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Will i or won't i?


i hope someone out there will help me. My son is now 11 months old. as i am packing his little clothes away i am beginning to wonder if i will want another baby in the future. My friends baby is now 16 months old and she is 7 months pregnant with her next. I am enjoying my son so much i am wondering if i will feel a new baby in a year or 2 will get in the way of our relationship (not the best way of putting it i know). I fear that a new baby will take me away from him when i should be playing with him. I am spoilt with my son, he has always slept through the night, is never a great crier and is always happy and chatty, i adore him so much.

the thing is, i have so much love in me and i love babies,i am wondering if my body will tell me if/when i am ready for another baby. i am an only child myself which was great growing up. i know i dont need to decide now but am getting worried that maybe i wont want another baby when in my head i would ike another one later on (ive just turned 31). mu husband is not much use. he is a great dad and husband but says he doesnt know what he'll want in the future.

does anyone know what i mean and have either gone through this or going through it?

many thanks



  • hi there. i know exactly how you feel. i was like this with planning my 2nd. we fell pregnant when our first was 10 months old. i wanted them close together. 16 weeks ago we had our 5th baby. i was always worried that i wouldn' t love my 2nd as much as my first. but it just grew and i always had time for both of them, and now i have 5 it can be a juggling act but i spend individual time with them all every day. the way you are feeling is totally normal about having another one, but i have always found that there was never a good time to have another one and so just took the plunge each time to have another one. i know that for me when my children get to a year that i become broody again, but this time when archie reaches a year i hope that i can try to supress those feelings, but knowing me i will become broody for another baby!!!!
    good luck. take care.xxxx
  • congratulations pen, and thank you for telling me im normal ! I do hope these feelings go away and i'll magically 'know' when the time is right. Guess all i can do is wait and see.

    Many thanks and kindest regards
  • Hi

    My LO is only 10 weeks old and family members have started asking us when we're having the next!

    When hubby & I had previously discussed children we always talked about having 2 but now Spencer is here my hubby says he's happy with just 1. I don't understand, Spencer is such a good baby & is already sleeping through the night. I know there's a good chance that the next (if there is a "next") will be a nightmare but its a "risk" I'm willing to take.

    I wouldn't want another for at least a year but hubby's sudden change of heart has thrown me. I don't want to pressurise my hubby into something he's not happy with but equally I don't want to resent him for "denying" me another child. Its early days and hubby's opinion will probably change but its so confusing!!! Oh, I don't know.
  • I have three children there is a four year 11 month gap between babies one and two and a four year 6 month gap between babies two and three. The gap between the first two was totally planned.

    After the birth of our first hubby and i decided that we had our healthy daughter and would stick there during our first few years as a family of three we travelled and our lo girl now nearly ten was our world could not imagine feeling this much love for another.

    One morning i decided that i wanted another baby our dd was about to start full time school within the year and i wanted her to have a brother or sister so along came baby number two after a month of ttc...

    After the birth of our second dauhter i wanted needed to add to our family again but nature had a different view and it took a full four years five month till little Archie was born he has fitted into our family fantastically we could not be happier. The age gap does have its advantages as well as its disadvantages but all three of my children are happy and that is all that matters...

    From someone that could only ever see herself with one child i now have three all planned. They are all loved as much as each other. I would love to have a fourth but hubby feels our family is complete and i do agree..
    Good luck with your choices Vicky
  • The best advice I can give is keep al your baby stuff till ur sure. When I had my son (now 6) I decided I definately wanted no more kids- I didn't think I could 'divide' my love fairly and as grew up with brother 13 months older who was the favourite by a mile-knew how it felt to be left out a bit. So I gave all my baby stuff away.

    I got 'caught' pregnant with my daughter when my son was 2 and I was TERRIFIED!! I was desperate for a girl but worried at the same time as to how my son wud cope and if I wud have a favourite. I had too buy everything new

    I decided when my daughtercame along I was happy with one of each sex and would have no more so I gave her baby stuff to charity.

    I am now 25weeks pregnant (planned this time!!!) with number three and have had to go out and buy EVERYTHING AGAIN
  • Hiya - i think everyone must ask themselves the same question - i know i did, my son Lewis is 4 months old and he is a good little boy sleeps all nite etc, i have thought about another baby but am like you Vicki and want to enjoy being with him and want to focus all my attention on him and most mums say there love is the same for all babies but i can say its not, the first will always be loved that bit more, am the 3rd in a family of four and my oldest brother is just the bees knees in my mums eyes!
    I pack all Lewis stuff away and then think ok if i have another baby - i want it to be a girl so none of this stuff is going to be any use any way - but i dont want to part with it or sell it on ebay lol, its the sentimental value lol! I would like another baby but am just going to leave it am not on the pill or anything but saying that sex has been quite non excistant since Lewis was born (am just too tired lol) and if it happens it happens!
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