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Judging

Do you think young mothers are often judged/looked down on?



I have noticed this quite a bit. I was 19 when I had my little girl, I'm 22 now and she has just gone 3. Some people still have the odd snide remark (mainly my neighbour), and I've never really understood it.



Anyone can be a good mother, a bad mother. Age shouldn't be used against someone in my opinion.



What about you guys? Have you ever been victim to others judgements/presumptions? Does it bother you?

Replies

  • hey,

    This prob quite off your mark but im 22 and engaged to a wonderful man(22). im pregnant 34wks and his granny being who she is told me and him when we went to tell her OUR good news she told me to have an abortion, app im too young and because we are not married. she called me many things i will not repeat. she now denies that convo because no one from his family is talking to her. i felt so bad for weeks that she of all people would have said tht to her ONLY grandson(and me). basicly my point is you can be a great mum no matter what your age is as long as you have the support of your family and friends and love for your new bundle of pooping crying joy you will be fine. age is just a number, its what you have to give to the baby that counts.



    flump xx
  • Hey there.

    Yup, I can't remember anyone actually saying rude comments to me, but I notice a lot of people stare at me when I'm out with my DD. It's extremely annoying, as obviously those people don't know the situation, and they don't know that I'm actually an amazing mother and work really hard, even if I am younger than the average age to start having children.



    Just try to ignore it, I say. I'm pretty much used to it now. However I bet it'll crack up a notch once I'm pregnant with baby number two!

    xxx
  • Im only 19 soon to be 20 but look a lot younger! Im not yet pregnant but im a nursery nurse and i do nannying when i look after one little girl who is 3 i always get tutted at and get given dirty look's. Me and my boyfriend have just decided to come off the pill we are not trying but not preventing but i know for a fact im going to get a lot of dirty looks and comments but i know for a fact i will give my child so much love and be the best mum i could possibly be why should it matter what my age is. Yes some girls are way to young i was watching underage and pregnant and some girls on there i just think madness but then my mum had me at 30 plus and she wasnt a brilliant mum tbh! I think people need to stop judging a book by it's cover.
  • hi im now 26 but was 20 when i had my eldest (19 when i was pregnant) i now also have a almost 2 year old and when i am out with her people say i look too young to have kids and then look floored when i tell them i have a 6 year old too but so what! i have learnt not to give a hoot what anyone else thinks. when i take and pick my daughter up from school i am clearly the youngest mum at the gate! (by about 10 years, i live in a small village too so stand out a bit,lol) but i know i can give my daughters exactly the same as the older mums. she is very well loved,clean has plenty of toys and more than that she has my full support and a loving home.

    I obv speak to the other mums and the only thing i have noticed difference in is what we expect from our children. now i wouldnt encourage my children to be young parents but i think its neive to act like it will NEVER happen-they think there is no way their little angels will do that!
  • Hey.. There are always going to be people judging younger mums and so on, but nobody is in a position to judge anybody.. taking my baby sister to the shops turnt a lot of head my way, and i dont think its right to be so critical; what if she was my child, say i'd been a rape victim? i know its a horrible example, but it happens and its the principle. I dont think age effects the abilities of a young mum, ive grown up in care and seen countless babies come off of their mothers aged 15 and so on, but they were on heroin and so on, and you wouldnt want a child in their care.. I think its wrong, but it happens.. but until you know the person personally, i dont think it's their place to say anything (:
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