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miscarriage

Hi, I found out on thurs that I have had a missed miscarriage.
I was 11 wks on Tue when I had some brown spotting, I spoke to MW who sent me to the H(just to ease my mind but she was sure it would be fine).

I had an internal scan which wasn't very nice, anyway after getting a second opinion the doctor told us they could see 2 sacs and nothing in either and that at 11wks they should be able to see something.

I have to go back on thur to double check but was told not to get my hopes up as they wer 100% sure nothing was there. They said if I hadn't miscarried by then they would give me a tablet to do it, anyway I started bleeding on fri which I'm pleased it's happened naturally.

I'm so devastated me and my hubby wer so excited, I'm heart broken.
I need to ask lots of questions on thurs, I think 2 sacs meant it would have been twins but I'm not sure. That makes it worse twins would of been lovely.

I keep hoping by some miracle that they'll find a baby on thurs and I'v maybe miscarried 1. (Stupid I know).

Has anyway experienced the same thing? I hope we'll be able to try again in a month or two.

Thanks look forward to hearing any advice
From Helen
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Replies

  • HI Helen
    Just wanted to say sorry to hear about your news. There are lots of threads on here about miscarriage and you will find loads of support there from the people who have been through it. I have a very early MC but didn't even know I was pregnant so I can't be of much help to you here as the emotions are so different I guess.
    Take care of yourself
    Tracey
  • hi helen, so sorry to hear your news.
    i also had mmc in april, went for 12 wks scan and 2 sacs altough one had never really developed the other had stopped at 10wks. we were also devastated. as i had no pain etc. i waited a week then went in for op, its been 3 months now and we are ttc again. i would recommend waiting until after 1st period just to give you and your body time to heal abit. i have been talking to girls on the missed miscarriage help forum and they have been great and 2 of them are preg already so it gives you hope. if you check that forum out it gives you lots of support and advice.
    i hope all goes well for you and make sure you ask all the questions you need to.
    it really does get easier although i think about it all the time.
    lots of love becsxxx
  • sorry to hear your news helen . i misscarried twins back in october. we lost the first one on the thursday and were pinning all our hopes that everything would be ok with the second but unfortunately i lost the second one on the following tuesday so i can really understand how you feel as i was 12 wks and was already showing it was heart breaking and i thought it was the end of babies for me as i was 40 in feb but nature has been kind and i am expecting again and i am due in sept so read all the posts on here it will give you some comfort i got through it all thinking that nature knows what she is doing and something must have been very wrong for it to have happened . good luck helen will be thinking of you on thursday
    fea x
  • So sorry Helen, I've never had a mc but had spotting and bleeding early in pregnancy so have experienced the panic you initially feel. Can't imagine what you are going through now but hope you are getting the support you need at home and from your GP etc. Fingers crossed that there may be a glimmer of hope on Thursday if one of the twins has survived. We are all here to support you and help you through this.

    hugs Liz xx
  • Hi to Tracey, Becs,Fea and Liz
    Thanks so much for you replies, it's good to hear positive thoughts.
    I will go and have a look on the missed miscarriage forum as soon as I'v done this.

    I wish you all lots of luck
    Fea congrats on your pregnancy, I do worry about getting pregnant again as it's something I'v wanted for a fw year now but hubby wasn't ready. I'm 28yrs old but we'v been together 10 yrs and just got married in march. We'll try again in a mth or 2 and hope for the best.
    Anyway all the best for sept when you have your lovely baby.

    Thanks again
    All the best From Helen x x x x

    [Modified by: HelenNic on July 15, 2007 05:22 PM]
  • hiya hun,
    just wanted to say am sorry about your news, i wish luck and hope you begin to feel better. take it easy, i hope and will keep my fingers crossed that you get some good news.

    visit this website if you want, it has lots of info and it is a beatuiful website as well. hope this helps
    www.freewebs.com/maeanswers.
    goodluck for thursday
    xxxdebsxxx
  • Hi Debs
    Thanks for your kind thoughts.
    I will have a look at that web site.
    Thanks From
    Helen x x
  • Hi, hope everyone is well.
    I had another scan today which still showed 2 empty sacks. I thought I had miscarried over the weekend as I had bleeding and clots, I was hoping they would tell me it had all gone so we could come home and try to move on.
    I had to have an internal scan and an ultra sound to confirm there was nothing there.
    I then had to decide whether to have a tablet which loosens everything and go back in 2 days for a pessery and wait for it all to pass or have the operation to remove it.
    I decide on the tablet, I hope I made the right decision I have to go back on Sat.
    All I wanted was for it to be over today I feel so tired and drained.
    I hope I sleep better tonight, tempted to get pissed but I think I would get too emotional.

    Take Care
    Love Helen x x x
  • Hi Helen

    Sorry to read about your news. My heart goes out to you as my OH and I experiences a mmc at the beginning of june. I initially decided on the natural methos but after waiting for a weekend decided the best for me was the op. Make sure you have plenty of pads and stay close to home...we'll be thinking of you.

