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Due in March 2018 - Part 2

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  • Yes thinking of it That was it must be guilt! We tried to explain it’s not how much she spends on things that matters it’s just being there for us that we need! But she didn’t even message me about our scan last week or anything so I just presumed she didn’t care. i have spoken to my mum and she seems to think the same as me, that it’s disgusting that she’s trying to make it all about her. It’s just funny actually becahee my Mum is getting freebies so really her point is invalid. My partner said he spoke to her from work today and told her to stop being so immature about it And apparently her response was ‘well you two are immature involving some more than others‘ to which he simply put the phone down  I have in no way selectively involved people, they have involved themselves and we’re just resiprocating it. We invited her to the scan and she didn’t come yet we’re selective  

    eeeeeek the weeks are flying by for us, I’m 21 weeks tomorrow and definitley feeling little man rumbling around in there! Xx 

  • Oh gosh Roo... maybe in time it'll sort itself out, but being nasty to your mum and name calling just is not on! 

    Yes im loving the kicks and bumping around now.. I can feel her moving well above my belly button everyday and a pattern is forming! 😍🤗 

    How long until your scan now mrsp? 

  • Desperately needing advice!

    As well as having a baby on the way, me and my partner are currently trying to apply for a mortgage. I've been doing supply work as they said it was ok for the application, then got told two days ago they need 3 years of payslips and I'd been told wrong. So now I'm desperately trying to find a part time job so we're able to apply for this mortgage before baby arrives. I have an interview for a Wether spoons on Monday. I'm just worried about being pregnant and them not giving me the job due to it.

     Im getting myself into such a state, supply has been absolutely dead recently so we need the income. I'm just panicking nobody will give me a part time job :(. People have said to not mention it at interview, wait until I have a contract then tell them. I know I have until the 25th week to inform employers. Im worried they'll dismiss me after the probation period though when they know I'm pregnant. 

    Anyone been in a similar situation and can offer advice? 

  • Hi Samantha, I was in exactly the same position as you a few weeks back, 6 weeks ago in fact. I can’t advise you on the mortgage situation as I don’t know anything about that, but at 14 weeks pregnant I lost my Full time job. I’d been there 6 weeks and told them about 4 weeks in i was pregnant when I had my 12 week scan  2 weeks later they laid me off with the excuse that they don’t think I have progressed enough etc even though before they knew I was pregnant I had nothing but good feedback so I knew deep down it was because they didn’t want a pregnant member of staff. we then went to Spain for a week and when I got home I found a part time job Which I’m doing now and they’ve been nothing but wonderful. I told them at the end of my interview I’m pregnant. I made sure they got to see me for me first and then at the end I said I want to be honest so we’re all on the same page etc and told them how far I am. I got the job regardless. So there is hope. It’s a judgement call throughout the interview if you think it’s going really well and think they really like you id tell them, but not telling them and being quite far along may cause issues once you do tell them and they can still lay you off like they did to me. It wasn’t wetherspoons I got a job with but I’d think they would rather you be honest for health and safety reasons. But like I said go in be completely extra and make them see you for you and then just tell them you’re pregnant and not only need to work but you want to work! That’s what I said and I got a job xx 

  • Also look up their policies and see if anyone has ever posted about the company and pregnancy that will give you a good scope of what to do. Just search forums like this for threads about it maybe. I asked one of my friends who used to work where I work and she said they were fab with her maternity leave so don’t see why they would particularly mind and they didn’t. So finding out from people who work/worked there would be beneficial directly to you so you’ll know steps to take x 

  • Good luck MrsP, fingers crossed everything goes well 🤞🏻☺️ Xx

  • Aww Roo what a time your having! Seems to be one thing after another for you and your partner. Hopefully MIL will see sense soon but by the sounds of it, maybe not! 

    Samantha sorry I can't help but good luck with the interview. Hopefully if your honest and give a good interview they will take into account the bigger picture but I understand why you would be concerned. Mortgages can be such a pain in the butt at times! 

    Appointment was ok today. They didn't even weigh me again but said due to how much I dropped at the start they would like 3 weekly growth scans. They pretty much said it was a tick box exercise though and they have no concerns for baby luckily.

  • Samantha I’m sorry to hear of your predicament. They can’t not employ you because of your pregnancy but we all know it happens. I agree with Roo it’s probab best to be honest and just see what happens. If not do you have to get a permanent job now? Could a mortgage wait until after baby arrives and you go back to work? I remember when I got our mortgage it was very stressful with showing payslips, proof of savings etc so I can’t imagine the stress your feeling with being pregnant too. 

    Glad your apt went well dinky. You can never have too many scans in my opinion 😊

  • Sorry I’ve been mia ladies. was at my course and have had a few stressful days prepping for my driving test. 

    I had my test this morning and passed 😁😁😁😁🚗 such a weight lifted knowing that me and baby wont be stuck in doors lol.

    my scan is next Thursday the 9th of November I’m really looking forward to it 😁

    sorry to hear about your situation sam that’s not great at all. I can’t give you any advice on the situation sorry I’ve never been there myself. Sorryhowever I do hope it heats better and that you can find something to help out. Xxx

    hope you’re all doing well ladies 😁

  • Hello Ladies...

