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what hacks me off. . .

hey ladies. .

Gosh if i hear another person say to me try and relax it will happen naturally once more i will go crazy! Fact mine ain't gonna happen naturally that's why am having ivf : ) in may. . Its more annoying when it comes from someone newly pregnant who has only been tryin a couple months! Ah lol. . Try relaxing after two years! Sorry rant Over. . Its not am obsessive about trying to get pregnant but when ttc for long time. . Perhaps wouldn't be obsessive if got bfp after few months. .sorry if sounds like moaning but i am he he x X


  • I'm totally with u on this one!! People dont understand unless they are in this situation u can never be positive all the time u need to be realistic with the situation ur in.

    if u don't mind me asking how long have u been waiting for IVF for? I start clomid on my next cycle and I'm so worried it won't work!

  • Oh my goodness I totally agree. If my mil tells me one more time not to think about it I think I will punch her!!
  • oh god people really dont understand what we are going through!

    I sometimes get to the point where I really want to spill it out that I can't have babies easilty and naturally!
  • What is it with MIL's?!? Mine just doesn't listen when I talk about my problems. Then says "oh, I completely believe you would get pregnant as soon as you stop thinking about it" Hmmm, yes, because the cysts in my ovaries are a figment of my imagination!!! If I stop thinking about them, they will go away!
  • Hi booey I am not in your situation but just wanted to say I agree with you I had always heard relaxing, eating healthy etc improves people's chances of conceiving however when I got pregnant 6 momths ago I was having the most stressful and busy month of my life at work, was eating really badly, arguing with my husband and feeling really down. I remember bursting into tears for no reason when out for a meal with hubby around the time I got pregnant, ihadn't felt that low in a long time. It was a horrible month and did not even cross my mind that I could be pregnant as I had not been looking after myself atall or bd much so didn't think it was possible, so didn't even do a test until af was 3 weeks late.

    Im not saying being relaxed etc doesn't help some people conceive but if someone has internal problems such as cysts on their ovaries no amount of relaxation will help them conceive. It is unfair for people to make out that it's your fault for not relaxing when that's clearly not true. Anyway just wanted to say good luck with whatever you choose I hope u get your bfp soon.

    G x
  • ah thanks all and summerbeanimage

    yea it is highly annoying appionated people thinking they no best about ur situation...we have been tryin for 2 years and sometimes it does "get me" aND i have have the odd "crazy moment" haha who doesnt!

    i no none of you know me but i would be such a good mother, and i am a really nice person, dont do nothing wrong to no one and work hard same as hubby, it feels so cruel we cant have a baby, and ivf is our only shot...

    now peole are saying dont getmy hopes up that ivf wll work!!!!!!! gosh shall i just end it all now dont obsess about TTC, when i find out i cant naturally i have ivf "dont get ur hopes up lol"....oh whats the point haha x

    its easy for people with kids to say relax, you have children already, i have ZILCH. relaxing wont help me my oh sperm dont swim and kill each other lol image xx image
  • Booey, I know it probably won't help, but in defence of the people I was slagging off earlier (because I get it too!!). I do think that most people who have never been through this, have ABSOLUTELY no idea what to say! An older friend at work was talking about her daughter's problems and said she thought she might have upset her by saying "would it be that bad if you never had children, you get lots of nice holidays?" Errrm, YES!!!! I told her that there is nothing she can say to make her daughter feel better about her 4th miscarriage, and just to offer support.

    I suppose most people mean well, they just don't think about what they say before they say it.

    But of course you can get our hopes up about IVF! If we don't have anything to look forward to, as you say, whats the point?!
  • This pissed me off the absolute most when I was ttc (I am a graduate from this forum with unexplained infertility) Very hard to relax when you've forgotten the last time you've had sex for teh sheer hell of it!

    The month I got my bfp there was a marked change in my attitude that i'd never had before. I was literally so fed up I thought what the hell, It's out of my control so i'm sick of wasting anymore of my time worrying about this. I'd actually given up and was taking control of a bloody awful situation like sticking two fingers up to ttc. Then got my bfp! x
  • I am also a graduate of this forum and also with unexplained infertility, after two years and the dotor saying those dreaded words "you need to relax and it will happen" I could have chinned her. We gave up and that was also the month we got our bfp. I know it doesn't work for everyone and believe me I know how you must feel when people say it but sometimes it is true, stress can cause fertility issues xx good luck with your IVF hun and to all of you stuck in the hell of LTTTC xx
  • g/c, been trying for 9 months now ( ipost in kwa in ttc) and a lady at work said it to me this morning, relax and it will happen, i have been relaxed for the last 3 months and still zilch!!

    also mil faves saying is, 'your trying too hard' how is that even possible

    another friend said if we do it too much then it will dilute spermies, well we have tried every day, every other day every 3-4 days and still ZILCH!!!

    my mum is lovely though and she always says, it will be your turn soon, that is a nice thing to say i think, it makes me feel that my special bubs is just waiting for that special month to spring itself on me, lol, i look forward to it everyday!!!

    babydust to all xxxx
  • OMG I hated that too. If someone said it to me I used to go mad, and say I don't think relaxing will help cure my PCOS and hubbys low sperm count and motility!! And as I got pregnant when we were waiting for IVF, I now get 'see, you knew you were having IVF so you stopped thinking about it and thats why it happened'!! AGH!! I would guess it was more likely the metformin, weight loss, PCOS diet, gym 3 times a week, soy isoflavones, vitamin B6, hubby on wellman conception tablets, no hot baths, sex 3 days apart instead of every day to help his rubbish swimmers recouperate, laptop cushion, new baggy boxers......etc etc!!!

    Rant over!! Wishing you so much luck for your IVF X
  • magpie, lmao!! doing so much of that already, boxers, no baths, cushion, vits for both of us, more exercise, fc we get the outcome we want soon, its spring, time for babies, maybe mother nature will remember us!! xx
  • Trying too hard is the most ridiculous think ever!!!

    Or people who fall first month who say "do you think you're doing it at the right time" urm the ??60 on the cbfm, ??20 on frigging stick would say I know more than you and your magnetic ovaries!!x
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