    I know you may feel now that things are awful but please believe me when I say things do get better and you will feel better as time goes by. During the time after my mmc I was very low and having to see myself bleed was a constant reminder of what was going on.

    Read the posts on the mmc forum and they certainly helped me and will help you realise you are not alone.

    with lots of love

    Sian XX
  • Hi Sian
    Thanks for your reply.

    I wanted so much for it to be all over yesterday and to come home and just try to move on but I guess lifes not always that easy.

    I'm off work now for 6wks as I work in a school so hopefully that will give us time to get through it and move on.

    Thanks so much for your kind thoughts
    Take Care
    From Helen x x x x

  • hi Helen,
    i'm really sorry to hear your news. You use those 6 weks wisely, you get yourself pampered and relax and sleep, because you need it. I hope everything goes well for you both, i will keep my fingers crossed and my thoughts are with you.

    Take care and take it easy, Debs xxxx
  • Hi Helen

    Am also on school hols so we can chat on here and I can share my experiences with you. If I can give you any advice I would suggest that if you think something, share it with ppl on here. I was thinking horrible things a few weeks ago, how I was jealous of my friends ...especially the pregnant ones and things like that made it difficult to talk to friends, but on here you can say what you need as it is all part of the coming to terms with what has happened.

    Take each day as it comes. I used to give myself a score out of 10 for each day and kept a journal writing down all my thoughts and feelings, just to get them out of my head.

    All here to help u through.
    Love Sian XX
  • Hi Debs and Sian

    Thanks Debs I will try to relax having real trouble sleeping so feel very tired, hopefully once 2morrows out the way I can start to chill out. We R going to go away for a few days so that might help.

    Sian I understand what you mean we went shopping on wed to our nearest city which is an hour away ( I didn't want to see anyone I knew) and every pregnant woman I seen I kept thinking it's not fair!

    My best friend was also trying for a baby I hope she doesn't feel she can't tell me now as I will be pleased for her but it will be difficult at first.

    Look forward to our chats, 6wks always goes really quick though. My hubby would shout at me if I said that he says we get too many hols, he's just jealous!

    Take Care
    Love Helen:\)
  • Hi was in hosp yest morn to have my pessaries to bring things along, hoped I'd be home by T time but things never go as planned.
    I eneded up staying in hosp last night so they could monitor me but this morning still hadn't passed sacks, so going back tomorrow for D&C.
    They have let me come home now but if I bleed too much I have to go back, I'm hoping in the next few hrs it might still happen, I don't really want the op.

    Things R always such hard work it feels like this whole thing is never ending.
    My hubby has been brill he stayed in hosp with me all day even though it was boring and sometimes unpleasent he wouldn't leave me.
    I really scared about the op, how bad is it?
    I wish I'd had that done in the first place.

    Look forward to hearing from people
    Take Care
    Love Helen x x x
  • hi helen, please dont worry about the op, i had it and its very quick and quite painless, period like cramps afterwards but they give you painkillers for it. i also had very little bleeding.
    i had to wait a wk for mine and wish i had done it straight away.
    i will be thinking of you love becs xx
  • Hi Becs
    Thanks, I'm really scared but I wish I'd just done that instead of pessaries.
    It was a long day yesterday but hopefully this time tomorrow it'll be over.

    Hope your well
    Thanks
    Love Helen x x x
  • Sorry to read your post Helen. I had a mmc in April and had a D&C. I too found the mc absolutely soul destroying. But you will feel better in time.

    Like Becs said, the D&C is quick and painless. I came out of the anaesthetic thinking they hadn't done the procedure yet! Was in and out of hospital on the same day. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

    Take care, Jo x
  • Hey HelenNic

    Hope you doing ok. Have been thinking about you. I also had the ERPC which was not half as bad as expected. In one sense it helps as it speeds things along and you can start to rebuild your life. One the other hand it is a reminder of what was. Be kind to yourself over the next few days and just go with your emotions, if you feel like crying just do it. This really helped me as when I cried all my thoughts came out, no matter how silly they were. Or just come on here and rant, we all understand.

    Take it easy,
    love Sian XXX
  • hope all goes well and make the most of your little break you will need and deserve it.
    Take care and hope you feel better soon debs XXXX
  • Hi
    Thanks Sian and Debs for your support, it really helps coming on here and talking to people who know how I feel.

    Well went into hosp yesterday at 8 o clock and got a room on my own which was good.
    Was told I would be having op sometime in the morning, I thought great be home in the afternoon but the way my lucks gone over the last week I should have known that wouldn't happen.
    They kept getting emergencys so I got put back so it was 5 by the time I had it done and 9.40pm when we got home.
    It was a very long stressfull day and I was really scared about the op, but as everyone said it was fine I wish I had done that instead of the pessaries. It has dragged it out over three days and made it harder to deal with.
    I must say the hosp staff were absolutley brilliant they made us feel as comfortable as poss and even gave hubby his tea while I was away,

    Well thats it over with we can try and move on now.
    I'll wait for my first period then I think we'll try again. Is anyone else trying again, how do you feel?

    Thanks for your support Love Helen x x x

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