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Tears on my face

Hello, I am here to get some advice and help if you let me. I am married and have amazing husband. Our love story started a great while ago. We were incredibly happy till the crisis moment in our life. Unfortunately, we had a car accident that changed everything. In the aftermath of it I had severe kidney injury and it was removed… Nevertheless, I got accustomed to a new life and started to think that everything was okay and almost nothing had changed. Yeah, my life was full of love, happiness and laughter again. Over time we decided to become parents. I was sure that we would be perfect parents. Even no doubts. My doctor assured us that we had chances to conceive and baby was going to be fine. Partially he was right. A little bit later I got pregnant. I cannot even explain what I’ve felt. But those emotions lasted not so long as it was desired… I had miscarriage at 6 weeks. My poor baby didn’t even manage to draw the first breath in our world. To say that I felt horrible and my soul was torn asunder equals nothing. That was so awful. Perhaps the most difficult thing in the world to experience is desiderium. Unbelievably hard… I am sure that it was the time when my husband and I experienced the bitterest and the most depressive feelings ever. Right after our, let me say, recovery, we met with our doctor who only added fuel to the fire. It has emerged that I am hardly able to carry a baby by myself. Great news as usual… Anyway, our desire to become parents is unstoppable. So we started thinking about other variants. Nowadays, there are a lot of various reproductive clinics, so maybe someone can advise us what to do. And there is one more thing, I am a bit afraid of surrogate mother refusal to give my baby to me. There were such cases, right? How can I be sure that it wouldn’t happen to me too? Thanks in advance.

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