Taking a break for a while.

Evie1979 · May 25, 2010 3:44PM

Hi there ladies.

Well as the title suggests I am taking a break for a while. Had the news today that this cycle of clomid with hsg injection has failed. My body just won't do what it is supposed to even with help!

So now our only option will be IVF. Which I have to say has really knocked me. I am gutted, I suppose I had always had this dream that maybe I would get my very own miracle.It all seems so final and i am absolutley terrified that it won't work and I will have to deal with the fact I will never be a mummy which I can't even bring myself to deal with.

So now I have an outpatients appt with the consultant on the 3rd June to discuss where we go from here. at the moment the fertility unit is under review from the PCT regarding treatments offered. The results are due in the next couple of weeks, so until then they can't put me on the waiting list,but the good(ish) news is that once on the waiting list the wait is 18 weeks at the moment. So we are going to give a NHS funded cycle a try and hopefully be successful, i've just got to try to be positive and shed a few pounds. We are both eligible for ivf but I would like to loose a bit of weight and lower my bmi ( may increase my chances?!)

So in along winded way I just wanted to let you know I am taking a step back from be for a while and take a break from actively trying and just try to enjoy my life for a bit, it's been a long and painful 4 years!! Just wanted to wish you all the very best of luck and having everything crossed that every one of you achieves your dreams of a fab BFP. You really all will be the most deserving group of mummies. Will be keeping my eye on you all!!

Take care,

lots of love evie xxx

Muffin_Mammy · May 21, 2010 1:33PM

So sorry to G/C, I just wanted to tell you that a good friend of mine has been through exactly the same, and was about to accept it would never happen and start looking at adoption. However, she is currently 34 weeks pregnant after her first cycle of IVF - so never give up hope Hon - you'll be a great Mummy one day.

Hxx

lillyr · May 21, 2010 1:39PM

Oh Evie, I'm so sorry to hear this hon. What bad news for you. BIG HUGS!!!!!
I think sometimes it's a good idea to have a little 'mental break' from it all. Especially after a setback. This is such a b****r sometimes isn't it. Stay positive for your IVF, if it comes to it. It's honestly not that bad. I really hope you get your well-deserved BFP. We're all here when / if you need us. xxxx

TBDtinybabydancer · May 21, 2010 1:46PM

So so sorry Evie, I really had hoped so much that this was your turn. It's just not fair. I think the idea of IVF is, as you say, very frightening and seems so final, but as Lilly says it really isn't as bad as it sounds. And it really does work for the majority of couples. I think a break sounds like it will do you the world of good right now though hon. Really hope you have some confirmation on when you can get started soon, just so you have something to work towards. Make sure you come back WHEN you get your good news sweetie. Big hugs to you xx

laujai · May 23, 2010 5:14PM

Evie

Im so sorry I have only just seen this, but have been asking after you in the other thread.

Im so sorry sweetheart. Like the others say a break sounds like a good idea hun and you never know what may happen whilst not actively trying!!

Lots of love and hugs to you huni

We'll all be here wen you come back xxxx

rocky_kiz · May 24, 2010 3:16AM

hey hun, like laujai i've only just seen this too! i really hope the break does u good hun, i can see why its needed after all you've been through, even with ivf it would still me your miracle its just that u needed that bit extra help! and a good plus is that ur eligible. i hope ur app goes well for you. big ((((((((((hugs))))))))))) xxx

Evie1979 · May 25, 2010 3:24PM

Thankyou ladies for all your lovely replies and support! I know I can always rely on you!! I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that this is what i'm going to have to do to achieve our dream.

I finally opened up to one of my closest friends at the weekend. We were at a wedding and there was inevitable baby talk and drinks had been flowing and she just kind of guessed something was up. I'm normally a happy girl and have learnt to hide all of this from everyone for 4 years, but when she asked what was up it all just came pouring out. She was so suprised and told me off for dealing with this all on my own for so long. She had fertility probs before her 2 gorgeous boys and her sister had successful IVF for the same prob as i have. So the short of it was i felt so much better!! The burden just seemed to be lifted a bit and I know I have someone to talk to now that really does understand how i feel, other than you lovely ladies!! So after quite a few tears and lots of hugs I slapped on my happy face and got out there and danced like a crazy girl for the rest of the night.

So now waiting for my appt next week to see what procedures we will be following and get on that waiting list!!

Thanks again for all your support girls, it means alot.

Take care,

love evie xx

MrsDAO · May 25, 2010 3:44PM

Hey Evie,
I've just seen this post. I'm so sorry things haven't gone well with your meds so far. It's not surprise that you feel the need for a break. ((((((((BIG HUG)))))))

I am so pleased that you found someone to talk to about all this. It's amazing how fertility problems remain so difficult to talk about and how we keep them to ourselves. I really hope you continue to get some ???????real life??????? support from her and that you take inspiration from her sister's success story.

Sending you all my love - you're always so great and supportive on here and I hope you have some great news about your next steps at your appointment next week.

xxxx

Taking a break for a while.

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