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Awful experience and thinking about trying for no2??

I had hyperemesis during my pregnancy and was constantly in hosp and vomited 24/7 until 7monyhs pregnant, I then went the full 14 days over and had to be started and nothing happened until the lady told me my baby was back to back... And then my waters broke and they put me on a drip... Then the contractions were unbearable image I then progressed quickly and I pushed for over an hour and then my baby was delivered by vacum in which resulted in a rare clot on his head but he's fine now.. My husband wants no2 n so do I if I didn't have to carry or give birth just don't think I'd cope with the same again?...

Replies

  • Hi

     

    Totally understnad your concerns.  Do you have the opportunity to discuss with a midwife before ttc?  Maybe arrange through your gp.

    I don't know if it is a condition you would definitely or likely have second time around but they could surely guide you better.

    x

  • I think if your asking then your not completely sure. YOU need to be completely sure and if your not (by the sounds of it ur not) then ur husband should be supportive and understand your decision. 

    I had a very traumtic time when i had my ds 3 years ago an i thought id NEVER want another baby and now im 6-8 weeks with my second because i know im ready now. 

    I ended up suddenly getting eclampsia through my labour (never had pre eclampsia) an it was really serious i was so close to fitting but somehow because my son was os far down i had to push him out myself which luckily took me 40 minutes then i ended up with a very near 3rd degree tear an then i ended up with a severe water infection an had febrile convulsions an my son was born with severe reflux and no one would listen that he wasnt well for 6 weeks! by then he was under a dr in the hospital an on 2 lots of medication an then i ended up with severe post natal depression ended up in my relationship with my sons dad breaking down. My HV was crap at the time an it took me over 3 months to be even seen by someone to put me on medication to start me getting back to normal. So as you can see not a walk in the park and you do definately need to be sure with yourself first, dont be feeling guilty just because your OH wants another baby hun, you wont always be unsure and he should support you through this. 

    Ok, im not, not worried at all of course i am but they are allowed due to the situation i was in last time but i know im sure i want this baby i just want to make sure i ahve the support and what i need incase anything goes wrong again xxx

     

    I hoep this has helped somewhat xx

  • Kind of read your post wrong but if your unsure try getting some info beforehand and then see if having yourself put at ease will help you but if your not 100% sure then maybe wait til you are xx

  • Hi xxmumxx , I can totally relate to how you're feeling. I had a hard time with my first, that made me very ill afterwards and as a result I had PND. It took me a long time to get my head around thinking of no.2 but knew I'd always regret it if I didn't have another baby. It takes healing time both mentally and physically, so just keep talking with your oh and seek advice from wherever you can get it ... I'm now almost 6 weeks with my second and am trying to keep focused on the fact that no two pregnancies or births are the same, still petrified but trying to stay calm (sort of!) x
  • Teapot and Laura that's great advice.

    You have to be ready.  I think what finally convinced me was that as Teapot says, every pregnancy and labour is different,  I will likely need a c section which I can plan for and my want for another baby has gotten so strong that if it came to it, for that baby to be safe I would go through the same experience again. 

    (NEVER EVER THOUGHT I WOULD SAY THAT!)

    There is something in surviving a difficult time that gives you an inner strength and self belief  - this you mgiht not feel yet but it will come.

    The odds are in our favour with second babies and we also have the knowledge of the support we need after which we can try to set up in advance too.  I think it would be worse to have had a good first labour followed by a subsequent complicated one.  It would be a bigger knock as you would be expecting the same as the first.  Whereas first time you have no idea, no benchmark.

    Give yourself plenty of time x

  • TulipRose I know quite a few ladies who had a bad time first time around and ended up with emergency csections and have had subsequent babies by elective csections and they said how wonderful it was knowing everything was planned for and a lot calmer and found it a really positive experience.



    I don't know what my options will be this time around as despite all the complications I still had what they term a 'natural' birth ... I just know that an epidural will not be an option! I'm trying to be blissfully ignorant about it until later on down the line otherwise I just won't enjoy the pregnancy for stressing x
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