Children sharing bedrooms. Cross posted with BT
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I've put this in BT too as I know some people only use one board:
This is just a pondering but given the choice and assuming you have a decent sized bedroom, would you let your children share a room (whatever their age and gender) or would put them in their own room. I know of a couple of people whose siblings share a room despite having a separate bedroom to put them in And so I wondered if there was a reason for this eg.bonding, learning to share or just because.
We should be moving soon and want somewhere with a third bedroom so A and N can each have their own space but then I got thinking would it be so bad for them to share (if the room is big enough) and have the spare room as a play room or something else? I imagine it would only work for a couple of years anyway because they are 4 years apart and a brother and sister would need their own space and privacy at some point but while they're young it might be ok. We will probably put them in their own rooms anyway as A is a poor sleeper but again just a pondering.
Replies
Seperate here. J could go in C's room, but H and I have given up our bedroom, so that J can have his own room.
I have a 7.5 yr gap though, so at almost 10 yrs old, C likes having his own space. I wouldn't want to take that away from him, hence losing my bedroom to a 2 yr old.
They play with each other every day, so they do the whole "sharing/bonding" thing then.
The girls share as we have no other choice. They are 17 & 14 and in bunk beds FFS. It really pees me off but we can't do anything else for them as we have no room. L is in the box room and he doesn't even have room for toys. I hate my house.
If it were me I'd put them in their own rooms, single beds, nicely decorated, then they have room to play in each others if they want to r get some time alone if they want to.
My boys shared a room when the younger was 1.5 years through to 3 years old and the elder one was 4.5y to 6y. Then we moved house and decided to give them a room each. They sleep much better in their own rooms and the elder one especially likes having his stuff in his own room. But they did miss each other for a while and they like having a sleepover together now and again! They play together in one of the bedrooms so I wouldn't worry about making one room a 'playroom'.
My two used to have their own rooms to begin with, but then we moved to a 2 bed house with the intention of extending upstairs to 3 bedrooms, but we haven't got round to it yet, so they have shared for the last 3 years (they are now 7 and nearly 5). They have the biggest room and loads of space for all their things, and even though S isn't a grea sleeper, J sleeps through anything, so she doesn't disturb him or vice versa. We are now beginning to look at our options of doing the upstairs extension or moving to a 3 bed new build in the village, but they would be fine sharing for a few more years if it takes us a while to decide what to do!
I just wondered if I was missing a trick. I think it will be better to have their own rooms in our situation although I do think N would love having her in his room but they might play me up as A gets older. No best to keep them separate
That's lucky they don't disturb each other Catarina, A is so loud when she wakes up and it would wake N in the early hours.
My LO never woke his older brother when he was crying in the night. I've heard that's the norm.
It was more in the early mornings, they would both get up early and come and wake me up! In their own rooms, at least if one is tired they sleep in a bit longer.
Mine are together in a big room despite having a third spare room. They are 3 and coming up for 5 and will be going into separate rooms at the end of the year to get their own space and take ownership of their own stuff.
It has been great them sharing, it has worked really well because of their natures and I think also their closeness in age (19 months apart). I hear them whispering to each other at night as they drift off to sleep and they are just great company for each other. They are both excellent sleepers which also obviously helps immensely as on the few occasions one has been up in the night the other has been rarely disturbed. They have been together since my daughter was about 7 months or so and I know that at first they will miss each other when they go into their own rooms.
my sister's two girls share a bedroom despite having a 3 bedroom house, that has recently been extended to a 4 bed in the loft. one in a toddler bed aged4, and the 2 yr old in a cot. their room is nice sized double and the 3rd bedroom is more of a box. I think they originally shared so that the 3rd bedroom could be used for guests to sleep (family live far away so stay over to visit), but since they had the loft conversion they still share. I think it helps that they are close in age and gender and it would be unfiar to decide which child had the smaller room. Or Maybe she is hoping to have another baby in the future and use the smaller 3rd bedroom for any future child.
My friend's two shared until very recently. They are currently 6 and nearly 3. This summer the 6 year old has moved herself into the playroom (although this wasn't straightforward and for a while the youngest one was sleeping in the playroom and then both were in there) while the younger one still has the other bedroom. I think they did the sharing first of all because they live in a town house and it meant that both were on the same floor as their parents so could deal easily with night wakings, etc.
My two share a room but we only have two bedrooms and they're so close in age. Ideally I'd let them have their own space but actually Eleni hates being alone. She only started sleeping through once we moved Jonah in with her so in a way it works for them anyway. Their bedroom is almost twice the size of ours and a lot of people in the same houses divide it into two but we will cross that bridge when we come to it or go up into the loft if we still can't move anywhere bigger.
We have 3 bedrooms and currently mid extension project. They are having a playroom and iv suggested to H that both boys can go in together as its a decent sized room and use Ls room as a study but put the wardrobes in there to. H is really against this as he feels that they will have the playroom and should have their own space to sleep or just to go to their own rooms for done quiet time. If we have another then they will need to share just until we convert the loft which is pencilled in for about 4/5 years time
Pip, our kids' room is the same - big enough to split into two if we needed to, there are 2 windows as well. Our neighbours put up a partition wall for their two kids.
My two were supposed to be sharing a bedroom 5 and nearly 3. They will be when we move. I think it is a great experience plus my two will benefit from the company. My friend's two share and they don't need to. She says it makes bed time easier for her. U can be stood nest to B screaming her head off and if he is asleep she can't disturb him - it was certainly the case last night. Not sure about the other wya round though!
I have a 5yr age gap so it wouldn't work for us. Es bedroom is big enough for both of them and Js bedroom is a tiny box room but E is 9.5yrs and likes her own space and they go to bed and sleep at different times. They will play together in Es bedroom and E has a double and single bed so usually both sleep in there one night over the weekend.
We have discussed swapping the bedrooms when E gets older and doesn't need space to play when J will but I'm not sure. I would love them both to have decent size bedrooms or at least a play room where J could play and even have a sleep over in it when he gets older.
My older boys share (8&5) and they love it most of the time. They have bunkbeds. R (19m) has the box room and as we don't really plan on moving, two of them will always probably share. I had my own room as a teenager but my sister slept in with me nearly every night (in my bed!) as she much preferred to share. I think it can be really good for them.
My two never shared a room b/c they were both terrible sleepers and would wake each other up. I know other people who shared v well. One friend has a 3 bed but has the kids sleep in the box room in bunk beds and uses the bigger bedroom as a play room, which works out really well. when they are older they will get their own rooms