Forum home Getting pregnant Long term TTC & infertility

feel like it's my fault!

Hi girls,
finally got my appointment through to see fertillity specialist (thank god!) but OH got his SA results today that have come back normal! I am really happy about this, but now I have started to feel incredibly guilty, thinking that it is all my fault why we can't get pregnant!
OH says it's fine and is putting no pressure on me but I feel s**t!

I don't know if anyone else feels similar, but I keep looking into the past wondering what I have done to stop me getting pregnant. I ask God to help me (I'm a catholic) and nothing seems to happen! I am a nice person, I go out of my way to help people but still it's not happening!

I just hope that one day it will be our turn, and that if it isn't OH doesn't turn against me!



  • ah hun!
    Its really not your fault. Its mother nature being difficult. Your results may come back clear too and it may be unexplained fertility issues. I don't know your story so i am really sorry if i upset or offend you.
    I'm sure your husband will not turn against you hun. he will be your rock and be by your side until you get the baby you both so desperately want.
    Keep doing everything you are doing and you will get your dream

  • Hi WNAM

    I know what you mean about guilt. When we had our initial tests a year ago DH's SA came back great and i thought the fault must lie with me. I subsequently got pg but had a mmc. Another year on we have repeated some of the tests and had more and this time his SA has come back abnormal which was a bit of a shock. He will need to be retested in a couple of weeks but he was then really blaming himself!! Subsequently i have found out that i have at least one PCO so currently it is both of us with the problem which is better for sharing the guilt but not better for TTC obviously!!

    It has been an interesting lesson in how not to blame ourselves or each other for our problems, after all a lot of infertility is unexplained and nobody can be blamed for that!

    Good luck xx
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