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IVF - time off work

Hi ladies
I'm feeling more and more each day that IVF is going to be the path for us. And given that the NHS IVF waiting list we're on is well over 3 years long, we're going to look to try and fund it oursleves. Beans and toast for us!!

So, I'm wondering, can anyone advise me how I would be able to work IVF appointments around my job? Don't get me wrong, I am happy to do whatever it takes, (I even changed career completely 2 years ago to try and see if that helped with TTC...) but I guess I need to work out how many days I would need to be able to book off as annual leave and how many days I'd ideally need for any appointments and after Egg Collection and then post Egg Transfer?

Sorry this is such a detailed question and maybe only one those who've goner thru IVF/ICSI can answer, but any pointers would be so so appreciated. Also, would I need to let my employer know I was going for IVF - I'd prefer not to really although I appreciate it might be easier in some ways. I'd be really interested to hear what you think/experiences.

Sorry it's a long post and thanks in advance for any advice.
xx

Replies

  • Sorry but didn't want to read and run xxx If I was you I would check with the provate clinics first and see what their operating times are? It could be that you may not have to take off work if they do a late night or weekend appointment facility?

    Re letting the employer know, i'm not sure if legally you are obliged my gut says no. Do you work for a large firm, personally if it was me I would be inclined to may be take a few weeks off on the sick if poss - personal stress perhaps? I'm sure due to confidentiality your dr would may be be able to help facilitate this? Again not too sure but you can ask!
  • thanks for replying Moonbean! I'm afraid the private clinic nearest us is too far away, if that makes sense. So we'd be looking at going to an NHS clinic but self funding the treatment. It is slightly cheaper than doing it 'private' per se. Sorry, I didn't explain that bit very well in my initial post!

    You're right though, if it was a 100% private clinic, we would have been able to look at evening/weekend appointemnts.

    Re my employer - I think you're right, I too have a feeling that I wouldn't be 'legally' obliged to tel them - and yes it is a large company so i thinki would if need be, be justified in taking time off sick. I hate to 'lie' about it but I guess if it comes to that, I may very well be 'sick' and I'm sure plenty of people take time off for much less worthwhile reasons. Good advice re ask my doc - i am going to do that i think. Thanks again, I hope you're doing ok. I don't post all that often but I do follow all the chat! xx
  • You always post to me!!! Where abouts in Ni did you live? Re feeling guilty ot depends on what your classification of sick as and many people wronly misinterpret this as puking and not being able to get out of bed. The emotional journey of ttc never mind IVF is a fully justified reason for going out on sick at the end of the day you want stress levels at the lowest and if this requires sick leave so be it. I am not big for ringing in sick myself (Ihaven't had a day off in years) however when it is something as life changing as this there is no question, a h=jobs a job this is potentially your child so go for it!!! Look up some emotional stress disorders on the net and get familiarised!!!! LOL xx
  • ha moonbean you talk good sense there i think - and made me smile! you're so right, 'sick' isn't just puking etc and I totally agree when it is this importnat it doesn't really compare to work does it.

    Re NI I used to live in Co Down - a country gal! xx
  • Hey Ladies

    Mrs Bambino.. I managed to work the whole way through excepting.
    Took two day off for my egg collection as it was a Thursday and half a day for the embryo transfer
    We self funded although we qualify for NHS help we are part of the postcode lottery!!

    From memory we went to one information evening around 7pm. One appointment to sign consents - OH needed for this one

    Then called on CD1: appointment about 3 days later with the nurse took about half an hour to explain the nasal spray etc this was in the afternoon

    Then I think it should have been one baseline scan and one to confirm plus a blood test.

    BUT I suffered from hyperstimulation so I had to go every day for nearly three weeks. This is not always the case.Despite the situation they always saw me between eight and nine am for bloods and scans. The early time was really convenient for me and also to ensure they get the test results on the same day and can adjust your treatment accordingly.

    The clinic is half an hour away from where I work so even though I went so frequently I still managed to work without too much difficulty.

    This is not the norm and a couple of scans prior to ECwould be.

    Its difficult to work out how long you are on the stimulation injections they give you provisional dates but mine varied as I think many peoples do.

