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How are we all feeling?

Hi Ladies,

How are you all feeling? I'm a bit fed up wishing the time away until DH's SA re-test just want some answers and to be able to move forward with TTC. The days just seem to be dragging, I'm now convinced that there must be an issue with hubby so TTC seems a bit pointless until we get the results but still trying in vain.

My 30th is in the next two weeks, I know it's not too old for our first but when you reach a milestone in your life it makes me think about not having a baby even more. We started TTC when I was 28 so never thought we wouldn't have a BFP by now.

Sorry for the self indulgent post just wanted to get it off my chest, fed up of feeling like this. Anyone else counting down to appointments or test results? xx


  • Same. I'm 30, started trying at 28. Am currently waiting for next af before restarting clomid after ov drilling. Could get a bfp, but, seems unlikely. I know I should be positive but it's tough isn't it.
  • Hello ladies i understand how you both feel but don't give up hope! Im 37 and kept thinking thats too old for my first but do you know Ive decided to stop thinking like that as I know lots of older parents so keep positive you've got loads of time! Also I dreaded being 30 but i've been more happy in my 30s than I was in my 20's ( despite this ttc journey) so enjoy it xxxxx Sending you big positive hugs xxxxx
  • Hi Pumpkin-81 yes it is tough going I really hope the clomid and ov drilling work for you.

    poppy70 thanks for the reassuring words. I'm dreading turning 30 I don't even know where my 20s have gone and so the desperation for a BFP is now getting even greater with my birthday looming.

    I just wish my DH's Sa re-test would hurry up, it's been 8 weeks since the first one so 4 weeks to go. The days just seem to drag, the only thing they said about his first SA was that there wasn't enough so I'm not even sure what that means. I just want some answers now all the second guessing is driving me up the wall! x
  • Loopy, been wondering where you've been hiding!! Turning 30 is not all bad, just make sure you have lots of nice things planned! I guess going to New York helped soften the blow for me!! My bestfriend and I had been planning it for years, so I was actually looking forward to turning 30 :lol: I'll be 32 in March and as Poppy70 said I've enjoyed my 30's so far apart from ttc!

    We're back in the waiting game too, for our referral to see an Andrologist to get hubs checked out further, or if there's nothing they can do, then find out where we stand in terms of treatment, but I'm guessing that will be some time off yet!! Hope the next 4 weeks past quickly for you!!

    I've been trying to convince myself to find some PMA from somewhere, got hubs on as many vitamins as I can find, so the poor bugger rattles when he walks :lol:

    I also, whilst looking for positive thinking techniques, came across a blog of a ttc psychics, so for for a bit of fun had a Conception Reading done, here's what she said:

    Conception Reading: October 24, 2011

    I hope this reading finds you happy and healthy. I also appreciate your patience.

    3 Card Spread of Parents

    The 3 cards chosen for your reading are: Harmony, Stand Your Ground, and Discontent and Boredom. There are a few messages from the cards I can give you. I sense there have been small hiccups in your relationship that have caused some ups and downs. I feel overall you and your husband have a deep spiritual union, a strong partnership. I feel lately your relationship has grown. I also feel your journey ttc has had moments when you feel tested and challenged. Realize you do have the courage and strength to stand your ground. Don't surrender or give up the control. Maintain your health and get plenty of sleep. This supply of energy will allow you to endure anything. I sense this feeling of stagnation, discontent and restlessness because conceiving is not happening. Don't let it drain you emotionally and energetically.

    As far as fertility, I feel your cycles are regular and you do ovulate. I understand your husband's problem, but also feel as though your cycle could be a little longer. I am sure you use OPK kits, but look at past cycles and see if the time between ovulation and period is long enough, I think they suggest 12 to 14 days.

    I see the month of December 2011 as the month to conceive or find out. I see a boy. I do feel you will conceive naturally. I see you will get an early BFP around 9 or 10 days past ovulation. I sense you will have nausea, fatigue and some food aversions. I feel you need to eat more green. I also feel you will need a lot of rest. So I am feeling you may need to work a little less. I feel you will have a healthy pregnancy, just feel blah. I feel you will go into labor around your due date. I feel labor will be hard on you and you will need a c-section due to stalled labor. You will have a healthy baby boy.

    Angel Message

    The angels reassure you that the changes you're experiencing are bringing you blessings. Let the old go and welcome the new. Trust that your life is getting better, because it is. Your new positive outlook with respect to your home and work life is changing everything for the better.

    Favorite Number

    31 - The ascended masters ask you to look past all earthly illusions and see the Divine perfection within you, other people, and your current situation. As you see Divine perfection in your mind, it manifests externally in your relationships, career, health, and other life areas.

    Good Luck!!


    Like I said it was a bit of fun, but she picked up on my short cycles/LP which I hadn't told her about, so i'm hoping there's some hope in it, even if it's just the natural BFP part! Given me a boost for now and roll on Dec :lol:image
  • Ohh Vickster_77 I enjoyed reading your conception reading, where did you get it from? Was it expensive? I wouldn't mind doing one myself for a laugh. I'll keep my FC that December is your month hun would be a lovely Christmas surprise!

