Forum home General Chat General chat

Would you monitor your kids' online activity?

I was reading about fantastic software enabling you to monitor your child's phone or online accounts (FB etc) without them knowing. 

Would you consider this?  I hate the idea but wondered what others thought. Maybe I'm dismissive because I haven't looked at it from all angles.


  • I am very wary about my children using the internet so would monitor it by wtachign what they were doing, software to do it seems a bit underhand.

  • My SD V is 12 next week. We have all of her passwords to email, Facebook, (her mum let her have FB at the age of 8 and we feel we can't really take it away from her now. Although she doesn't really use it) her KIK, and the others they have these days.

    Would I snoop? Only if she suddenly became secretive, anxious about me seeing stuff ect. I have in the past. And would again. My SD knows all this and is perfectly fine with it :-)

  • I wouldn't use software, but I do keep tabs on what C is upto.

    I have his passwords for stuff, so he has to ask me when he wants to access stuff anyway. He's 10, but once he goes to high school next year (omfg), he can have them, but I will keep an eye on his activity.

  • Your views sound similar to mine. Harry wanted FB early (his then step-brother and -sister both had it) so I permitted provided I had the password. I would log in, with him with me, from time to time. Then I stopped. I've always tried to have him hang out in communal areas not his room, so I have an idea how much he's using the net and what intensity. I've talked to him regularly about risks, threats, concerns. There's a forum I used a couple of years ago to get some advice on how best support him in a specific issue. He liked the site and I offered never to go back so he could use it and be open on there without mum spying. I'd love to go back and read, but never have/would.

    I have a hunch that checking up secretly on your kids (like my mum did to me - still smarting!) leads to less communication, or vice versa.

  • E is 10 next week and uses the laptop and her tablet to go on the internet, YouTube etc and has her phone which she uses for Instagram.  I have set her up on these so I know her settings are private and I set the username and passwords for them all.

    I have told her that I will check her online activity and do so regularly, I've also warned he of the dangers etc.

    When she was at her sleeping at her friends the other week her friend downloaded an app onto E's phone which enabled her to video call her friends, a bit like facetime and she dropped herself in it by saying that they had been up all night talking to two boys on her phone, which I didn't realise she had with her and then I caught her on it when she was in bed, so took the phone off her and a few times over the night, late on a couple of her friends were ringing her and I wasn't happy about it so I removed the app from her phone and told her she wasn't allowed to have it.

    I also make sure her tablet and her phone are out of her bedroom when she goes to bed and that's when I check her activity and she knows about it.

  • Wow SW, I suppose because mobiles weren't around until I was 18 I didn't realise how young all that stuff could start. That's a worry.

  • I know, I didn't have a mobile until I was about 18.  She hardly uses the phone to make calls or text, its more for Instagram and things like that.  I don't mind her being on Instagram but I made sure I follow her and her settings are private and I also regularly check who she is following and who is following her.  I was against it at first but I suppose you just have to move with the times and let them do it but make sure its safe and they know what they can and can't post etc.

  • Completely agree.

  • It is tough isn't it? It is We've set my daughter up with her own profile on our pc so she only has access to a limited amount of stuff. She's only 6 but once they'd taught her at school how to turn on the pc and search for things she was doing it unsupervised so we realised we had to prevent her accidentally finding things she shouldn't.

    We'll cross the next bridges when we come to them but I would monitor phone usage as they have so many ways of accessing technology its hard to keep up with it.

  • Yes. TBH I think you'd be a bit naive not to. I check and limit E's usage.

    I made the mistake of not checking her tab for a few days as I thought I had it locked down enough. She'd installed something called Kik and was chatting to her mates at the most ungodly hours and was also getting chat invites from random strangers. My friend is doing a degree in childcare and in the child protection module she's studying apparently Kik is one of the worst social platforms for grooming She does not have Kik any more (and will never have it again!).

    I've also had a massive fit at her for posting 'selfies' on Instagram. Yes the privacy setting is there but what if one of her mates gets the hump with her and decides to screen print her image and reshare it elsewhere. You simply do not have control of content that goes online (there was a hoo-har about what exactly Instagram can do with your images a while ago) which is why I stringently tell her that she HAS to learn to self censor. At 11 she just doesn't have a clue the repercussions her digital footprint might have in 10 years time. Another article on Kik/Instagram

    I also showed E this, so she uses her noodle about what she's putting out there on the WWW.

  • I probably would, yes.  The combination of the internet and kids scares the bejeesus out of me

  • KIK messaging app provides this cool feature where parents can spy on the online activity of there children!!
  • Most kiddos I know are more tech savvy than their parents. I'm afraid it's not possible to control their activity all the time. Yes, there are parental controls and physical limits that can be placed on devices and wifi, but these controls are not without gaps.
    I believe you can only warn them about the dangers of the web, like you talk with them about watching TV and reading news.

Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions