What do you do now..? Miscarriage at 14 weeks :-(

Hi ladies, Not really sure what I should be doing or saying, the pregnancy came as a huge surprise, we spent 5 years ttc our first. Since dd was born we didn't use contraception hoping it might just happen itself, 2 years on it hadn't so we gave up on the idea, booked our wedding for next year & decided we would then see a Dr for help after the wedding. At the end of October I randomly did a test, I have pcos & very irregular cycles, they can be 5/6 months apart so I hadn't thought to test earlier. I'd also had a little bleeding so assumed that was an attempt at AF. Anyway, they test was positive. I couldn't believe it, I'd had a little more bleeding so was sent to EPU for a scan, there it was.. A little 11 week old baby waving at us. All was fine, we were almost 12 weeks so we told everyone the good news, a week later i started bleeding very heavily & thought it was all over, we were scanned after attending A&E and baby was still fine, they couldn't see the bleed on the scan so said some of the edge must have come away & they sent me home to rest and said the bleeding should settle & stop in a few days, it hadn't stopped and so they booked a scan for the following Monday, when the weekend came I started bleeding even more heavily, passing large clots, I really thought this time was it but again went back to A&E and was scanned, still the baby was fine, moving around & they said as there was still a heartbeat there was a 95% chance the pregnancy would continue as normal, I was sent home to rest again, again the bleeding still hadn't stopped but had gone very light so they booked another scan for the Monday, this time the weekend came and I woke about 4am with a little tummy pain but i wasn't concerned as I'd had this the previous 2 weekends much worse & everything had been fine, my partner went to work at 5am as normal but I got up again about 6, I had a gush of what I thought was blood, but again I wasn't concerned because this had happened both previous weekends, I took some paracetamol and got back in bed but felt I needed the loo again soon after. I went and when I went to wipe, I could feel something, I looked and could see the baby's legs. Every time I close my eyes I can those little legs & tiny toes. I don't know what to say to anyone, half the time my mind is completely blank & I'll just start crying without even thinking of the little baby. Once my partner had come home, we called the ward I'd stayed on & In the end we called an ambulance because the baby had come out but hadn't come away from me, I feel so guilty that I couldn't bring myself to touch or pick the baby up, I was so devastated, frightened & upset, I was shaking & trying to calm my dd who had gotten upset then she saw me crying. I feel so terrible that I couldn't pick up my little baby, it was 14/15 weeks so although very small, it was fully formed. I'm hoping that with time it will get easier but I'm not sure I'll ever forgive myself for not picking the poor little thing up and barely being able to look at it, instead i let it fall in to the toilet & one of the ambulance men removed it to take to hospital with me. Not sure what to do next now, do I carry on as normal, when can you start trying again, when do I go back to work. My sick note from the bleeding covers me this week and next but I'm not sure if I need that long or if I might need longer. I'm worried some people with think its nothing and I should be back straight away. My partner has been amazing through it all, the mc happened on Saturday but I'm starting to think even he thinks I should be getting back to normal already. Life can be so cruel