning curve that comes with your first baby.

    Please don't think you are doing anything wrong or that you are unusual in any way. Let the tears flow, then take a deep breath and carry on with whatever baby wants next.

    Good luck and enjoy your beautiful baby. xx
  • Thanks so much everyone for your replies. i am so glad it is not just me. I think I have been getting myself in a tizz because I have been reading all these books which say what LO should suppossedly be doing. i think i will just ignore them for now and go with what he wants to do. My mum was really great, just let me rest and took the baby for a while and cleaned the bathroom. When my OH came in we managed to get LO to sleep (first time he has napped in the avo-prob will sleep even less tonight now!!) for an hour and we actually had a conversation about something that wasn't to do with what should the baby be doing or why is he crying. It was extremely therapeutic-we were both surprised that we had stopped talking about anything else!! Thanks again X
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