Forum home Pregnancy Miscarriage & pregnancy loss

Losing my baby and do not know what to expect

Back in November my partner and I were ecstatic to find out we were expecting our second child together. Things were great for a while till we were scanned and told our pregnancy would not end happily but to go home and return for another scan one week later. The epau department said the sonogrpher ahoukd not have told me tht under any circumstances We returned and was told growth had picked up and baby had a flickering heart beat We left feeling happy and confident until a week later I started spotting . after our scan we were again told this pregnancy wouldn't end well. The waiting has bee a Nightmare and were praying for a miracle .last night I started bleeding heavily and cramping severely. I know iv started to miscarry but do not know what to expect , when we can try again and why my local hospital have treated us quite poorly. It really hasn't helped. They were as bad when I lostmy son  at 21 weeks. I really don't want a d and c. Just don't know how long a miscarriage will take ,if this pain is normal and whether to still attend my scan this Wednesday 


  • Hi. How's it going.  I had in miscarriage in August and was 5 weeks. Caught on straight away after and lost the baby at 12 weeks. I had to go into hospital to pass the baby. As I had no bleeding or pains. I was just going for a routine scan and found out then. 

  • Hi sorry to hear of your losses. I had a 21 week loss in 2009 and also found out at a scan so can understand how you feel and the horrible words that baby has passed. I began to hemorrhage 2 nights ago and was rushed to hospital by ambulance. Iv lost my baby unfortunately. I had to have a procedure done to unblock the opening of my womb as the pregnancy could not pass through causing the excessive bleeding. I feel numb I havnt really cried. Iv got to take a pregnancy test on the 25th and if it still radsositive their going to do a d and c xx

  • Thanks for your reply. And I can't imagine how bad it was at 21 weeks. And am so sorry to here about this pregnancy too. How far on was you this time? When I went to hospital it took 13 hours to pass it all. It was one of the most traumatising things I've done. The baby did pass on its own but the placenta wouldn't come out so the doctor had to pull it all out is was horrific x hopefully you won't need to go to hospital for the d and c and nature will of took its course x 

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  • Wow, I totally relate to your post! I had a horrible experience w/the doctors here. They figured out I was having a miscarriage after my 1st visit, & when I went back for another visit (unknowing, w/my husband) they told me the *miscarriage* was going well & asked if I had any questions...then they were like, "Oh, you didn't know?" After looking into things, they realized they must have forgotten to call me when they got my first visit's results back. We were so devastated to be treated that way. They then proceeded not to tell us many details on what to expect & they didn't actually offer a D&C or medication, either. They acted like just b/c I am a woman that I will "just know" & acted like I was taking up their time. Definitely won't be going there every again.

    I had no previous MC or successful pregnancy before or after that 1. It's hard to tell you what to expect as everyone is different. I MC'd around 8-10wk, & the experience wasn't too bad. Sort of like a bad period? The sac I passed was about the size of a small strawberry & did NOT hurt. I did not have strong contractions, back pain or nausea like some people report having. I took a half dose of Tylenol & just took it easy for a few days. It was harder emotionally definitely.

  • Also, I don't normally have heavy periods, so that could play a factor in why I wasn't bleeding a lot or cramping a lot. It took about 5 days total, very fast. I worry about my general fertility since I don't normally have a lot of menstrual tissues/lining. I think this contributed to my MC. I also didn't know I was pregnant for most of the time & have been around cigarette smoke, loud music & had drank a little bit during the time. I know most MC's are caused by anything the mother did, but I'm in medical school & these things make sense as causes for me.

    Like I said, the emotional part was the hardest. We buried the tiny remains somewhere where we can visit when we want. This was very good for me in getting better. :) Good luck.

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