    I think I'm dreading hitting 30 as it seems as if I'm reaching another big milestone in my life without a BFP if you know what I mean. I'm sure my hubby has something nice planned for the day I've just come back from a week in Gran Canaria with all my family that was technically for my 30th. I had a fab time but definitely need to keep busy on the day to try not and dwell on my lack of TTC success.

    FC we get there soon hun, just hoping the next 4 weeks will fly I get so annoyed not being able to do anything about the situation.

    I'm back in work tomorrow after a week off - oh the joy! x
  • Good luck with your 1st day back at work Loopy, its the worse feeling in the world going back to work after your hols, glad you had a nice time away thou!

    This was the site I used for my reading, its $10, so think it equates to about ??6.50: WWW.HEALINGMESSAGESFROMSPIRIT.COM

    Let us know what she comes back with with if you give it a go!

    I know what you mean about milestones, although I seem to have set little ones all along the way and they've been difficult to cope with: last Xmas, Hubs birthday, my birthday, 1st wedding anniversary so I've given up on them now, well sort of, I've still got this Xmas down as one, but not building my hopes up as much this year!!
  • Hi Vickster_77 thanks for the info, I'll have a look at it and let you know if I get it done image

    First day back isn't half as bad as I was expecting it to be - thank goodness! I'm a little bit glad to be back as being off or in the house I have too much time on my hands to think about TTC if you know what I mean.

    Yes I've set myself little milestones all the way too but my 30th seems like 'the big one' if that makes sense.

    Hope you are having a good day x
  • Hi loopy,

    Sorry to hear you are finding things difficult. When is OH retest? Its this month isn't it? I can understand your birthday being a big milestone. It's one of those times that is always "in the future" and "in the future" you will have a baby.

    We are just waiting for the results of my OH SA. We were expecting a call today but nothing so hoping he will ring tomorrow but I think he is nervous and embarrassed so he wont' talk about it. I am fully expecting him to be called for a retest... he missed the pot!

    Where do you live? SA seem to work differently in different place. We were told just bring the sample in anytime.

    Have you done reflexology or anything? I have just started and find it relaxes me and gives me someone to talk to who is unbiased and listens without putting in her 2 cents that I hate hearing i.e relax and it will happen! Since doing it I have ov 2 days earlier on CD16 rather than CD18.

    I hope you are feeling more positive. x
  • Ahh thanks for the message chickensoup85. DH's SA re-test is 3 weeks today on 29th November, It can't come around quick enough to be honest. I'm sure that there is a problem so it seems as if we're dtd without a hope of a BFP. I just want the results so that we can move forward and hopefully get the help we need.

    Good luck with your hubbys results tomorrow I hope you have good news and they all come back ok. With my hubby's 1st one there wasn't enough sample to test so I'm wondering if he has a issue with volume.

    We live in Wales and were told that you had to get the sample to the hospital within a certain amount of time otherwise it wouldn't be any good to test. Where do you live? It's so annoying how waiting and treatment times vary so much depending on where you live.

    I've tried reflexology it helped to relax me a bit but I don't think she could find any issues to work on with me. AF is regular, I seem to ov every month so I wasn't sure if it was much benefit so only went twice. Are you having reflexology?

    My birthday is on Sunday so not looking forward to it, I started a uni course in sept so it's helping me to take my mind off TTC a little bit as I've got so much work to do. Can't wait to be able to go back to the doctor the beginning of December and actually speak to someone about all our results we haven't spoke to anyone we were just told by the receptionist that mine were all ok and DH had to have a SA re-test so as you can imagine I've got so many questions!

    Good luck on your TTC journey hun, hope you get your BFP soon. Did you CD21 bloods come back as ok? How long have you been TTC? Please let me know how your hubby gets on I'll keep my FC for you x
  • Maybe your DH missed the pot too? To be honest I wonder the same about my OH. I have seen people talk about the "loo dash" before it all dribbles out (excuse my crudeness!) but I have to say, I don't really have that.

    It should be the same everywhere. I live in Berkshire and we literally didn't need an appointment, just turned up with the sample at our convenience (fresh sample, within the hour).

    We are on our 13th month now. I haven't had any tests yet as were are waiting for the SA results. In the meantime I am doing reflexology and have just started taking agnus cactus as the reflexologist thinks I may have low progesterone due to spotting before and after af.

    Great idea having the course to take your mind off it. I hope you have a great birthday and ttc can be pushed to the back of your mind.

    Thank you for your kind message. I will update you on the results. Some to you, I have my fingers crossed for you. Don't give up; there are so many success stories.
  • Thanks hun you made me smile image x
  • The results are in.... Inconclusive. He has to go for a retest. I kind of expected it when he said there wasn't much in the pot. Doc confirmed the sample wasn't big enough.

    I'm quite annoyed that we had to wait 2 weeks for them to tell us that when they would have known straight away! And we had to ring them! So another 2 weeks wasted and now all the extra time we have to wait again.

    I am worried there will never be enough because he doesn't produce enough. I haven't said that to him though. image
  • (((big hugs))) Chicken_Soupuk hope you are ok. I think we are in the same boat as you and you hubby.

