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Controlled crying, does it actually work??

Hi Gemma,

Welcome to PP.

My 2 year old is only just starting to sleep through and my 5 year old didn't sleep through until he was 3.

I tried the controlled crying with Charlotte but for us it didn't work. She would cry so much she'd make herself sick so we would have to go in to change her and her bedding. After 2 nights I left it.

That's just my experience. I know people who have done it and it has worked to there advantage. It's always worth a try.

Zoe xx


  • give it a go if you can, just leave her for a few minutes if you can bear it. All babies are different some are more clingy than others, but it is great idea to teach them to sleep by themselves asap! I did with all mine, they can get off to sleep fine for naps and bedtime its just keeping them there thats the hard bit for me!

    I read the baby whisperer (Tracy Hogg) which is brilliant and more gentle approach. I used her EASY routine on Tate and it worked well. I love routines especially if you only have one child makes the days easier. Its a bit harder when you have a newborn and a toddler with a busy social calender!
  • Hi gemma, i'm with nicola on the baby whisperer book! Its brilliant. I personally wouldn't do controlled crying myself but have read that it does get results so maybe its a worth a try. My only advice is only do something you are happy with and that you feel is right for you x x Good luck x
  • ooh I meant to say there is also a difference between a baby having a little grumble as they try and get off to sleep and full blown scream. I don't think I could ever leave a screaming baby. But luka at his naptimes may take 10mins or so of grumbling and gentle crying to himself as he gets off to sleep.
  • Yes thats right, jd makes little creaky noises and grizzles a bit but thats just him going off to sleep. It was so hard to work all this out when i first had him but that book really helped me work out all the different cries and how to sort everything out. Nicola think your the only person i know thats read it, some of my other friends think reading baby books are daft
  • I thought it was a great book, did you ever see any of her programmes on living tv? They were great they were on maybe 2 or 3 years ago. When I had Tate I felt like a first time mum as there was a big gap between him and tom. So i used to read anything to help!! Unfortunately Tracy Hogg passed away a year or two ago she had cancer she came across as such a lovely lady in her programmes. Her books are great and the routines mad sense to me (much easier than Gina Ford)
  • No i didn't see them and didn't realise she passed away? She seems lovely in her books. I've gina ford too which i read and get ideas from especially the weaning one
  • i tried conrolled crying with josh(now 6), he screamed for 5 hours for 3 nights in a row, my neightbour rang the police on the 3rd night as she thought i had been leaving him on his own! so i sat with him on the first night and each night moved nearer to the door until he had fell asleep eventually until i was 'sat outside the door' which i never was as he was usually asleep anyway! it only took about a week, i think he was reassured that i was close if he needed me
  • 'Personally' I think anything that leaves your child crying on its own doesn't work and is wrong. I love Tracy Hogg (Baby Whisperer) but don't get me started on Gina Ford!!!

    Settling them to sleep whilst you are there and when they feel comfortable and secure is much better than leaving them to cry alone.
  • i wasnt going to mention that womans name in my post as she makes my blood boil!!!!
  • It is a bit about getting in tune with your baby and working out their cries. Gina ford is more straightforward but is very strict I think. I couldn't implement the routines as they were so regimented and couldnt do that when I had another child and had to be places at certain times. With Tracy Hogg as long as you do things in the correct order which is EASY - Eat - Activity - Sleep - You time it doesn't matter what time of day it is they actually eat or sleep or how regularly. This suited our family better.
  • It gives you a plan that you can follow roughly and it really works as i did it with jd. If you want i'll try and find book and note it down for you so you can see?
  • Quote:

    i wasnt going to mention that womans name in my post as she makes my blood boil!!!!

    So glad I'm not alone in my thinking!!
  • I have tried control crying with my daughter when she was about 1 and it worked. I have to say that you must apply common sense and compassion. It is not a case of letting your child just scream their head off, if you are sensible it can work.Never had to try this method with my son.Good luck in whichever approach you decide to take.
  • Controlled crying doesnt work for us either, Hollie will also hold her breath or make herself sick. so we dont use it, luckily she isnt too hard to get to bed but at the moment is waking several times at night in pain with her teeth. I would like to read that baby whisperer book though as it does sound good. xx
  • hi gemma
    It worked for me when i did it with my 7 mnonth old (he's 4 now)It was really hard as i felt guilty letting him cry but i was never very far away. It's tough going but i would recommend it. Never had to do it with my daughter who's 20 months she just loves her sleep bless her.
    Good luck. Once you start keep going and you'll get there hun x
  • hi thought i'd share my opinion too! i did controlled crying on isabel when she was about 7 months old and she took to it like duck to water! i said i wouldn't go through with if she screamed but she never did! i used to sit quietly for 5 or 10 mins to settle her and calm her then put her in cot kiss her and walk out. she'd moan on and off for ten mins 1st couple of nights butt after that she was fine! unless she was ill or teething but then u make acceptions! good luck with it and let us no how it goes!
  • i may sound a little thick but what is controlled crying?
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