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waiting for AF...

Its been a month since my mmc and erpc. I knew it might take ages for AF to come and was ready for that but I have had period pains on and off for the past week and so I have been expecting it any day now. Now I just want it over and done with. I need to know my body is ok. Does this make sense??
I am also thinking this period is gunna be painful because of the pains I have been getting? Is that likley? (I don't normally get more than a dull ache in my lower back etc)
I feel like getting the AF out the way is the next step in my grieving process.
I am so sad still. Everyone apart from OH seems to have forgotten about our mmc now and I still can't get it out of my head.
I feel like if I get AF out of the way we can TTC and I might feel more 'normal' but then I will be a mad broody symptom spotter lol!

[Modified by: newbiemum on 26 May 2009 22:40:10 ]


  • Hi Newbiemum!
    I sooo know what your saying. I too had a mmc in late April at 16 weeks. Now that I'm back to work it feels like everyone has forgotten about it, though I still feel that it's a very raw wound.
    I too had been waiting for my AF for 5 weeks. I had similar pains in the weeks before and also just as frustrated. Thankfully lady flow came to visit early this week and its such a relief. It feels like my body is finally healing and I can get on with TTC...FINALLY!! I'm more positive now and cant wait to get pregnant....I feel that's when I'll feel 'normal' again.
    What I'm basically trying to say is that, your not alone in what your feeling and you should hang in there and give it abit more time. They do say you should get your AF within 4-6 weeks after the mc.
    All the best my dear!!
  • Hi,
    Waiting for your first AF seems to take forever.

    Luckily for me it was only a 30 day wait. But i did have period like pains the week before and a brownish cm (sorry if tmi). Was so relieved when Af finally arrived as like you say it means your body is getting back to normal and it's almost like you are ready to start a new chapter in your life.

    I was worried that my first AF would be really heavy and painful but to be honest it really hasn't been to bad at all. No more pain than usual and really only slightly heavier, but I guess we are all different and experience different things. I hope that when she does arrive she is kind to you too.

    The problem with other people is that we all lead such busy lives these days that unless something directly affects them in some way it is very easy for them to forget. If you feel people are shutting your feelings out try and talk to them by saying you are feeling sad on a particular day and I am sure they will rally round I really dont think they have forgotten on purpose.

    Remember you are not alone with this, and these feelings and worries are normal, she will arrive eventually, and then you can start planning to TTC again.


    Leigh-Anne x
  • hi
    Although I had ectopic and surgery I can appreciate how you are feeling waiting for AF (its seems strange having spent so many months hoping not to get AF that you keep hoping you will) Mine did turn up last week and it was the same as pre surgery but obviously different situ and it did make me feel that I was moving on and my body was getting back to normal - I hope you get yours soon
    I think after a while people find it difficult to know whether to talk about mc/ectopic - not that they don;t care but as it hasn;t affected them directly there lives are contiuing as normal.
  • Unfortunately i had to wait 7wks and 3days for my AF after my ERPC following a MMC. That was back in March and i felt exactly like you. I just wanted my body to get back to normal and prove to me it could do something right. I was so frustrated with myself. I was also worried that first AF would be horrendous but actually it was ok. It maybe lasted a couple of days longer than normal but otherwise it was fine although i do have quite heavy painful AF's anyway. It's not easy to be patient i know, but it will come and then you can get back on track!
    It's odd wishing your AF on yourself isn't it, when you used to spend so much time hoping she never shows?!
    Good luck
  • UPDATE! AF arrived at the end of last week!!!! Yay! has been light and seems to have gone now (I haven't bled for 24hrs). It only lasted about 3 days (normal for me is about 5) ??!! Arggghh! I am never happy! lol! But as I was told it might be heavier than usual and it was lighter, I am worried! I know I am going to be worried about everything now until I hold another baby in my arms but arrrrgghhh I wanted a horrible period to know everything is ok with my body!

    Should I use ovulation sticks this cycle to be sure my body is back to normal??
    Argh! Sorry for rant!
  • My cycles took a while to settle down back to my previous 'perfect 28 day cycle'. For a start after mmc I bled for weeks, then AF were 8 weeks apart - incredibly frustrating as we wanted to try again. Sometimes it is a lighter period we are all different. Use this time to make sure you are ready for a new pregancy- the first few weeks are going to be really tough but it does get easier (with short bouts of absolute panic). I personally would give it another cycle and then count from there.
    Lentil 15+2 after 3 mmc
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