Advice...please?!

LavenderL · Oct 20, 2009 8:06AM

Hi all,

I am looking for some advice on home births as I am in a bit of a pickle! $:\$ ?

My fianc???? and I are expecting our 1st baby in April and we are moving from the UK to Holland in October. I have been reading up on giving birth in Holland and they prefer home births over there, with pregnancy seen as a natural process rather than a medical condition - they do not believe in pain relief unless there are complications. It seems the only form of pain relief if you are able to have a hospital birth is an epidural, but these are often only available during office hours with smaller hospitals. Gas and Air is not available in Holland at all. The ante-natal on how to cope with the pain through breathing and yoga are available but we will be living in a small town and classes in English are over 2 hours away, I'm afraid I won't be able to learn Dutch in time!

I have always liked the idea of a water birth at home but thought I would at least have the G&A to help me through! I guess we could buy a TENS machine before we move, do these really help with the pain? Can anyone give me some advice about what home births (especially for the 1st child) are like and how important pain relief really is?!

Sorry for the long post and thanks for reading!

Any help would we greatly appreciated as I really am terrified!!!

NF xxx

7tob · Sep 20, 2009 1:41PM

Personally i would really like gas and air to be an option, although i gave birth to my last baby without any pain relief it wasn't through choice, he just came too quick and he was my 5th baby!
I had just turned 18 when i had my first baby and it was in a hospital and i was petrified but looking back it is never that bad.
I tried a tens machine on my 4th birth (home birth) and found it didn't help me at all and in the end annoyed me so i stopped using it!
Obviously everyone is different though and some women may swear by them. Definatly breathing properly through your contractions help a lot and i've only had 1 baby in water again not through choice but i found looking back it did help with the pain.
Not sure if any of this will help, i can only tell you from my experiences but if you'd like to know anything else just ask. xxxxxxxxxx

michelle 8+3 with no6

secret_me · Sep 20, 2009 4:39PM

I thought I really needed the G&A and when the midwife arrived with it I was in the "oh my god, perhaps I want to go to hospital and be knocked out til it's over" stage, apparently this is the transition. The G&A brought everything back on the right side of bearable but wasn't amazing. After 2 contractions it ran out. I found once I was in the pool I could just puff and pant my way through the contractions anyway. It's scary though and it's nice to know there's something there to help. I heard that the fear is worse than the pain, which makes sense now I've done it. The pain goes between contractions, it's not like an injury pain, so if you can relax between, rather than worrying and dreading the next one then you should be ok. Whatever you decide to do the Dutch attitude of "birth is natural" is probably the most sensible attitude to have, if you can convince yourself... and just keep in mind, it does end, and with your baby in your arms it's all worth it pretty damn quickly!

michelle07-79314 · Sep 21, 2009 3:42PM

I had my 1st baby at home in a birth pool and found it a really good experience!! and I had my 4th baby 5 months ago at home in a pool too!!

All I can say is child birth is really not that bad!! fear only makes it worse!!

With my last baby i used a TENSmachine and did find it helped I also used aromatherapy oils in a burner which i also found help to relax me and helped with th pain!!

I know it sound stupid but the best pain relief (i have found) it to try to relax through each contration. As each contrartion comes on you tense and if you can stop and relax you can feel your body opening up! which feels fantastic!! and being at home maeks you more relaxed any way.

And water is brilliant as a form of pain relief!!

I hope this helped
xx

LavenderL · Sep 24, 2009 5:58AM

Thanks so much for all your advice, feeling a lot less terrified now!

What oils did you use in the burner? Is there certain types to use or anything that should be avoided?

Thanks again
xx

michelle07-79314 · Sep 25, 2009 12:36PM

During labour i used lavender and that was good but they say clary sage is better? but i had used all my clary sage up trying to induce labour

but i still went 10 days over

lol x

mummabear-72331 · Sep 26, 2009 1:08PM

Have you thought or heard of hypnobirthing? If you are feeling terrified about giving birth, and doing so at home, then I couldnt recommend this enough. You can read up on it here: http://www.hypnobirthing.co.uk/

I used to be absolutely terrified about the whole thing and a few things lead me to explore hypno and we went on the course. It was excellent and I no longer have any fear, plus we have booked a natural home water birth for our first. A far cry from my original plan of "just knock me out and wake me up when it's over"!! I actually cannot wait for the whole thing and Ive felt so relaxed for months now, without a snippet of fear. Although my family and friends thought we were crazy for our decision (they just don't understand!) we actually think it would be crazy to do it any other way!!

Our teacher was Dutch funny enough. She was excellent.

Yoga is good too so thats great you are looking into that as the breathing is important and yoga is a great way to get you in shape for it.

Pain relief does not need to be in the form of drugs, contrary to the more popular belief. In fact, IMO, they can create more problems! So i would advise to work on your fears first, then everything else will start to fall into place. Giving birth is such a natural thing and it need not be painful or full of fear. The less fear you have the less pain you will experience as you will be less tense.

xx

seraphina68 · Sep 26, 2009 1:14PM

LMAO Michelle, I tried to induce labour with clary sage too! It stank! I remember burning frankincense too buut can't remember what that was meant to do...

LavenderL · Oct 1, 2009 1:41PM

I've looked into Hypnobirthing in Holland and it looks like its going to option!

Just waiting to hear back about the classes and also trying to organise a midwife but it might take some time!

mummabear-72331 · Oct 1, 2009 2:12PM

That's awesome! You have plenty of time. I went on the course at 26wks which was earlier than others on my course who were 28,30, 34.
Im sure you will enjoy it and it will help you make your birth more pleasurable!
xx
34+2

LavenderL · Oct 2, 2009 6:07AM

I hope so! I am looking forward to learning more about it, so my fear is now alot less than it was!

Sarahboo · Oct 20, 2009 8:06AM

Just to reiterate what Sim75 has said, I had a hypnobirth at home 6 weeks ago when I gave birth to my little girl and managed with no pain relief at all.
I literally just had lavender oil burning, a birthing pool and used the breathing techiques I learnt at my hypnobirthing classes. I cannot recommend it highly enough and although I did feel some pain it wasnt as bad as I thought it would be.

You should get the book with the course if you book on one but Id say you'd be better getting one now so you can do your research its a fascinating read as well! Its called 'Hypnobirthing by Marie Mongan'. You could probably pick up a cheap second hand one on ebay or amazon.

I think the main reason I felt as much pain as I did was because I didnt do the course early enough and didnt practice the breathing for long enough-I was very lucky and got it free due to a local midwife having recently qualified and was 32 weeks-so the earlier the better in my opinion.
Good luck and enjoy it! x

Advice...please?!

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