One day a five year old little girl excitedly approached her mother, and announced that she had learned where babies come from. The mother was amused and said, "Oh really sweetie, why don't you tell me all about it?" The little girl then explained, "Well ... the mommy and daddy take off all of their clothes and the daddy's wiener stands way up high and the mommy kneels on the floor and puts the daddy's wiener in her mouth, and then the daddy's wiener sort of explodes and makes sticky juice into the mommy's mouth, and then the mommy swallows the sticky juice, and that's where babies come from." The mother looked lovingly at her daughter, leaned over to meet her eye to eye and said, "Oh honey, that's sweet, but that's not where babies come from ... that's where jewellery comes from."
A guy comes home from work feeling bad about the day's activities. He lays down on the couch and ponders his actions. Like most of us, his conscience has two voices; that of his good moral side and that of his mischievous side. While staring at the ceiling, a voice in his head says "don't worry about it, a lot of doctors have sex with their patients." The man tosses and turns in reflection of his actions. Again the voice says "don't worry about it, a lot of doctors have sex with their patients." Feeling somewhat relieved, the man begins to relax and feel better about himself at which time another voice in head says, "but you're a veterinarian."
husband says "i fancy kinky sex can i come in your ear" wife says "no i might go deaf" husband says "ive been coming in your mouth for 20 years and your still f**king talking"
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announced that she had learned where babies come from. The mother was amused and
said, "Oh really sweetie, why don't you tell me all about it?"
The little girl then explained, "Well ... the mommy and daddy take off all of
their clothes and the daddy's wiener stands way up high and the mommy kneels on
the floor and puts the daddy's wiener in her mouth, and then the daddy's wiener
sort of explodes and makes sticky juice into the mommy's mouth, and then the
mommy swallows the sticky juice, and that's where babies come from."
The mother looked lovingly at her daughter, leaned over to meet her eye to eye
and said, "Oh honey, that's sweet, but that's not where babies come from ...
that's where jewellery comes from."
activities. He lays down on the couch and ponders his
actions. Like most of us, his conscience has two voices; that of his good
moral side and that of his mischievous side.
While staring at the ceiling, a voice in his head says
"don't worry about it, a lot of doctors have sex with their patients." The man
tosses and turns in reflection of his actions. Again the voice says "don't worry
about it, a lot of doctors have sex with their patients." Feeling somewhat
relieved, the man begins to relax and feel better about himself at which time
another voice in head says, "but you're a veterinarian."
Wife: Sure. You stand by the ironing board and I'll sit on
the couch and drink beer and fart!
stevie wonder answerin the iron
Whats green and points north? A magnatic cucumber
Whats green and square? An orange in disguise.
wife says "no i might go deaf"
husband says "ive been coming in your mouth for 20 years and your still f**king talking"