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Am I doing something wrong...................

Hello

This is probably quite trivial compared to some issues but I am feeling really low at the moment and just wanted to vent some of my frustrations.

My baby is 5 months old, and I am starting to get a little bit annoyed with everyone asking if she is sleeping through yet, and as she isnt, they insist on making comments about it! I just spoke to the SIL and she said 'oh she must be a hungry thing if she is not sleeping through by now'. It has just made me feel like I am doing something wrong. I had always assumed that expecting her to sleep through at 5 months is a bit much, however, people I speak to are making me feel like she should be by now. She is only waking once and sleeps from 8pm until 4am, has a feed and then sleeps until 8am again which I always thought had been quite good. What really annoys me is that SIL is pregnant and I think lives in fantasy world of how babies will be and what they will be doing at certain ages. Grrrr.

It's not even like the waking at 4am is bothering me particuarly. Its other people. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

xx

Replies

  • That sounds perfectly normal to me sugar, my sister has a 5 month old and he sleeps for roughly the same amount of time between his final feed and first one the next day (think his last bottle is a bit later and so his next one in the morning is a bit later)
    If it was bothering YOU to get up at that time then Id of said try getting that last feed a little bit later in the evening by 10 mins each day then eventually the timings would shift around a bit but there is no need to do if you are happy and as QB says just try to ignore them, trust yourself, you know what is best for you and your baby and NO ONE else xx
  • you poor thing i know how you feel .people always say the wrong thing when youve kids.i still get b*****img advice and my eldest is 16.my son never slept at night and ate like a pig.some children just dont ,its like wetting the bed.only thing is dont get too stressed.i did everything to get him to sleep ,he wasnt a crier just was always babbling away or playing but i just made sure he knew that bedtime was bedtime and he wasnt allowed to come out except to go to toilet.but a five month old is still very young.dont pressurise yourself to fall into so called perfect routines ..not possible.enjoy your baby and take comments with a pinch o salt. lots of pma your wayxxx
  • Thanks ladies. Thats really supportive and I needed just a few kind words to get me back on track!! AS luck would have it she slept through til quite late last night...........she tends to have the ood night when she does. Thanks again xx
  • Hi,

    My LO is 5 months next week. She also goes to bed at 8pm, will wake between 3-4am for a feed and then goes back to sleep until 7-8am.
    I also have the odd person say "oh my LO slept through the night without a feed at that age!"
    I just tend to ignore it. All babies are different. My LO is perfectly happy and doing a quick 10 min feed at about 4am doesnt really bother me. Im sure they will go through the whole night at some point.xxx
  • If you are coping with feeding ur lo during the night then it is fine! My lo sometimes still wakes at 4 for a feed but he is sleeping from 7.30 so I don't mind in the slightest.

    It's other people that seem to have a problem with it. Why does other people think that it is some kind of competition - 'Look at how 'good' my baby is, he/she sleeps ALL night'. They act like they have the next child prodigy on their handsimage

    PS Don't listen to your SIL, my sister is the same and annoys me furiously!! Every baby is different xx
  • To be honest I find 5 months to be far too young to sleep through the night. My daughter was an exceptionally good baby and she wasn't sleeping through the night until 14 months. Some babies do naturally sleep through the night but there are some people where I wonder what they do to their babies to make them sleep through. Some people stuff their babies full before bed to MAKE then go through the night and stupid stuff like that and its not right. Unless a baby naturally starts sleeping through the night its not good to make them. I do know people where they just had good babies and they did sleep through from an early age so I am not saying all mums do that but I am saying sleeping through naturally is rarer than you think. I don't really find them waking once in the night tough to deal with so it doesn't worry me some people are so obsessed with babies sleeping through its rediculous. If people get rude or make you feel bad just get rude back and say "no I don't starve my baby" throw it back in their face if they are going to down you and your baby. Its not true that they starve their babies but they deserve it for trying to make you feel bad.
  • I know plenty of toddlers that still arnt sleeping through so really as the others said dont worry and tell them to sod off lol

    Also ppl have different ideas of sleeping through, if baby just wakes for quick feed and goes back down again id call that nearly sleeping thru anyway

    xxDBxx
  • waking up once sounds like a miracle to me honey!

    i have 3 kids..
    2 aged 11 months
    and 1 aged 3 years....

    none of them sleep ALL night!

    my bedroom is like paddington station - one out another in!
    i think your baby is VERY normal!
  • nothings wrong on average your baby is sleeping thro the night my girl goes 2 bed 9.30-1030 till 6-7am so i think same amount of hours so just say your baby is sleeping well
  • Hun my lo didnt sleep til she was 9 months and even then it was only because i went back to night duty full time and my hubby ignored her pleas [she was 23lbs and didnt need the feed!] and she slept through within a week! still, if id been at home i would still be up feeding her and she is 20 months, ignore these people who give all this advice, sometimes i wish people would keep it to themselves, i still get it about my lo not walking till 16 months [perfectly normal!!!] and how slow she was!!!!! *******!!!!!! LOL xxxxx
  • hi, my daughter is 19 months next week and doesnt sleep thru yet. She wakes one or 2 times a night. Every child is different u just concentrate on u and ur baby and ur doing fine. xx
  • Hi there

    My daughter is just over 2 and very rarley will she sleep all night (and its not because shes hungry)

    My sil was saying exactly the same thing to me when holly was 5 months, she then went on to tell me everything i was doing wrong and that i was to let holy cry all night and not give her a feed. I left her house that night and burst into tears as i thought i was the worst mum ever with the worst baby ever, (funny how holly doesnt really like going to visit her now)

    Anyway, there is nothing wrong with your lo and if only waking once a night, well, i think thats amamzing for 5 months. As i said holly doesnt sleep through all the time, but its only once she gets up and i do the ultimate no-no apparantly, i go into her room to settle her back to sleep.

    I would try not to worry to much about other people ( easier said than done) but dont let it get you down. I let it get to me and ended up on meds for depression.

    Sorry i went on a bit but it annoys me when others think they have the perfect baby and that us mums who dont have a child that sleeps all night are doing something wrong.

    Take Care

    Lynda
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