Feeds at 8 months (and dropping them!)
Hello. Riley is 8 months now, and i'm not sure when they're supposed to drop feeds? He's breastfed and still tries to feed 3 to 4 hourly during the day. At night he'll go to bed at 6pm, but wake between 10-11pm (latest has been 12) for another feed. Then he'll usually want a feed at 1.30am and 4.30am! I know he can go 6 hours, but if he isnt fed he screams the place down and won't go back to sleep. I really don't know what to do with his feeding, as if he drops feeds i'd rather they were at night! Am worried he may drop daytime feeds and continue at night to make up for it. He has 3 solid meals a day with water to drink at each, plus fruit for pudding or yoghurts after lunch and tea. So I know he's getting enough!
Nap wise he has two naps during the day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Usually a longer one of 1 and a half to 2 hours, then an hour or so for the other. We do the same routine every morning and evening so he knows what to expect. He won't tolerate being kept up later, 6.30pm is the most he will go. He gets up between 6am (mostly!) and 7am unless he is teething in which case he tries getting us up at 5am and can take ages to resettle.
So in short i'm not really sure what to do at all! Haven't had more than 3 hours sleep at a time since he was born and dreaming of the day when he is 15 and I have to drag him out of bed! Lol. I also would like to stop bfing at a year, and am worried if he doesnt drop any feeds he may want to feed 3 hourly forever! It's more the night time feeds which are troubling me at the moment, I wouldn't mind feeding him frequently in the day if he was sleeping and not feeding at night.
Thank you for reading, look forward to any advice anyone can offer, hope all mums and babies are well. xxx
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Nap wise he has two naps during the day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Usually a longer one of 1 and a half to 2 hours, then an hour or so for the other. We do the same routine every morning and evening so he knows what to expect. He won't tolerate being kept up later, 6.30pm is the most he will go. He gets up between 6am (mostly!) and 7am unless he is teething in which case he tries getting us up at 5am and can take ages to resettle.
So in short i'm not really sure what to do at all! Haven't had more than 3 hours sleep at a time since he was born and dreaming of the day when he is 15 and I have to drag him out of bed! Lol. I also would like to stop bfing at a year, and am worried if he doesnt drop any feeds he may want to feed 3 hourly forever! It's more the night time feeds which are troubling me at the moment, I wouldn't mind feeding him frequently in the day if he was sleeping and not feeding at night.
Thank you for reading, look forward to any advice anyone can offer, hope all mums and babies are well. xxx
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Replies
The way we got Louise to drop her nights feeds was for my dh to go to her not me when she woke at night. She learnt to be settled by him instead and quickly stopped waking most nights. Now she goes from 8pmish till 5/6am.
When you feed at night is it a big feed or more of a comfort feed?
Louise has 4 or 5 breastfeeds during the day now at 8 months.
I think you may have to be really tough and refuse to feed him - you could do controlled crying, pick up put down etc.Start with getting him to drop 1 feed and see how it goes. It sounds like he prob does not need these feeds but thet are more out of habit.
Does he settle himself to sleep at night? As maybe he feels he needs milk to settle him back to sleep but if he could settle himself he would?
I asked today about Louise biting me and the person at the clinic (dont think was a hv) was useless too!
He does settle himself to sleep at all his naps and for night time sleep, so that's what confuses me really. Some nights are better than others with the feeding, and once he went 6pm till midnight, then midnight till 4am, then till 7am which was much better so I know he can do it. I just haven't got the heart to be tough with him as hearing him cry upsets me and feel so guilty. xxx
We moved Louise into her own room at the same time as my dh going in to her. I think being in her own room really helped too, she couldn't smell me and we couldn't accidentally disturb her.
I know what you mean about leaving them cry, I hate it, to begin with when my dh went into her it took a while for him to settle her, I had to sit far away with the monitor on mute as otherwise it was distressing for me. I think though that that was also part of the problem, I used to feed her at night because it was the quickest and easiest way to settle her at night when she was in our room.
I didn't feel as bad hearing her cry with my dh in with her than leaving her own her own.
the other thing is to make sure you give him filling foods that digest slowly for his dinner!
Our nights can still be unpredictable but sooooo much better. I am luclky to hve a husband who will get up at night but he doesn't mind as it means she wakes less.
She'll then feed at 11ish, 3ish and 8ish.
Sometimes she'll want a feed earlier than 11 so then they all move down and an extra gets slotted in!
How do you settle Riley during the day? If he normally goes down straight after a feed it might be worth trying to change his feed times so that he is not associating milk with falling asleep, that might help him settle himself at night as well.
xx
I'm not saying this is a good idea but it worked for me. As Loopy Loo said though, I think if you can get him settled without needing feeding, however you do it, you should find that after a few days he sleeps a lot longer.
Hope it gets better and you get more sleep, xx
Bedhead- I usually give it at least 20 mins after feeding him to take him upstairs to his cot, and sometimes he won't take a feed at all if he's tired. Will try maybe a bit longer after feeding him and see if it helps, thank you.
Angela+James- Thank you. Have tried cuddling him but he gets really aggressive and arches back in temper to get milk, but maybe if I try what Loopy Loo says hubby may be able to cuddle him till sleepy as you suggest.
xxx