    They told us that with the 1st sample there wasn't enough to test and my hubby didn't miss the pot! We're waiting for the next SA now, they have made us wait 12 weeks I think its because that's how long it takes men to make new sperm. Just over 2 more weeks left to wait for us, I'll be glad to go back to the doctor's tbh.

    I think its worse with being inconclusive as you don't even know if you are facing a fertility problem - we're the same I keep wondering what the problem could be but I suspect its down to volume. I've been looking up issues with volume and it seems to be quite positive int he sense that there is usually sperm there to deal with so there are other fertility options to try before IVF.

    Hope this helps x
  • I wonder if it would be better for us to wait 12 weeks then. I'm not convinced he did miss the pot, he didn't seem certain. It is horrible playing the waiting. I can't imagine how much 12 weeks must be dragging!

    Thank you for your reply. Obviously I wouldn't wish it on anyone, and I really hope you get your BFP soon but it is nice to have someone to talk to who is in the same boat.
  • Hi chickensoup85 do you know when your hubby's 2nd SA will be? I know what you mean, I've looked on here but I can't find many people who have had a male fertility issue with volume it would be nice to be able to speak to someone who has been in the same position.

    Two weeks tomorrow until our next SA, 12 weeks have seemed so long the waiting is really starting to get to me now. How is your hubby feeling? Mine doesn't say much but we had a little row the other day and he just blurted out that he feels that he is less of a man and has let me down. I've tried to reassure him, I just wish he would talk to me about it but he just seems to bury his head in the sand.

    Hope you get your BFP soon x
  • HEy Loopy & chickensoup, I'm still lurking and still sympathising with you both x x x

    My hubs first test was measured at 2mls, so less than half a teaspoon (5ml) which is the average volume in the guidelines, his second test was much better at 6.5ml. I think the first test was very much down to nerves about having 'to perform' and he was much more relaxed about it second time round!

    The waiting is horrible though and no matter how bad it is for us, its def worse for them but they're far better at hiding it than us.

    Loopy, my hubs was def keeping it bottled up and an argument brought it out of him too and think he felt better for it, although he still carried on for a while with his head in the sand! Its only when his best friend told him his wife was pregnant by accident, that it really hit home and he did have a bit of a meltdown about things. It did him good in a way as it spurred him on to go get a refferal to a fertility clinic and now we're waiting for our appt next week.

    He is very much more open about things now that he's kind of come to terms with it, I think his main worry was that I'd leave him, I've no idea why he would think that, but now I've reassured him on several occasions that it's not the case - I want his baby, not just any baby - he's doing OK!

    I'm just getting nervous as to what they'll say at the clinic next week, I'm remaining hopeful there's something they can fix to make things better for us to get a natural BFP, but from doing too much 'googling' I think I'm probably being very naive!!!

    I'll keep remaining hopeful for us all for now x x x
  • Hi Vickster_77 great news that you've got a referral so quick how long did it take?

    DH's 2nd SA is in 2 weeks can't wait to be able to go back to the doctor to see where we stand. They didn't even test my hubby's SA as they said there wasn't enough to test.

    One minute I can't wait to be referred to a fertility clinic so that we can move forward to our BFP. Then another part of me thinks OMG what if there is nothing they can do and another part of me is a little but sad that we haven't been able to get pregnant naturally.

    I really hope all goes well for you, let us know how you get on it's nice to hear from someone who is going through the same thing x
  • Its a horrible situation Loopy and I'm afraid to say it doesn't get any easier, don't get me wrong I'm glad we've been referred, but then also terrified they might say IVF is our only option.

    I know there's many ladies that go through treatment each week, just never in a million years thought we might have to!

    As for our referral it took two weeks for the appt to come through (we're being seen at the Liverpool Women's Hospital) and two weeks to wait for our appt, so not long at all in the grand scheme of things!

    Will let you know how we go and hope you get better news on after your hubs repeat sample, or even better a BFP x x x
  • Hi Vickster,

    Good luck with your appointment, I hope it has a positive outcome.

    Loopy, my husband will not talk about it at all. I am not allowed to ask questions or mention it at all so I don't really know what the next step is but from the limited info I have had, it seems that he has just got to pick up the pot from GP then take the sample in asap. No idea if he has done it or not. I am waiting for an argument or mini melt down to find out how he is feeling.

    We were the same, too little to test so they didn't bother. What really irritated me was they would have known this within an hour of him taking the sample, yet made us wait 2 weeks to find out and then that was only because OH rang them!

    Its a pooey situation image
  • Hi chickensoup85 they did the same to us! Didn't bother testing and my hubby had to ring up for days to try and find out the results as they said they didn't have them! Then he rang the hospital and they told him that the had send the results or lack of results to our doctors the same day that he did his SA.

    chickensoup85 it seems as if all our hubbys are having mini-meltdowns and/or burying their heads in the sand - I think it has a lot to do with male pride. I hope you find out soon whether or not he has done the 2nd test, I'll keep my FC for you.

    I just had a cry to hubby, feeling low today just can't see an end in sight just wish we could all have a little luck on the baby making front x
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