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Floopy's Birth story - WARNING: GRAPHIC

Hi Ladies

WARNING: IF YOU ARE A FIRST TIME MUM TO BE I REALLY ADVISE NOT READING THIS!!! If I had read this before I gave birth, I would have been scared to death...
Well here goes. Firstly, going past your due date is really demoralising I found, especially when you've been told by everyone, 'ther's no way you're going full term with the size you are!' So to be more than a week overdue in the hot weather wasn't great, but manageable.

I went into labour at 0045am on the morning of my 8th day overdue Monday (having had a sweep the previous Thursday - painful & unsuccessful. It is true what everyone says, you do just know when it''s labour because the pain is so intense and different to the annoying period type pains I'd been experiencing for 2 weeks! Contractions started at about 12 mins apart and got stronger and more regular for about 6 hours - got to about 6 mins apart. Unfortunately, they then became really irregular again, going from every 2-3 mins to the next one 20 mins! I managed until late morning when I told my husband that I had to go in to the hospital (I had phoned them earlier that morning & now called them again to say that I wasn't coping). We got to the hospital & contractions were still irregular, but bloody painful. They examined me & told me I was only 2cms - gutted. Options were - go home & stick it out until contractions were regular again at 2-3mins apart, have a bath and take paracetamol. Sooo, had to go home again in agony!

By the time I got home (lunchtime) the contractions were even more irregular (varying from 4 mins to 30!). Carried on like that for the rest of the day and into the night when they seemed to get more regular again. I got in the bath at about 0200am on the Tuesday morning, but I have to say I found it harder to cope with the contractions in there. I was extremely exhausted by this point and starting to get to the point where I genuinely didn't know what to do with myself anymore. We had been awake since the Sunday morning really (having only had a couple of hours sleep that Sunday night before the contractions started). I was desperate. I managed to hang on until about 6am ish, by which point my contractions were so strong I knew I had to go back in to hospital even though my contractions still weren't very regular (about 6 mins - 9 mins apart). I told my husband we had to go, even though he was convinced that we would be sent home again.

I phoned the hospital and told them I was coming in again. When we got there, all I remember saying to the midwife was, 'please don't send me home again!' She examined me and told me I was 4 cms - thank god... now I could have some pain relief. She gave me gas and air - omg what marvellous stuff. Doesn't take the pain away at all, but somehow helps you to deal with it much better. My contractions then decided to get quite regular again (every 3-4mins) at which point I asked for an epidural. I had always said through my entire pregancy that I wouldn't have one, but the best piece of advice I was given was to go in with an open mind about your delivery because you don't know how you are going to cope. The anaesthetist was called and arrived in about 20 mins. He gave me the epidural which felt like heaven - at which point I remember telling him that if I hadn't already married my husband I'd marry him!!!! lol.

From that point on, I actually started to enjoy my labour. I was told to sleep because I was so exhausted that I would need to build up my energy for later on when I needed to push the baby out. I laboured for the rest of the day (3 shifts of midwives) - my contractions had started to back off again, so they broke my waters for me and gave me Syntocin to speed things along a bit.By 7pm, I was still only 5cms! Then things moved along quite rapidly - I went from 5cms to 9.5cms in an hour! They then gave me another hour to get to 10cms and then told me to start pushing. I found the pushing exhausting, but exhilirating at the same time. Unfortunately, every time I pushed, the baby's heart rate was dropping (which it is supposed to do), but not recovering quickly enough. They decided to let me push for about 10 mins more, and then got the doctors in to have a look. The conclusion was that the cord must be wrapped around the baby's neck, stopping his heart rate recovering. He had also shifted so that he was back-to-back. I had to go into theatre to have a ventouse or possibly a caesarean. I was whizzed down to surgery where they gave me an episiotomy and two pushes later and Ethan had arrived (1106pm). They delivered him onto my tummy as I had asked and he cried - good. The cord had been wrapped around his neck and his body! They then whisked him away to be cleaned up because he was so mucky (there had been meconium in my waters). I was then told that I had torn next to the episiotomy - I had a third degree tear! They then spent the next 40 mins stitching me up. I had to go to recovery afterwards as I had had so much anaesthetic. I found the surgery very traumatic - the doctors and nurses were fantastic, I just found the whole thing frightening and I was disappointed at the way my labour had ended. It's such a shame I tore.

