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Missed miscarriage and opted for natural route

Hi there, 

im currently going through this now.

missed miscarriage discovered at my what would have been 12 week Scan. Baby had passed at 8 weeks. 

I was given the natural option or the operation. I took the natural option and I am on day 6 of a small bleed. It is a week today that we found out. 

I have had cramps every evening with contraction like sensations and a few clots pass but no heavy bleeding and nothing big enough for be a sac has passed. This worries me more.

i have a scan today to see what is going on but I am petrified of it, a week ago we were in there being told our baby had died, I feel traumatised but at the same time exhausted emotionally and physically and just want this out of me now so that I can have my body back. 

Im so scared of the operation option but I know that it might be for the best as I am now exhausted and not sure how much longer I can wait. 

I would really appreciate hearing from anyone else who has gone down the natural route of waiting. 

Many thanks xxxx

Replies

  • Hi Ria. I had a mc at 7 weeks. So not quite as far along as you. I didn't really see anything large come out just blood really. I had cramps like you but didn't bleed really heavy. 

    The scan today should be able to tell you more. At my second scan to do a check they told me the sack had gone (even though I hadn't noticed this). To be honest it was a bit of a relief to be told that and gave me a bit if closure. The scan today will be hard but will definitely help to make a decision.

    Sending love x

  • Thank you for responding Lisil, I really appreciate it and I’m so sorry for your loss.

    Its given me a bit of hope that maybe the scan will show something not expected. I have zero symptoms of pregnancy, although they disappeared at week 8 so I’m morning holding onto that. 

    Fingers crossed I can come away feeling a bit more in control of this situation. 

    Thanks again xxx

  • Hi ria I had a missed miscarriage at 13 weeks, went for my 12 week scan and everything was fine and went the following week and baby had no heartbeat this was 5 weeks ago now I decided to have medical management (they inserted 4 pessaries)  the following day and was bleeding before I'd even got home and by the evening I had passed the baby, it was quite painful but I think it was the best decision for me, I bled for about another 5 days after and I went in 12 days after and confirmed a complete miscarriage, I would really research before making a decision because I had found a few people had scarring from have surgery which could make it harder to conceive in future but a lot of People were fine after, really look into before you decide because I decided that risk was to big for me, and please come and join us over on the trying to conceive after a miscarriage thread, the girls really helped me xxx

  • Hi Ria, firstly im so deeply sorry this had happened to you.

    I had a natural complete miscarriage coming up to a year ago next month. I am not sure how far along I was when I began to miscarry (Between 5-8 weeks). This is how it went... i had only known I was pregnant for 2 weeks, I had sharp and constant pain in between my shoulder blades and a brown discharge a week after I found out. 4 days later I started spotting pink blood in the evening, by the morning it was heavy with very small clots. I went to the EPU at my local hospital and was scanned and had blood taken. There was no evidence of a pregnancy in my uterus, tubes and everything else was completely empty. My heart broke, where was my baby?! I was sure I hadn't passed it and it could not be seen on the US so where was it? I was sent home with a letter confirmed I was having a miscarriage. As soon as I got home about 40 minutes after leaving the hospital I sat on the toilet and i felt a huge gush, it was the gestational sac. I called the hospital and they explained that the sac must've already passed my cervix and was on its way out. The bleeding continued to stay heavy for 3 or 4 more days and then finally came to a halt. I bled for about 6 days in total.

    Sorry if my story sounds traumatic but I'm just trying to be as honest as possible so you know what to possibly expect, but everyone is different so it could be completely different for you... Take time to heal emotionally and physically and let yourself mourn. Pregnancy loss is not something that is often talked about but this is a place where you can speak about it and someone will know how to help or advise you. The made for mums "trying to get pregnant after a miscarriage part 12" group saved me from a very dark lonely place so id thoroughly recommend it for if you're thinking about trying again soon or in the future. Sending lots of hugs to you 🤗💜

  • Thank you both. the thing is, I’m at the point where I’ve mentally prepared myself to pass the sac etc but it just isn’t happening. The nurses on the phone said it sounds like my body is ‘trying’ to miscarry which makes me think am I putting my body under unnecessary stress? 

    The op is the last thing I want but I am so scared after the scan today they are going to say something like the baby is stuck and its unlikely it will come out on its own. They refused me the medication which I wanted because it had already been a month that baby had passed away so they were worried it’s would be too much blood loss at once. But now its like I want more to come out. I brown spot all day then I have awful contractions in the night time with dark red blood and a few clots, like stringy bits of tissue. 

    I beg my body to just let the last bit go, but I’m scared it won’t and the hospital will tell me the risk of infection etc.

    lliterally feel trapped in my body. I suffer from anxiety usually so this situation is just so overwhelming, I’ve never been put under before and that’s the part I’m most scared about. 

    Thank you so much for making me feel less alone in this. 

    Xx

  • I'm sorry the process is taking its time ria. Im not going to paint this pink and glittery but it does sound like your body might need a little help. There is a chance that they might really want to go ahead with procedure due to the risk of infection as you mentioned above. I know you really don't want to, but it may be worth just considering it. What time is your scan? Fingers crossed they will have some answers for you. I suffer from anxiety too and I can only imagine how scary this is 😔 xx

  • It's such a difficult time but we are all here to help you get through it, make sure you have a thorough chat with them after your scan and find out all of your options, you may not even have much left to pass, I was spotting leading up to my scan and that's because I had a 1cm blood clot and they said it'll just come out on its own, and discharged me with a completed miscarriage just try to stay strong, if they do recommend surgery, then it's got to be better than getting an infection, an infection would pro long it further and make it more difficult to move on, think of things you can do to always remember your baby, I managed to catch my baby and saw he was a little boy, he buried him in my mums garden with a picture of me oh & lily and got some fabric to wrap him up in and a wooden box that we decorated, he has his own plant grave stone & plaque and we always have a place to visit, I also got a tattoo and a memory box, it's definitely helped with the grieving process, 

  • HI everyone, 

    thank you so much for your replies. The scan was ok, baby still there in sac so theyve booked me in for the op for next Friday. Although the nurse was quite confident that I will pass baby before then. So there is still hope. Although getting more info about the operation has made me feel better and i also feel there is a light at the end of the tunnle. whichever way, by next Saturday I will have my body back in some way and be able to focus on healing. 

    We too have made a box of our 7 week scan and little things I had for this pregnancy. 

    thank you for making me feel not so alone. I’m sure with time I will join the other thread as you mentioned. 

    Love and light to you all xxx

  • You're very welcome ria 🤗 Glad to hear youve got more of an answer from the scan. Hopefully things will move along now but if not at least you are well informed for the procedure if need be. All the best Hun 😘 xx 

  • Hi Ria, I'm so sorry for your loss, and all you have been through. im glad your scan went ok and you got more information about the op, but hopefully you do pass everything before then. 

    i  hope to see you in the other thread when you are ready :) 

  • Hi honey. So sorry to hear that. You are so brave for trying to go about it the natural way. I know the operation sounds scary. However, It is actually a lot easier than the natural route. I think going for an operation would be a good idea. Good luck!

  • Hi brave lady! Sorry for your loss. It's good that you opt the natural way as it is safer according to my personal experience. As after MC, a woman is already going through mental trauma so in addition to this it's not feasible to cut her tummy and give her several stitches on her body. The natural way is good enough just go through your scan on time and don’t worry about the cramps and bleeding. It's usual.

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