Forum home Getting pregnant Long term TTC & infertility
🚨 Advance warning 🚨 This forum will be closing on 1st May – please see our pinned thread for more information.
Options

need to let off steam, sorry!

Sorry for a Sunday grumble, nothing that everyone on here hasn't gone through I know. But I need a bit of a splurge....
So many of my good friends are pregnant. I've promised myself never to let it show that it's a bit upsetting to hear each time ... after all, it's not all about me, it's their wonderful news and I never want people to think I'm anything but ecstatic that they're expecting. But lately there has been such a run of 'good news announcements' and I'm exhausted with it. I know it's not a race, and I know it won't make a difference to me getting pregnant however many of my friends get pregnant. But so many are unexpected, or honeymoon babies, or second / third babies, or 'they only tried for one month' babies. And every time, I have to act really excited for them and then go off for a bit on my own, have a cry and then feel guilty because I'm being selfish. It happened again today, a really good friend hasn't phoned for a while and I just knew what it would be. So I picked up the phone, we had a long chat and, right at the end, she said she's pregnant again. Of course I'm happy. But now I'm on my own and I'm feeling so sad about the whole thing. I don't know how many more months I can do this and I'm dreading having to do IVF and I wish we could have done it as easily as my friends. I was always the one that was 'bound' to have children. Now even the people I know who were really ambivalent about kids have got there, and we haven't.
Nothing else really to say, just feeling a bit sorry for myself. Everyone on here is so positive and I wish I could get some of that PMA.
Right - time for a nice hot bubble bath, a bar of chocolate and a glass of wine .......

Replies

  • Options
    LillyR, I hope the mini pamper session is helping. You're not selfish to be a bit sad as well as happy for them. I'm the same and I'm sure lots of us are. It makes me think why me, when others are having their second, or people who weren't going to, now are, and very easily!
    Sending you a big hug and a bucketload of PMA!
    xxx
  • Options
    Ah Lily Im sure like you said most of us have felt like this at some point and im sure there will be plenty more after us. As warren says it is not selfish to feel like this at all, it is completely natural to feel this way and wonder when it is your turn, it feels so unfair that we have to struggle like this and others just sneeze and get pregnant, but we will be so much stronger for it and appriciate our babies so much more.
    Hope you are enjoying the wine and chocolates and sending you BIG ((((((((HUGS))))))))
  • Options
    Ah Lily Im sure like you said most of us have felt like this at some point and im sure there will be plenty more after us. As warren says it is not selfish to feel like this at all, it is completely natural to feel this way and wonder when it is your turn, it feels so unfair that we have to struggle like this and others just sneeze and get pregnant, but we will be so much stronger for it and appriciate our babies so much more.
    Hope you are enjoying the wine and chocolates and sending you BIG ((((((((HUGS))))))))
  • Options
    Hi Lily, just wanted to say not to lose hope as it will happen to you one day and as loobylou81 says it will make you appreciate your baby so much more when the time happens for you. I felt exactly the same as you and knew my little bundle of joy must be up there waiting to come down and greet us, and eventually she did. After months of fertility treatment my husband and I now have a little girl, the same will happen for you I????m sure...don????t lose hope and know that your time will come. Enjoy the bubble bath, choccy and wine!
  • Options
    Thank you!!!!
    Feeling much better today. I think the hugs and nice comments helped even more than the wine! xx
  • Options
    aw chicken I know how you feel totally yet again this weekend another friend announced a preg after....wait for it... 3 months of trying I;ve just spent the past few hours with my friend and her one year old and her 4 month bump, I started to try when she was only a few months pg with her first ffs.

    Totally unselfish and just normal feelings there is nothing you want more and it seems so unfair, hope you are feeling better, I went through a phase last month where all I did was cry for about a week it was awful, think we all have our ups and downs, heres to a few ups for you xx
  • Options
    Thanks moonbean. Yes, definitely feeling a lot more positive. You're right, it's a lot of ups and downs for all of us, this whole process. Here's to lots of ups for you too! xx
Sign In or Register to comment.