section

hi everyone never been on site or forum before but thought I would try it out, I have son who will be 4 in july and had a terrible labour ended up a crash section which the epidural didnt work so felt everything until they put me under a general. was in hospital for a long time after as had multiple infections and damage inside as it was so rushed, it was 3 days before i could hold my son and a week til i could give him a bottle (i tried to breastfeed but my body didnt produce milk due to the trauma), i am happy to say even after that i bonded amazing with him had no post natal depression, he is the best thing that ever happened to me. I am now 39 weeks pregnant and was told I could try again naturally but have just found out I have a brain condition which is why the epidural didint work so if I fail to progress it will be a section under general, which is quite gutting tryin everything I can to start labour naturally as cant get induced also not allowed pain relief during labour due to condition. basically wanting to know if anyone has had any similar experiances as quite scared bout getting the general and feel a bit let down that its my fault labour went so wrong? my husband is hugely supportive but doesnt understand why i am bothered bout having a planned general.