I was then taken to the post natal ward with Ethan (my husband had to go home). At this point, I have to say that everyone on the Delivery Suite was superb. I cannot praise them highly enough. However, being on the ward was one of the most horrendous experiences of my life. I was left totally alone (0420am) with my baby, no husband and without a clue what to do. No-one showed me how to feed, etc. I was supposed to be checked every hour due to the surgery; they checked me once! I had a catheta (sp) in and found it difficult to pick Ethan up etc. Needless to say, I did everything in my power to go home by that nightime - was discharged at 10pm that day (Wednesday).

Ethan was 6lbs 10ozs, which was small considering I was so far overdue. The midwives have concluded since that my placenta must have stopped functioning properly a few weeks before and so he was hungry in the womb - poor little fella. Since the birth we have both had a number of problems (I won't go into too much detail with this as you all must be totally bored if you haven't given up reading by now).
1. Ethan was jaundiced quite badly - ended up being tested in the NICU but worked out on its own in the end.
2. Ethan was born with a tongue tie which meant he could only feed in short bursts - the tongue tie was cut 10 days after birth, but I am still struggling to get him to feed for longer times (he needs to re-learn), which means he wants to feed nearly all the time and doesn't ever really settle for more than an hour.
3. As I was on antibiotics due to the third degree tear, I got nipple thrush (never had thrush in my life) which I then of course gave to Ethan - poor chap.
4. Trying to feed sitting up all the time on a third degree tear isn't easy.
5. I burst a stitch in my tear (god knows how) and so this hasn't been healing well although seems to be on track now.
6. I then had a massive gush of blood (16 days post natal) and a huge clot came out - sorry tmi! Cause = an infection in my uterus (probably caused by a bit of membrane being left behind in my uterus). So now I'm BACK on antibiotics and have been told that the nipple thrush will probably return as a result - great...

Good news is that Ethan is thriving - put on loads of weight since birth - midwives reckon he's making up for being hungry in the womb! I'm struggling I have to say - the relentless feeding and not settling is very hard - but I'm clinging to the fact that everyone keeps telling me what a good job I'm doing and that, 'it will get easier.' Can't wait for that to happen.

Sorry that was so long, though believe me, I could have included way more detail lol image

Everyone says you'll forget the pain, but I haven't yet and right now I don't possibly see how I could have anymore children - I'm sure that will all change in time.

Floopy & Ethan

Replies

  • Congrats on lo and welcome Ethan.
    Kerry and Freya
  • Hi Floopy,

    Well done sweetheart, after what you've been through you deserve heaps of praise and a bit of old fashioned good luck!

    Take care of yourself...
  • congrats hun, you birth was very very like mine, you do for get the pain hun, i couldnt even pick millie up for 2 weeks, i was that brusied off the epidurial and the tear, millie is only 1 and im 7 weeks pregnant with my second, so you will forget the pain, good luck hope you feel better soon xx
  • Hey there, congratulations on the birth of your little boy.

    I had near enough the same labour as you (apart from the fact I was induced). The cord was wrapped around mt little girls neck and every time I pushed her, her heartrate was going down just like yours. They told me they where going to try the forceps first, which thankfully worked. They cut me and I tore too, so I had a thrid degree tear too, which I will totally agree with you its agnoy, my midwife told me tearing and being cut is more pain than having a C-Section, I couldn't say if it is coz I've never had a C-Section. My stitches split too. It took me about 2 months to heal and at the time I said I would never have another baby, but my daughter is now 13 months and we're ttc again.

    I have never forgot about the pain (after the labour) and I dont think I ever will. Since having my daughter I have always said I want a section again and if I ever do fall pregant again I think I would still ask them if they'll section me coz I dont want to go through all that pain again.

    I could go on about other problems I had (still have) since giving birth but I dont want to scare you.

