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this has been a very weepy day

I am feeling so sad today,yesterday i was feeling quite good , Im sure i ov last weekend used opks & had pains & ewcm so when i woke up yesterday had a it pinkish cm got excited as i thought implantation maybe!? went a cycle with hubby & lunch felt great. Then woke thismorning with a little pink/red cm. Now ithink its my period. No im sure its ny period. I really wanted to fall pg straight away to take the pain of not being preg away,somehow having my period makes me not prenant anymore.....Today was supposed to be my scan so felt bad anyway then to top it off bloody hospital phoned me & asked why i had missed my app???? i couldnt even speak for crying.

I had app with doctor & all i did was sob, i honestly thought i was getting better but i am worse.

Thanks for listening to me
Annette xx


  • Hi Annette didn't want to r&r.

    Today was probably made worse by being your scan date. Your emotions will be up and down, but it will get better.

    I was disappointed I wasn't pg the first month after my mmc. But was able to get on with it, and we're trying again. xx
  • Hey Annette,

    I didnt want to read and run either & i agree with mithical that your scan day prob makes it worse but you will have up and down days.

    I should have been 14 weeks on Saturday (havnet been trying again) and as i mentioned the spotting well it now seems to def be a period so im going to be positive and look forward and try again after this now that i will be able to date it if i get pregnant straight away and i also know my womb has had a good 'clear out' I know that sounds awful but my baby is long gone and i still cry every night for my loss but physically i wanted to get back to normal to help the emotional side of things and i am hopeful that at least now i am espec as it fits it with my normal cycle - does yours?

    What im trying to say and sorry for waffling is try and look on it as a physical ending at least to what you have been through over the past few weeks and look forward as hard as it is....

    Other thing to mention is with my spotting last month i had pinkish spotting and assumed it was start of my period but after 4 days with no sign of a period and only really when i wiped i tested and got my BFP and spotted brown for another few days i was petrified and wonder now if it was a bad sign (at the time i thought good baby must hav ebeen nestled in snug which it was) as they put it down to an implantation bleed and also said its common to have a small 'break through' bleed if its round about the time of your af being due so although unliley there may still be a little hope if you have been BDing. This isnt to give you false hope its just me sharing my story.

    Sorry for rambling.

    Take Care,

  • Hi Annette,

    So sorry to hear you are feeling so low at the moment,I feel I can't just read and run but I really don't have anything useful or wisom to pass on but I just wanted you to know that my heart goes out to you and that I am sure that with the love and support from your family and all of us girls on here that over time things will get better for you. Hope that you feel a little better today.

    Leigh-Anne xx
  • Thankyou mithical & lauz
    What you both said makes sense,i will feel better with time,feel a little better today. Lauz the spotting ive had last few days is def my period too which in a way makes me feel good that my body is getting back to normal & we can start ttc this month too. Stocked up on cb digital ov kit yesterday so im more than ready!!
    Hope its our month !

    Annette xx
    oh as blood started yesterday but quite heavy during the night do i count yesterday as cd1??
  • Thankyou leigh-anne
    Today is now a new start!
    Annette xx
  • Annette,

    That's so true it is best just to take one day at a time and for me at the end of the day I try to find one positive thing that has happened during the day, and focus on that.

    I am finding it so hard though, but am perservering with it, and it does seem to help.

    I wish that I was at the stage you are at and not still in limbo. But I will get there with time.

    Take care.

    Leigh-Anne xx

  • If you dont mind me asking. When are you expecting af? or are you late?
    Annette x
  • Treat when the red blood started as CD1 hun. xx
  • Hi Annette

    Sorry you're feeling so low. I remember feeling really down when my scan date came around - it's only natural as it's a reminder and makes you think even more about what should have been. And the hospital ringing you up like that must have been awful for you.

    I hope that with each day that passes you start to feel a little better and can look to the future and concentrate on trying again.

    Sending (((((hugs)))))

    Love NN xxx

    p.s - I would count CD1 as the first day you had red blood flow

    Click Here To Read My Ramblings On Living With Loss
  • Hi
    so sorry to hear you are having a rough time, with it being your scan date must be very hard for you, I hope you get your BFP very soon but in the meantime hopefully your body is getting back to normal and you can get back to TTC
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