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IVF doubts/nerves/2nd thoughts???

I'm jumping the gun here as we haven't been told for certain we will need ivf to concieve but with hubs v.poor sperm analysis i think it will be our only hope and we'll hopefully find out in 2weeks when go back for his results at the fertility clinic.

When we first starting having fertility tests done i was certain if ivf was needed for us to have a child then i do it with out a 2nd thought, but now i'm beginning to talk myself out of it, more so because i don't know how i would cope if it didn't work??

Did anyone else feel like this, is it normal to have doubts or were you 100% certain you wanted to put yourself through the ivf process??


  • Hi Vickster long time no speak. I've been trying to spend less time in the forums and more time trying to have a life!! ttc took over most of last year not letting it do the same this year!!!

    I've had the same doubts about going through treatment I think it's only natural to doubt the unknown. At one point I thought I should forget it all and just wait a year and start the adoption process... but then you'll always have the what if or could you live your life child free?

    Another way to think on it... you've got through knowing there is a problem if someone had said to you when you first started ttc that this is the way it's going to be you'd be having the same kind of doubts about even trying,thinking you maybe wouldn't be strong enough but you've got this far. The waiting for results and going through the tests is really the hard bit. Ivf isn't going to be a barrel of laughs and theres the possibility it wont work (and you wonder how'd you'd get through it,but then theres been days where you didn't think you could get through the diagnosis but did,you always find a way in the end)... but then there's every chance it will and if it does the reward for going through it is going to be so great because of all you've gone through.

    that's turned into a bit of a ramble sorry,it probably wont help you very much either I'm not sure if it makes sense to anyone but me!!

    I think once you've had your appointment in 2 weeks and you know fully what your dealing with you'll feel much better.
  • Thanks wibblewobble, it wasn't a ramble but a very good perspective on things!!

    I think waiting for hubs test results is just putting a strain on things at the minute and I've been doing rather to much googling and seeing too many negative outcomes for people, just have to tell myself everyone is different and that our luck has to change sometime!

    I think last night was particularly bad after spending an hour with my friends gorgeous 11week old little girl yesterday, I want one too!!!

    I know I'd regret it if we didn't at least try, but as you said hopefully when we know where we stand properly i'll feel better about things!
  • Yes, my head was all over the place prior to IVF. Doubts about whether it was the right thing to do and also ow I'd cope if it didn't work. In a way, putting it off, kind of meant that I still felt there was hope.

    Anyway, in the end, you have to rationalise it. You're right; you don't want to get to an age when it is no longer a viable option. You need to try it now when your chances of success are much better.

    BTW, I'm now 14 weeks pregnant following our first attempt at ICSI [and I have two frosties for an FET in the future, if we want]. So there is no reason to think it won't work when the time comes. GOOD LUCK!
  • Thanks Bubblicious, glad to know these feelings are normal and huge congratulations to you, its lovely to see a successful 1st attempt image
  • Hello

    Ivf is a huge thing and people who havent been in your situation cant understand the stress. If it does turn out to be the route you go down, it can work first time. I have a 16 week old daughter following our first attempt at ivf.

    Good luckx
  • hey there

    i just wanted to add i have done ivf twice. unfortunately didn't work for me however i have egg problems but i know people that's it worked for first go!. . it does happen. .

    as for the stress and worries yes it will happen but ttc is bloody stressful lol. . once your in mid flow it will be like second nature to

    you. . and becomes part of your life for six to eight weeks.

    its totally manageable and worth a shot to get your baby!

    i say good luck and if that's a route you need go for it! cos

    it does work for some ladies, x x
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