this bloody baby wont sleep!

and im beginning to lose patience with him.

al i get from his dad is well i cant do anything about it i need to sleep too, well SO DO I!!!!!

he has to be pushed to chnge his nappies, feed him and even pick him up and cudle him when he gets home from work. if i leave them together for 2 hours he thinks hes done really well by getting lo to take about 3 oz of milk, when in reality if it had been me he would have expected me to make tea, load the dishwasher and wash up the rest, do the washing, feed the baby, walk the dog........... oh and make mself beautiful and ready for a shag when he gets home. Grrrrrrrrrrrr

Well im fuming. its him that lets the baby stay awake late, him tha just laughs and thinks its funny, unless of course he needs to be up early in the morning. then its my fault lo wont sleep.

when he does do anything with the baby he expects me to tell him what to do and how to do it and it just makes me sooooo mad!

and now, 'Darling' husband is fast asleep in bed where ivce been trying to get the baby to sleep for the last half hour and all he could do was play bloody scrabble on his laptop!
all day today - when he wasnt out for 5 hours playing golf that is - he's been on the sodding laptop, playing scrabble. i ask him to do something with ollie, he merely picks him up puts him on his knee and carries on with scrabble...

i understand he goes to work and earns the money, but i too need a bit of space away from the baby, and im expected to just put up without any space what so ever. this is the horrible bit - i havent had a shower for 3 days because i havent had time with running around after what he wanted me to do and the lo.
Well, I've had enough. I fully intend to leave him to it until at least closing time at the pub tomoz (oh thats another thing he does, asks if he can go for a pint so we agree a time to be home by for tea, then he rings me and asks for another half an hour, then another half an hour and so on - i cant enjoy a good drink more than once a fortnight coz im still bf and hes in the pub 3 times a week spending money we dont bloody have, and he has the cheek to say we havent got any money for this that and the other)
if he ring me i'll just tell him he has to learn and when i get the usual response to that, but you know how to do so just tell me what to do I'll simply say I had to learn just like you do.

It's really wound me up, sorry ladies.
Any ideas on how I can get the brat to sleep? Oh oops, the brat is asleep, i mean the baby.



  • I really feel for you. You really need to sit oh down and have a heart to heart he is being really unfair to you. I would allow the pub one evening a week and I would agree a time- say to him that fairs fair and not to be ringing just get his backside home at the arranged time.

    If he is allowed an hour or so in the pub one evening a week then I think you should have one evening a week away from the gouse. Go to a friends for a cuppa or swiiming or whatever you fancy. Again agree a time and be fair- return as agreed.

    He has no need to be in the pub three nights a week. Explian to him that ur at home all day and it can get lonely. Is there anyone who can babysit for you?? Perhaps once a week or fortnight?? Just so that you can spend a bit of time relaxing as a couple.

    Five hours of golf????? How often does this happen? Then to come home and sit on the computer playing games- he is acting like a teenager. U 2 really need to talk you are going to start to resent him if this continues. Show him once or twice how to bath/change hes not an imbesile and it isn't rocket science.

    Have a good talk with him and get all of the issues out in the open- try not to cry or scream or hes likely to say your just being hormonal and its definately best if you get someone to take baby for you as he will likely interrupt.

    Now for the baby. I can bet there is an atmosphere in your house fit to be cut with a knife!!???? If your wound up and annoyed the baby will sense this and this is probably a big part of the problem. Do you go out much during the day?? If the baby gets some fresh air he will sleep better. Even get hubby to take baby a walk in the evening- surely he wouldn't need instruction on how to do that!!!

    All the best- let me know how you get on
  • Stephe

    This has an uncanny ring to it - watch this space as I'm sure I'll be saying something similar in a few weeks... And chucking the laptop, blackberry and mobile in the bath if he won't leave them alone (I'm always threatening to do this and if I'm close to the edge I might just carry it through).

    Sounds like he does need a good talking to (and if it was me it would end up in screaming contest which doesn't help anyone). Even the calmest person (normally me) gets to a point where they've had enough, sounds like you're there and he's not noticing or helping matters.

    We all know they have to work but if you've not had enough time for a shower in 3 days then something's not right.

    As for getting Ollie to sleep - I'm no expert but why not try having a glass of red wine before your last feed (surely that's not too criminal?)... I'm planning to try this and hoping it works - my best friend is also swearing by infacol and offering to send me bucket loads out to Thailand (but as I'll be in the UK soon enough I've passed on the offer for now!).

  • Don't really know what to suggest to any of this although I think a proper chat is probably in order as he is being OUT OF ORDER as has perviously been stated. I just wanted you to know I have read and recognised and hope things get better soon you really must get this sorted esp if you are serious about trying for no.2 you can't be going through this with 1 let alone when another arrives!!!!

    TALK to him (no shouting or crying allowed though!!!)

    Hope you get it sorted!!!!! XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
  • Men are total turds, when they're not being lovely and sexy. How are you feeling now? Have you talked?
  • hiya, sorry its been so long to get back to you, but we've come to an agreement.

    i walked out on monday, went to the pub and then went to a friends house. It hurt us both but it has helped a lot.
    after this we sat down and talked, and he agreed that there was a lot involved with looking after lo, and that we had to compromise on it.

    so now, he comes hom and gets chnged, then comes down and spends half hour with ol, feeding him to make sure hes had enough for when we eat tea. during tea if lo wants anything he will get up and sort him out. then after that we take it in turns to put him to bed and see to him if he cries....
    he gets tuesdays at pool, and sundays at golf, I get mondays wherever i want - probably just my mates house up the road or the pub with her - and thursdays at darts.
    he knows how to change nappies, and how to bath him and what to do at night if he wont self soothe. he even took him at 3am the other night when he woke up and i was in pain and couldnt settle him. the only thing hes not 100%with still is making up his food, but the more he does it the better he learns, and i just keep a watchful eye on him.
    saturday nights are for us, so we get lo to bed and spend some time together watching a film or something, or even getting a babysitter to go out for a meal.

    so a big improvement on all accounts...

    and think af is on her way... had massive stomach cramps on wed and also today. will keep you updated.

    thanks for all you advice.

    forgot to add ollie slept from 9.30 to 7am the last two night.... image

    [Modified by: Stephe Yeadon on November 03, 2007 01:36 PM]
  • I'm so glad you've sorted things out so well. It all sounds fabulous and I hope it continues well into the future.
    good luck to you and well done Ol for sleeping so well image

  • that sounds much much better -well done you for getting it sorted and I am glad things are a bit more evenly spread now! I might book mark this post to show hubbie for when it is me tearing my hair out in a few months time! :lol:

    Stay well!
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