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Terrified with my high expectations
Hi ladies,
I’m a 35 year old solicitor living in Australia.
my husband and I are about to start our very first round of IVF in September this year after shopping around for a doctor we really liked and trusted. I became pregnant at 19 by accident and chose not to have the baby because I believed at the time it would have disrupted my education, my social life and with my parents being the strict Chinese kind would have most probably disowned me. Now I am at an age where I know my husband and I are finally ready. But I’m not going to lie and say it doesn’t kill me inside when I see another one of my girlfriends have a baby. I feel so inadequate and lonely. I’m someone who has always tried my best to be a high achiever in life, but yet, what should be the most natural and beautiful process a human being can ever experience I feel is lost to me. That I failed. I’m so so very scared to start the IVF. What if that fails too? I’m not a religious person, but is some entity out there is punishing me now for the choice I made when I was 19? Have any of you ever felt this way?
I’m a 35 year old solicitor living in Australia.
my husband and I are about to start our very first round of IVF in September this year after shopping around for a doctor we really liked and trusted. I became pregnant at 19 by accident and chose not to have the baby because I believed at the time it would have disrupted my education, my social life and with my parents being the strict Chinese kind would have most probably disowned me. Now I am at an age where I know my husband and I are finally ready. But I’m not going to lie and say it doesn’t kill me inside when I see another one of my girlfriends have a baby. I feel so inadequate and lonely. I’m someone who has always tried my best to be a high achiever in life, but yet, what should be the most natural and beautiful process a human being can ever experience I feel is lost to me. That I failed. I’m so so very scared to start the IVF. What if that fails too? I’m not a religious person, but is some entity out there is punishing me now for the choice I made when I was 19? Have any of you ever felt this way?
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