    It will get better but I'm sorry to say it does take time. xxx
  • Awww hun sounds like you had an awful time. Like you I never anticipated just HOW bad the pain would be. It was awful! I had an emergency caesarean as my baby was a lot bigger than yours at 9lb 1oz and was stuck but i did have gas and air and an epidural which were amazing. Like you I havent forgotten the pain, I dont think I ever will. Congratulations on baby Ethan anyway, I am sure he is so worth everything. You just sound like you need a break! Have you thought of giving him a bottle - sorry if you don't like the idea. x
  • I had traumatic birth of my first (she was breech) i delivered her naturally but with long long labour, hours of pushing, 2 failed forcep attempts (last one worked) and cut and huge tear which involved 47 stitches in and out!!!!!!!!!! However, I went on to have 4 more kids!!!!!!! Just thought would share that though I have never forgotton the pain even though it was 17 years ago you do get over it and get on.
    I had 4 normal (well normalish) deliveries and then a section a few months ago.
    Cant truthfully say that the section tho easier at the time is much much harder to get over and I would have 100 births like my first compared to the section. Its the fact you just cant lift, move, drive etc.... the pain is no worse but the limits are.

    good luck all those TTC or those about to have a baby. My middle 3 births were Ok so 3 out of 5 not bad!!!!!!!!!!

    d xxx
  • Thanks for posting your story floopy - and for the warning as well!

    I've got 3 weeks left till my due date - i'm nervous about the birth but like you said i'm going in with a totally open mind and although I'd rather not have an epidural - if the pain is as bad as you mums say it is I think I may be changing my mind!

    Think you did brilliantly - congrats to you and welcome to baby Ethan!

    Lisa
    xx
  • Wow Floopy, congratulations on the birth of Ethan and well done, it sounds like you did fantastically during a difficult delivery.

    xxx
  • Wow! Well done you! I had Jack 7 months ago, but had no labour. I was admitted with pre-eclampsia at 39 weeks, with a view to being induced. They scanned me after a VE, and found Jack was breech (bum engaged), so I had an emergancy caesarian 6 hours later. Because I'd felt very detached from the birth (NO contractions AT ALL), I got PND for bout 4 weeks, but happy to say all recovered now. However, your story sounds far worse, and I think you are amazing for coming through the other side of it!!! Well done, congratulations, and believe me it DOES get easier I promise x x x
  • Hi ladies

    Thanks for all your lovely replies and words of encouragement. I'm sure you're all right and I'll go on to have loads more kids. Ethan is having a grumbly night so we're sat here listening to music to calm him down!!!

    Hope I didn't scare anyone who's pregnant!

    Floopy
  • i'm gatecrashing i'm nearly 30 weeks with my first all i can say is eeeeeeeek haha xx

    princess+millie 29+4
  • Hey- im due to have my first baby in about 7wks, i know you warned not too but really had to read more!
    You are really brave to be carrying on as you are and im positive you will look back on this one day and it wont seem half as bad.
    I have to admit the birth has been worrying me, but if women such as yourself can have such hard times and get through it that really gives my confidence as cases like this are really rare.
    Chin up and congrats on baby Ethans process. If im half as brave and determined as you clearly are- i know i will cope.
  • Hi Tammy

    Thanks for your lovely comments - you made me cry!!! Still a bit emotional and teary - think it's the tiredness.

    Ethan is now 8lbs (weighed yesterday) so has put on 1lb 6ozs since he was born (3 weeks) - midwives can't believe his growth rate. He's still feeding every hour, but the midwives assure me that he will settle into a much more manageable pattern soon. I'm recovering (slowly) - finish the new course of antibiotics on friday so hopefully I'll be sorted soon.

    Good luck with your birth/delivery. You're right - cases like mine are rare and I've just been incredibly unlucky so I know your's will be much better.

    Floopy & Ethan
  • Who ever said pregnancy, birth & parenting was easy they were lying through their teeth!
    Well done to you, you've done marvellously for what you went through & it will get easier!! I was demented for the 1st 4 weeks of my daughter's life but she's 3 months old now & yes I still have days where I want to scream or run away but then she smiles & it's all worth it.
    xx
  • Congratulations to you on baby ethan. Sounds very much like my first labour 12 years ago but believe me you will forget in time, my first labour was 45 hours and my second third were 4 1/2 hours my fourth was only 1 hr 50mins, it will be a breeze next time. xx
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