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Fed up of Limbo :-(

Hope10Hope10
in Trying to conceive
Not sure why I'm posting as the story is still the same. I came off the pill in Feb and other than AF when I stopped I've only had the one in June. I am so fed-up!

I'm going for a referral to the hospital this week since my blood tests have indicated PCOS. I'm not sure what's meant to be happening at the hospital and whether it's just tests or whether I'll be able to speak to anyone. My GP said they might give me clomid etc to bring on my AF or BFP but I really don't want to get my hopes up. I don't know whether to just lay my cards on the table as this is totally becoming all I think about.

I'm feeling really emotional today. I have been constantly getting AF symptoms and BFP symptoms since June and then nothing! I had strange pains the other day whilst xmas shopping and ran to a changing room thinking it was AF but found absolutely nothing. What's making me feel even worse is the fact that 2 people in my family have got their BFPs relatively quickly and are now due within a month of each other and whilst I'm thrilled for them I'm not looking forward to spending christmas hearing every detail and being asked by everyone when I'll be joining them. I feel like screaming every gory detail to vent my frustration.

I'm testing on an almost weekly basis as I haven't got a clue when or if I'm ovulating and when my AF should be due etc.

I think my DH is fed-up of my mood swings etc so much so that he suggested we should maybe stop trying for a while but then I know that I won't be able to get my fertility sorted. I've confided in a couple of friends but I feel like with all the will in the world from my DH and friends that I'm on my own in this one.

Sorry for the waffle but just needed to get all that off my chest. I am about to watch Miracle on 34th street now and know I'll torture myself at the end where the woman gets pregnant haha. Why do I do this to myself? Oh well...

Thanks for reading x

Replies

  • kittenmittenskittenmittens
    I know exactly what you're going through... currently on day 120 of my cycle, nearly 4 months without AF. I had a blood test which shoe dhigh testosterone and then a scan a few days ago, was v lucky to get a cancellation and have one quickly. The scan showed I ov-ed 1-2 weeks ago by the endometrial layer and appearnce of the ovaries which I'm sooo happy about, but also showed I have polycystic and enlarged ovaries so I do have pcos. Hoping for a bfp in the next week or so, but even getting AF will be ok after all this waiting around!

    Push for the scan hun, it's good that you've had blood tests and docs are taking you seriously. You can also ask to be referred to a gynae who'll know more about pcos treatment. Keep bd-ing especially if you see ewcm as you could ov any time. Oh and my SIL is planning to ttc from this month and helpfully said last time I saw her, 'the race is on!' Great. :x

    Watching Miracle on 34th atm, thanks for the heads up as I've never seen it! xx
  • Hope10Hope10
    Thanks kittenmittens. I think my blood test showed high LH but not sure. I go to the hospital on Tuesday but I'm not certain whether it's a scan or to see the gynaecologist as it says fertility/infertility/gynaecology. That's good that the scan has given you the reassurance you need you mus be so excited to know something is happening whether it's AF or BFP- fingers crossed but either way I suppose it means you can get going.

    It's a lovely film but it always makes my cry. Maybe we just need to go round looking for old men with white beards to try and send us our BFP haha.

    Thanks for the advice.
  • kittenmittenskittenmittens
    Good luck for the hospital appt, I'd be really interested to know what happens! x
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