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Scared of labour. . is anyone else?!

Hi everyone. . . i was just wondering if its just me thats teriffied of giving birth? I have constant nightmares, and feel so anxious. I am scared to death! The thought teriffies me, as much as im looking forward to my baby coming out to meet me. . im just really dreading the labour. I have heard so many horror stories. . Its my first baby, i have 11 weeks to go but i cant stop thinking about it. Does anyone else feel like this?! Everyone i seem to talk to think im over reacting about it. Does anyone have any words of wisdom?!
Its worse that my fiancee wont be here for the birth, he doesnt get back from iraq until june!!! Help. . Sophia x x x


  • dont worry just go with the flow and once you have given birth then you forget about it all anyway x x x
  • Hi faithlouise. . thanx 4 advice. I am just really stressed about it, i can't stop worrying and feel as though i wont be able to push him out!! I know that sounds ridiculous but i cant help it x x
  • try not to worry to much just think of it as a good thing i was really worried with my first as i just did not have a clue but i just got excited when it came to it,but honestly honey you will be fine take care x xx
  • Thank u for reply and advice. . hope everything goes well with your baby. x x x
  • Sophia, the best you can do is research your hospitals policy as much as possible. Make a birth plan, ask for a tour of the labour/maternity ward. Ask lots of questions about their pain releif options and start discussing now with your midwife what YOU want to happen at the birth. IMO the more in control you are the less fear there will be. Obviously if there are any complications then the plan goes out of the window but that can't be helped but if things go as planned then you can have a relaxed birth where you are in control.

    Things you can control for example are who is in the room. (no students for example) what drugs you want & when you want them, how the baby is placed after birth, straight on you or cleaned up first. if they think you have to be cut, you can refuse & whether you will allow them to use a ventouse or forceps.

    I think some apprehension & fear is normal though, I mean this isn't an everyday occurance is it!! image
  • Hi Beebee. . There are students in the room when you give birth? Seriously?! I nearly choked on my tea then!! I clearly have to do more research don't i? I don't know anything about it. . Sophia x
  • To be honest a bus load of strangers could've been in the room when I had dd, as long as they brought nice drugs with them I didn't care!
  • I really do not want students in there!! I dont know what pain relief to have, its about 10 weeks away now so do i have to think about that yet?!
  • Wouldn't panic yet hun, only wrote my ideas down last night and have just 11 days to go! I agree with Bee bee though, have a read up on things and it'll at least let you know your options and give you a greater sense of control over things. Have you had a hospital tour or antenatal/parentcraft classes yet cos things like seeing where you're actually going to give birth can sometimes help? Can reccommend 'The best friends guide to pregnancy' for telling you the things that no-one else will tell you about giving birth, whilst giving you a laugh at the same time!
  • Hi. . no i have not been to any parentcraft classes or had a hospital tour. I have noe been offered any of this yet, dont know if they will. Ill try relax and worry about the birth nearer to the time x x
  • Hi Sophia
    I'm worried too (just going into wk 33) but i keep telling myself it's what i'm designed for and loads have done it b4 and keep doing it so it can't be all that bad (can it?!?! LOL!) Someone said to me that having a student mwife about can be a really good thing as they'll stay with you and have time to sit, chat and help you through it all instead of prof mwives and docs who'll be coming and going. Just thought i'd pass that on - hope it helps. Take care x
  • Thanks Juliette. . i feel silly for panicking but all ive heard is these horror stories of women giving birth!! My mom tells me not to worry so much, as she had 2 herself. Everyone ( i mean everyone )tells me how the pain goes when you first see your baby though x
  • I'm hoping pain goes once baby is with me too. I'm a bit worried in case i don't bond with baby straight away. No idea why, just worried (i do a lot of worrying!) But friends hav said that if they didn't bond right away they did soon after and you just hav to give yourself time. I'm hoping all is normal with labour cos then we can deliver at our local mat unit which is really small and friendly. See if you can get a visit to where you'll deliver - i found it helps to picture it and you can ask loads of qs too x :\)
  • hi if your that scared u could make an appointment with the doctor at the hospital and ask for a planned c section cause of your fears and my hubby says army will make sure ur hubby is back for that if they will not let him back any other way .
  • hi ust read ur pther post good luck hope they let him home
  • If they've not mentioned tour or classes then make sure you ask cos they can be a bit rubbish at telling you - I'm at a different hospital this time cos they closed the last one and when I asked about a tour the midwife said well it's just the same but a bit newer! Needless to say I have been for my tour round so at least I know how to get in the place!
  • I will ask my modwife my nxt appt is wed 28th feb so ill see what she says, i have a list of questions as long as my arm for her. . ! She should tell me these things i the first place and i wouldnt have to ask her so many questions x
  • Hi Lynn. . thanx for reply. I hope they let him home too. Got my fingers crossed x
  • if they dont speak to a doc hubby says there are ways around it he played them all he he they are stubron but all have hearts even if they are not willing to admit it
  • I am really trying to get him home for birth. . i dont know what else i can do apart from wait. . x p.s i didnt know you could have a planned c section x
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