    It depends on how flexible your employers are. My husband had to say as he has tonnes of meetings as our EC date kept changing and we didn't have it confirmed until the day before.

    Talk to your clinic they should be able to give you some pointers also others on the forum will have had a totally different experience

    Honestly if we need to do it all again I would even despite the side effects. We have never had a BFP and IVF gave us that. The money angle is the only frightening thing.

    Am just writing to try and appeal against our GP - they can help you fund the cost of the hormones 700 pounds in our case. However ours did not , will let you know how I get on with this crusade.

    XX

    [Modified by: J-Jenko on February 24, 2009 04:41 PM]

  • PS should have said our treatment was self funded in an NHS clinic
    Happy to answer any further questions at all
  • J-Jenko, I can't tell you how much I appreciate you taking the time to explain all that. It's a great help - especially seing as yours was self funded NHS - I'll be doing the same if we decide to go ahead and try to find the money...

    That is a good idea re the blods/scans between 8am and 9am, I could ask about that too. And it's encouraging to know that it IS possible to do it and still work - especially seeing as if self funding salary will be pretty essential.

    Could I ask you to explain the bit about " one baseline scan and one to confirm plus a blood test." please? Excuse my ignorance, but what is a baseline scan? Is that the scan before EC to see how everything's looking? I have still a lot to learn about IVF. I wish there was a website or something that literally gave you a day by day breakdown of treatment etc as it all seems quite confusing...

    Thanks again. I hope you are doing ok - I have been following your 'story' and was thinking about you a lot when you were going through so much recently. xx

    [Modified by: MrsBambino on February 24, 2009 05:08 PM]

  • http://www.guysandstthomas.nhs.uk/services/managednetworks/womensservices/acu/whatis.aspx
    General info that we were given

    This second link has a schematic with the time ranges for the various stages, if go down the page IVF/ICSI is under the IUI timeline

    http://www.ivfdirect.com/treatments/treatments.aspx

    The first scan is as you say to confirm adequate down regulation by the nasal spray and to make sure there aren't any cysts and the ovaries look generally quiet. They call this a baseline scan. If this is ok then you can start the stimulating (FSH injections)

    Second scan is during the stimulation phase day 7/8 to count how many and size of follicles and possibly a blood test to measure the amount of oestrogen produced by the follicles

    I had an extra blood test at day five because of having PCOS to check that I had not over responded to the drugs - which I did

    It is the stimulation phase that is the one that may vary in length and might require extra visits

    People who respond unexpectedly to the stimulating injections are either young, v thin or have PCOS. Sadly on the third applies to me

    I am ok a bit tearful but trying to be positive and think this is the furthest we have ever been. Had small op on Friday and will be back to work tomorrow now bleeding settled down. It is easier now as the morning sickness is going - hard to have non viable baby but be constantly reminded. You just keep hoping for a miracle.
    Going to try and get very fit in preparation for the frozen embryo

    Take care and good luck
  • Thanks for all that and for the links - I'm going to take a really good look at them. And thank you for explaining things, again really helpful.

    I hope you feel stronger soon, both physically and emotionally. I think TTC is one of the few things in life that time doesn't heal, if you know what I mean. It is just as you say, learning to stay hopeful and live with the whole process. You are an inspiration J-jenko. Thank you again, xx
  • Jjenko you are an inspiration to all and a fountain of knowledge I know youa re already a scientist but ever considered movign to fertility treatment. Let us know when you get your next date for number 8 and hope you are feeling better soon xxxx
  • Hey moon bean and Mrs Bambino
    Awwwh shucks don't feel very inspirational. Its a place where you help if you have been through something. Its a pleasure really.
    I think my knowledge of hormones is sadly lacking. I think we will know more about number 8 when we have our appointment at the beginning of March. I have my questions written already

    My rough guess is wait two months to let ovaries subside and heal from surgery. Then the protocol is like Mrs Lizzie K had - at our clinic is roughly 5 weeks so around middle of May ... then the two week wait... ARGH
  • Hi MrsBambino,
    With regards to what to say to your work, if you wanted to keep working as much as possible could you tell them you need to have some gynae investigations which require several check ups/test etc first thing some mornings and leave it quite vague? The GP could write you any sick notes on top of that if needed, again stating gynae reasons. I don't think you would be obliged to devulge any more than that.
    Hope it all goes well for you!
    Lilou xx
  • Hi think you have to do what you feel is best. I am down regulating at the moment and still undecided of my route regarding work. I do not want to tell my boss but think I am going down the gynea route, think he will be so embarrassed be wont ask any further questions. I will just say I need to have several tests at certain times of the month and leave it at that. We have told no one about treatment apart form our parents so dont want work knowing.
    I was going to call in sick but jyst feel the stress of it might upset my system and I need to be as relaxed as poss.

