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Missed miscarriage

Hi there, Newbie here and was hoping to get some advice from ladies who have been through this.

Last Thurs evening at 11 weeks pregnant I found out that I had experienced a missed miscarriage shortly after 7 weeks. This was our 2nd attempt at IVF and when I found out that I was finally pregnant I was on top of the world! I had a 7 week scan where I saw my babies heartbeat and everything looked great. It's really hard to get my head around the fact that this must of happened shortly after the 7 week scan. The only reason I found out this had happened is because I chose to have a private scan at 11 weeks as I am a worrier and always wanted constant reassurance that everything was ok. 

I had my second scan today at the hospital to reconfirm that I had Miscarried. I opted for the surgery which is booked for tomorrow as I felt this was the best option for myself as Waiting for it too happen naturally just felt to traumatic for me.
It all feels like a bad dream that I cannot wake up from. One minute I'm ok next I burst into tears and just feel so so sad. I've been so happy the last two months as this has been everything we have wished for the last three years and I feel like all our hopes and dreams have been dashed in an instant.

Our friends who knew and family have been so supportive and this has been a great help. I know time is a healer but I am finding the thought of going back to work and carrying on as normal difficult. Also the fact that I know I will have to do IVF again when iam ready is challenging as I just feel tired of having to fight for this when everyone around me falls pregnant like that.

Sorry rant over, I fully appreciate that there most be a lot of ladies on here who have been through a much worser time than me and just wanted to ask how long it took for you to start feeling better?

Any advice would be appreciated as I do not know anyone personally who has experienced this.


  • So sorry you are going through this! I kno exactly how you are feeling as have been through 2 mcs myself with similar circumstances to you. I have been through both medical management options (pills and d&c) so can talk to you about my experiences if you feel that would help. With my first mc (which was a missed mc) one of the things I found really difficult was having so little information... I couldn’t prepare myself for what was going to happen as the doctors weren’t very helpful in talking me through it. That is actually what led me to join this site to try and find others who could help me. 

    That was almost 5 years ago now... and what I can tell you is that every single moment of pain, every single tear, drop of blood and dark moment is worth it! I truly know how hard things are for you right now but I have come out the other side & now have a beautiful 2yo boy. I can say from the bottom of my heart that whilst I wish I hadn’t had to go through all that pain to get him, I would do it all again if I had to because being his mummy is the most amazing thing in the world and having been through the miscarriages really does help me to see every single day how blessed I am now to have him! 

    Hang in there, if you have any questions or just need to talk, I am here for you! 

  • SW2 thank you so much for your reply.  I am so sorry for your losses but glad to hear that you now have a beautiful little boy.

    Everything you have said completely reasonates with me. I know no matter how tough things have been or seem now, I will never give up. I think I am just in the midst of it at the moment so it has shook me as to whether I am strong enough to keep battling on with more IVF. It would be lovely if I was able too fall pregnant naturally in the future. On the other hand I think at one time I questioned whether I could even get pregnant at all which I now know I can. Also when I found out I was pregnant this time I was even more greatful for it because of the struggle it's taken to this point.

    Sadly It was not meant to be this time but guess I just need to give it some time to get over this loss and gain some perspective.

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