    Sorry Samantha I've not been in either situation so unable to advise. I hope it sorts itself out for you. Good luck with the interview 😊

    Brill MrsP congrats on passing your driving test! Less than a week count down now 🎉 The final week before scans seem to whiz by for me! 

    im feeling very head heavy at the moment and lethargic! I had a 3 hour nap yesterday! Hope this doesn't last long as it's my dads 60th birthday this month and my graduation so two pretty big events haha!  

    On the brighter side, my friend came round with all her daughters newborn clothes and a pretty much brand new Moses basket and OH and I just melted 😩😍💗🤗 anyone else just dying to meet their little human? 

  • Evening ladies!

    Kara - that sounds really rubbish of the midwife! I'd be inclined to chase further - maybe they've got you mixed up with someone else. Glad he's healthy though. I'm very surprised your consultant appointment is so late. Mine was booked for about 23 weeks. The fact you've had an app through for the anaesthetist would suggest to me something has slipped through the net. I'd get on to your GP/midwife and tell them what's happened. Good luck x 

    Roo - sorry to hear about your MIL - she sounds like a nasty piece of work! Try not to let her get to you - I know that's easier said than done.

    Elexox - lovely to see you; sorry to hear about sciatica and pelvic pain. I had SPD/PGP last time and only got told afterwards that osteopaths can be very good to help - might be worth asking if your GP does referrals? Or find someone private? That's good that the swimming helps. 

    Crap - didn't realise the time. Need to log off and go pick up my baby! Will finish at home this evening :-)

  • I feel really lethargic Too!!! I literally feel like I have been on a rollercoaster or something, and the naps are becoming a daily need 😂 

    one of my friends bought a bundle of clothes round too! cant wait to meet my little man, the second half of this pregnancy are definitely going to drag x 

  • Oh my god !! There is so much going on!! I read you all but can’t answer all the time as I work a lot, I work 55 hours a week and if I had a nap a day it would be the next day by time I wake up haha my maternity pay is calculated over the hours I do for the previous 6 months ... so I should get a nice pay for the first 2 months after that I get only gov pay which is crap! 

    Anyway funny enough one of my staff gave me a Moses basket and some clothes for my little boy I was so happy and a guest bought me a towel that says peanut as that it what we call him atm lol 

    hope you are all well xx 

  • Congratulations MrsP driving will open up the world for you and baby. I couldn’t be without my car 🚗 

    Thanks tayto I definitely was missed in regards to getting a consultant appointment. At least I’ve got one now, I’ll be 24 weeks then so that’s about right I guess. Just worried that if it was someone else they may not have thought to question it. Really not impressed so far and it might sound silly but it’s making me really consider if I would have anymore children if I’ve lost confidence in the staff.

    Mel2 do u actually work a 55hr week!! That’s mental! i Miss my naps with this pregnancy. Don’t have that joy when u have a child already! 

  • yep I work 55 hrs a week I love my job but it is tiring ... and I still have to run a house and cook and do all the washing have no help from no one as my husband works 7 days a week and my mum has her job too but i manage well and I still consider myself a good house wife 😉 I’m looking forward to having Baby here so I can have a rest from work and enjoy a bit more time at home haha 

    i can’t fault my midwife she is brilliant she even gave me her number if I ever had any doubts about anything!! My next appointment is when I’m 24 weeks too which is in 2 weeks 😊 x 

  • Wow fair play to you Mel2 i couldn’t do that. I work 30 hours over 4 days and that’s plenty!! 

    My midwive is nice enough and I have their numbers if I need to call but I just feel like another number to them. I was expecting to be monitored more due to my birth experience last time but honestly they don’t seem to give a sh*t! If it wasn’t for me mentioning it and nagging at them things wouldn’t be happening and that’s not right. I nearly lost my daughter because of an incompetent midwife last time and I’m not going to be fobbed off this time. Sorry for the rant I’ve had an emotional day 

  • Kara by the sound of things you’ve every right to expect increased monitoring and attention this time. If i was you, i’d be exactly the same. I wouldn’t worry about nagging them, end of the day your baby is your priority. 

    We had another routine check up scan last night and everything was great. Baba even had the hiccups during it, the little jumps were so cute. 

    I hope everyone is having a lovely weekend. Xx 

  • P.s. Congratulations MrsP! No stopping you now! 🚗💨👏🏻🎉

  • I feel the same with my midwife, she was off on holiday on my first appointment then the second time she didn’t even know I have a massive ovarian cyst, I had to tell her the other midwives plans for me to have a c section!!!! Then the hospital is even worse really they just pass you on as one of many, again having to repeat myself to everyone so ensure I get the right care from everyone as I don’t want to slip under the radar by relying on them. I’m so worried that it will happen so if anything I’m overly in professionals faces about my care but st the end of the day it’s not about us is it, it’s our babies xx 

  • Kara and Roo, I’m sorry you are not having a good experience with midwifes it’s a shame and  knowing that there is “history“ or something could go wrong they should be even more attentive with you! I’ve had a couple of problems with NHS before... it’s not fair when all you want is for them to take care of you and your little one! 

    And i would be the same by the way if that was me! keep pushing them!! Not long and babies will be here as long as all ok that is the main thing 💙🍼🎀💖

    have a good day, I have another long day! Xx

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