    Hope this helps x
  • I think that some companys including mine actually have policies that you are allowed paid time off for IVF treatment so you shouldnt have to take annual leave. This probably doesnt apply to a lot of people but its worth finding out!
  • Hi Lilou, Wilmie and Jess,
    thanks so much for your replies ladies - really good of you.
    Lilou - I think the keeping it vague could be a good option. I'm pretty sure I could tell HR the truth and then perhaps give my actual manager a more condensed version, if that makes sense. If the time comes and we go down that route, I'll def be asking my doc how vague he can make a sick note!
    Wilmie - thanks for your insight too. I hope your down regging is going ok and you're not feeling too poorly. I think you're right, many bosses, especially male would be too embarrassed to pry! Good luck with the rest of your treatment - and do keep us posted, it's always so useful to hear other peoples' experiences.
    Jess - thanks for your reply. That's fab your company has that policy - that's how it should be I believe! I don't think we have such a policy but I will def check everything out.

    Thanks again ladies - all this is so encouraging. I will keep you all posted as to what we decide to do in the long run. xx
  • Hi Mrs Bambino,

    Like J-Jenko says, everyone has a different experience regarding appointments and scans etc and I get the impression different clinics vary quite a bit in the way they operate.

    For us... I called my nearest Private clinic (recommended by my GP) and made an appointment for which there was about 5 weeks waiting time.

    The initial consultion cost us approx ??140 (ish) and lasted about an hour or so. We alreday had lots of tests done so we had our GP fax all these over. The consultant recommended my husband have a chromosone test which they did there and then and I was also given an internal scan- they confirmed text book PCOS.

    The next time I attended was for a 'teach' where they show you how to inject what and when which took about 20mins.

    I then only had 2 further appointment before Egg Collection
    1 scan to confirm my system was 'switched-off' and another 8 days later to confirm I was more than ready for EC!

    My clinic only has scan & blood appointments at 7:30am so for the 2 appt mentioned above- they were early ones and i was at work for 8:30am.

    I had a week off following EC because I was so sore but I work for myself and was really probably being a little OTT so could have been ok with 2/3 days off esp if like JJ and it is just before a weekend.

    And then just half a day for Embryo Transfer it doesn't take long but we were delayed and waited 2 hours more than we should so we were lucky it was in the afternoon (if it had been the morning I would have taken the whole day off).

    I have had more appointments in the Frozen embryo medicated cycle than I had in the full ICSI cycle!!

    Hope this helps!

    xx
  • Thanks a million MrsLizzieK - that's a great help. I have emailed the clinic we would be using if we decide to self fund and asked them what is the earliest time they could do scan/bloods appointment as , as you say, to get those done first thing before work, would make it so much more doable.
    All these replies have made me feel like it is more possible than I thought it would be. I feel like I have put some aspects of my life a little bit 'on hold' while TTC and to be honest my work has been one of them, so I am now at the point where I want to do whatever it takes, but also still try to make sure I can live my life and try to hold down my job whilst this all progresses. Thanks again MrsLK - and I am following your other post adn hoping everything 'sticks' for you! xxx
  • Best of Luck MrsBambino!!
    It certainly is doable!! The area I find it has most affected me is my social life as me and Hubby tend to like a drink or 2(!) every other weekend (more if he had his way) and suddenly spending 3 months off the social scene has been a nightmare!!! For me of course - he has managed a few cheeky nights out whilst I sit in watching Jonathan Ross and moaning into my glass of water! I always say I wouldn't mind the 'life on hold' feeling if I could have a guarantee of a baby in the end of it!
    xx
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