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Negativity?


Hi Ladies,

I just wanted to ask you a question really...have you encountered much negativity about having a larger family? Especially when announcing pgs or expressing a want for another child?

I currently have 2 lo's who are almost 4 and 2. We are TTC number 3 and I must say, I am suprised by some peoples reactions. I haven't told loads of people we are TTC, but if people ask me if I want another child then I tell them that we would like another child one day. In fact, the other night while I was having a christmas gathering that conversation cropped up and on the whole, people seemed to think we are a bit crazy for wanting 3 ''one day''. Even my family who absolutely idolise my children have made comments in the past. For me, I know it could have something to do with the fact I have had difficult pregnancies and suffered with PND...perhaps they are concerned for me. Also, I have been worried about that aspect myself so perhaps people are just picking up on my own doubts?? That makes sense to me, but on the whole- I just don't get it! My kids are happy, we have a nice house, my hubby has a good job (I was working part time until recently but lost my job) and I believe we can support another child so I'm not sure what the problem is.

There seems to be this thing about having more than 2 children....have you ladies found this? It does worry me that if we are blessed with another baby then people aren't going to give us very nice reactions when we announce another pregnancy...which makes me really sad!


xxxxx

Replies

  • Oh definitely, once you have more than the "normal" 2 children people start to think that they have the right to comment. Favourites include........
    Have you found out what causes it yet?
    Don't you have a t.v.?
    Was it planned?
    Havent you heard of contraception?
    Are you mad?
    Why would you have another one?

    The list goes on
  • As Hayley has said, we've had all of the above and worse comments when I was pregnant with number 3!!
    Don't let it put you off if it's what you want hun. It's hard with people being so negative sometimes but it's your family so what business is it of theirs anyway??
    Maybe we are all a bit mad? ha ha!!!! We can all be nutty together image x x x
    Lovely to see you over here btw hun. I hope you get you BFP very soon! x x x x x
  • I found that we had this reaction when we announced we were having our 3rd. I lost count of the people who asked if it was planned, and I found it really hurtful.
    Bizarrely though, once you have 3, people seem to assume that you are going to be the old woman who lived in the shoe, and keep on popping them out!!
    Loads of people asked me when were having another, and when I announced I was pregnant with our fourth, no-one asked if it was planned, they were all really supportive.
    As the other ladies have said, you just need to ignore people like that. I found myself questioning my parenting skills when people were asking if it was planned, but then I thought "sod em!". All my children are happy, sociable and polite children and I am very proud of them. They are the best thing that ever happened to me, and adding to my family has only made me happier.
    Good Luck TTC, and hope to see you on here again soon!!

    XXX
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