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delayed..well, everything!!!

Hi,

I haven't been on here since i was expecting my little Emily & now she is 10 months old. Please forgive me if you think i am jumping to conclusions posting in this forum but i am really worried!
Ok, i know us mums find it very hard not to compare our lo's to others buuuut, my little Emily is so behind.
My HV has now refferred us to physio as Emily shows no/zilch signs of crawling or bearing any weight on her legs (i mean no weight, even in her walker she pulls her legs up) when i pick her up her little bones 'pop' & she seems more bothered to either stretch as far as possible or cry to get a toy!
Just was wondering if i should be concerned or not. It's a really strange thing but i always knew there was something different about her feet even from 4 weeks old! She can roll from front to back but as she hates being on her front....she's not likely to do it the other way!!!

Help really really appreciated
x x

Replies

  • Hi lucy, Isaac is 2 1/2 now and he showed no signs of crawling at your los age either, he hated being on his front and he would also just cry or stretch to get his toys, you say about her bones popping, Isaac has hypermobile joints and his bones pop, delayed motor skills are really common in children with hypermobile joints as the joints do not support the child very well, Isaac didnt walk until he was 20 months old and has seen a physio and a paediatrician, we still dont really know what is the matter with him as numerous things have now been suggested as well as the hypermobility, its good that your hv is on the ball though and a physio will give you some excercises and stretches that will help keep the muscles strong as low muscle tone is also really common in children with hypermobility.

    Hope that helps xx
  • Thanks Hayley. Your situation sounds very very similar to mine. It's really gtting me down..all the questions like why her & what can be done etc, i'm so stressed about it all!
    Trouble is i hang around with about 8 other ladies who have babies the same age as my little one, but i am finding all the groups have started to turn into a competition of my baby can do this!!! So, i'm finiding it harder to turn up to these groups...just don't want the ahhhhs & pity anymore. I just wish there were groups for parents with babies with slower developing motor skills!
  • I know exactly where you are coming from Lucy, I take Isaac to a soft play place normally on a Wednesday, he is not very confident and still crawls up stairs and cant get down them on his own so as a consequence I have to help him with all the equipment and get on with him, he loves it but I have had comments from other mums about how is supposed to learn to do it for himself if I just do it for him and I do feel really stressed that they can all sit down and have a chat and coffee whilst their children are playing but I have to stay with Isaac. The turning point for me was at his last physio session when I did ask if there was a group session for children like Isaac, she said there wasnt in our area but told me how much good it was doing him having me help him, she is right as I have been going for several weeks now and although progress is slow, he is definitely getting more confident and doing more on his own, he still needs me to help him but I feel happier knowing that what I am doing is helping him, the other mums dont understand and say I should leave him to figure it out, but I know my son better than them, I know what he is and isnt capable of so I do just shrug off the comments now, also it helps that he is my 4th so I have got past the part of caring about how much more advanced their children are than mine (wasnt so easy with my first).

    Try not to get yourself stressed about it, easier said than done I know but if it is hypermobile joints then strengthening excersices given by the physio will help and she will learn to do things just at a slightly slower pace than others. My older 2 have hypermobility and they are 13 and 10 now and have virtually no problems at all now. Isaac on the other hand does have problems although he has other issues apart from the hypermobility but even that said the way to look at it is, that there are worse things it could be and at the end of the day your child is still your child and I know that despite Isaacs problems there is not a thing I would change about him becuase if I did he wouldnt be Isaac. Hope that makes sense, I am a bit rubbish about getting out what I mean to say, hope you get your appointment soon. xxx
  • Lucyloo I know exactly how you feel, my little boy has a muscle condition, not diagnosed yet however luckily it was spotted at birth due to it's severity. although I have sisters and friends with children all encouraging me to go to groups I couldn't face it for months and months, the only sessions I went to were special needs groups and physio sessions, we are lucky here that we have good resources for children with additional needs.

    I have had 2 years to get used to eveything now with lots of support from the group I go to as all the other mums are in similar position, so I am so much more confident at dealing with silly comments and or the pity/poor you comments too, believe me it will get easier for you it just takes time to come to terms with everything.

    the difficult thing about dealing with you other mum friends is that you are dealing with something really big, the health and wellbeing of your precious baby, and you sound like you're at the very beginning of the whol;e situation which is the hardest part, it will get easier as you'll realise with the help of the physio that you are doing the very best for your baby.

    I've even had comments from my sisters, we are very close and they are very supportive, but in the end they don't really know what it's like as non of their children have additional needs. I've had all the 'let him do it, he will learn, he's not a baby anymore ... and all that, I'm having some councelling at the moment too (service provided for carers) and it's helping me deal with things in a way that saves my sanity.

    I hope everything goes ok with the physio, they are very good, make sure you ask loads of questions, don't be afraid to tell them what you think either, your input really really counts.

    I've always found this forum great for support so don't be afraid to come back on this one if you need to chat or even just have a rant

    x x x

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